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Thread: Will CD ever be acceptable?

  1. #1
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    Will CD ever be acceptable?

    Just watched Eddie Izzard in concert, and it got me thinking he and the likes of Grayson Perry are soooo cool, and accepted, yet CD could hardly have a worse image..

    How come ?
    Can CD ever be accepted?

  2. #2
    Silver Member franlee's Avatar
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    Because they are defined in their presentation and are not pushing any agenda. The dressing is not the real problem. Misunderstanding of the act is. Mainly due to so many of us wanting to sale and ideology that sexuality and orientation are the basic issues. And crossdressing is used as an umbrella for these things instead of simply wearing and enjoyment of certain clothes.

    I started many years ago. Had no desire to be a role model or to even look for any special exceptions in society. I understood and still do, I am the exception to the norm and that's fine. It is my right to dress as I please but it is not a right for me to impose on anyone else's right to disagree or even repute my dressing as long as they stay within the law.

    I don't need or want any group or organization to push my agenda. I have all the rights they seem to be hollowing for already. I have found that if you go about your own business no one really cares short of your immediate family or friends. The workplace is just that and whatever code they had when I took the job I knew and that is only right that I abide within it for my wages. If I don't like it then I need to find a new job that fits my individual needs and taste. I know very well because trust me I paid the price over the years for not cutting my hair to a Gentleman's or Military style. But I stayed within the rules until I could find a better fit for me and my skillset.

    So no I don't really believe CDing will ever be accepted but it is your right and you can do it without any special concerns if you so desire. Tolerated is what it is, more tolerated is what it will be.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]Fran
    It's worth something just being around to Fuss!

  3. #3
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    Ironic
    60 years go being gay was illegal in the UK, not sure US laws, but is now becoming fairly accepted.
    CD breaks no law, but no sign in sight of justice or freedom 🤔
    Last edited by Kirsty2907; 03-02-2021 at 06:19 PM. Reason: Not 30 years

  4. #4
    Platinum Member Karren Hutton's Avatar
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    Not going to be acceptable in my lifetime.

  5. #5
    Princess Candice candykowal's Avatar
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    Franlee. you've touched on something I totally agree with, pushing your beliefs on others is no way for anyone to accept who you are.
    I don't need special exceptions, I keep to myself and abide by objections if I am causing discomfort to another.
    I don't need government to be a big brother, that for sure!!!
    And I do my best to try to be a good ambassador for our community as a whole.

    The only way to have CDing to be totally accepted is by making it ..."NO BIG DEAL!"
    No special laws, no LGBTQ history month or government laws dictating public opinion.
    CDer's present their image in a non perverted manner, understand, respect has to be earned, and take the time and effort to be a positive influence in their local community.
    When I can, I volunteer while presenting as Candice, cooking flapjacks for the homeless, packaged goody bags for service members of the armed forces, and delivered some extra foodstuffs from our home to a food pantry.
    It takes "ALL OF US" to be good ambassadors in today's society and things are getting better depending where you live.
    Can CD ever be accepted? Yes!
    Candice Coleen Kowal ....all my friends call me Candy!

  6. #6
    Gold Member alwayshave's Avatar
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    Kristy, My belief is that it will become more acceptable. However, there will always be troglodytes who will never accept it.
    Please call me Jamie, I always_have crossdressed, I always will, "alwayshave".

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Karren Hutton View Post
    Not going to be acceptable in my lifetime.
    How very true. Society will never allow it. Otherwise we would have to wear a sign our hat...M or F.

  8. #8
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    Kirsty ,
    I know Eddie Izzard has now requested she is referred to as SHE and HER but I'm still not sure what drives Grayson Perry's needs . If you get the opportuntiy take a look at " The great pottery throwdown " I'm sure Rose who takes care of the firing of the pottery has transitioned .



    I've found being TG and presenting as a woman has been well accepted , my avatar was taken in the art room while attending my art group and I have no problems at all with being accepted as Teresa . I walk every morning with other dog walkers they are fine with me I feel totally free to live my life as I choose .

    Karren,
    Sorry but I don't agree , it can be a perfectly normal way of life if you really want it .
    Last edited by Teresa; 03-02-2021 at 07:56 PM.

  9. #9
    Silver Member Sometimes Steffi's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kirsty2907 View Post
    Ironic
    60 years go being gay was illegal in the UK, not sure US laws, but is now becoming fairly accepted.
    CD breaks no law, but no sign in sight of justice or freedom ��
    Yes, and 80 years ago the great mathematician and codebreaker Alan Turing was "chemically castrated" because he was gay. He probably did more to win WWII than General Patton.

    And to the OP's question, CDing will become acceptable when there are more CDs than muggles. Might makes right.
    Hi, I'm Steffi and I'm a crossdresser... And I accept and celebrate both sides of me. Or, maybe I'm gender fluid.

    Gender fluid (adj.) - Describes a person whose gender identity is not fixed. A person who is gender fluid may always feel like a mix of the two traditional genders, but may feel [more] like one gender some days, and [more like] another gender other days.

    Ref: https://www.lgbthealtheducation.org/wp-content/uploads/LGBT-Glossary_March2016.pdf

  10. #10
    Member MonicaPVD's Avatar
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    Most kids of the Z generation, and a vast majority of the Millennial set, could care less about gender expression. If you can be whoever you want and wear whatever clothes you want, then there's nothing left to "cross." People will eventually be judged, to paraphrase a certain pastor from Atlanta, "by the content of their character."

  11. #11
    Silver Member Sometimes Steffi's Avatar
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    ... not the color of their clothes.
    Hi, I'm Steffi and I'm a crossdresser... And I accept and celebrate both sides of me. Or, maybe I'm gender fluid.

    Gender fluid (adj.) - Describes a person whose gender identity is not fixed. A person who is gender fluid may always feel like a mix of the two traditional genders, but may feel [more] like one gender some days, and [more like] another gender other days.

    Ref: https://www.lgbthealtheducation.org/wp-content/uploads/LGBT-Glossary_March2016.pdf

  12. #12
    Aspiring Member DianeT's Avatar
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    The tendency over the years is for women and men to wear more and more the same clothes (imagine that, women wearing trousers with actual usable pockets). I think it probable that the clothes won't be a gender differentiator anymore before CDing even becomes widely accepted, so CDing, as a cloth-related differentiation, will die a natural death. The need for crossing gender boundaries should survive however, but how participants will do it, I can't figure, it will depend on the commonly accepted differentiators of the time.
    Of course this opinion is western-world centered.

  13. #13
    Platinum Member Karren Hutton's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Teresa View Post
    Karren,
    Sorry but I don't agree , it can be a perfectly normal way of life if you really want it .
    Did no say you could not make it normal.... said society was not going to accept it.... in my lifetime... and if actuarials are corrects... my prediction is only good for 13.5 more years. Lol.

  14. #14
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    I don't think it ever will. The things that have happened to me over the years has told me no.
    Last edited by DAVIDA; 03-06-2021 at 03:32 AM. Reason: There is no need to quote the OP.

  15. #15
    Senior Member GretchenM's Avatar
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    So long as the masses view gender as being binary and nothing else, there will be those who will not accept one gender expressing as the other. The binary perspective is very deeply ingrained in us because we associate gender with sex when in fact the two have little to do with each other. Gender is the collection of behaviors that we all have that allows us to fit into different social roles in the society we inhabit. Sex is independent from culture as it is the biological function of reproducing. Unfortunately, your sex role can become connected to your social role even though that is not really the case. The two involve very different parts of the brain with precious little signal crossover between the more instinctual reproductive behavior and the higher level functioning of gender which occurs in some of the most highly developed parts of the brain.

    So, if we can ever achieve a high level of understanding that gender is an expression of the personal sense of your role and place in society, a sense of self that tells you and others who you are, then gender variance will become far more acceptable as you just being you and that is OK no matter how that comes out provided it does no harm to others which makes it moral and ethical. We are moving in that direction as a species, but there are still forces around that want to stop that expansion simply because those people are stuck in binary thinking and wield a lot of power.

    But I believe eventually far, far wider acceptance of gender variance will become so ingrained into the social fabric that the old binary views will become archaic and quaint foolishness. We are all different when it comes to gender and therefore we are all equal when it comes to gender.

  16. #16
    Member MonicaPVD's Avatar
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    To add to my unsolicited musings, it seems to me that what we know to be modern, primarily urban western civilization will continue to rapidly evolve towards a place where gender identity is not an issue. I am in my fourth decade and have witnessed this remarkable transformation over the past 25 years. It's truly amazing. However, there will always be people who adhere to traditional values, including the binary view of gender, that reinforce their religious beliefs or their view of the world. The important thing in my opinion is that humanity in general is moving closer towards a space where people can be valued for what is in our minds and in our hearts, and not for the clothes we wear, whether they are clothes that sign a different gender or a particular socioeconomic level.

  17. #17
    Aspiring Member Star01's Avatar
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    I sometimes mention my small town surroundings in discussions about going out dressed. I think location again has a lot to do with it. The rural Midwest does not look to entertainers as role models so any advances Eddy Izzard (never heard of her) makes in the eyes of the more progressive are probably not shared here.

    Big city life and thinking is not the driving force where I live. I think everyone should spend a week in a small town in order to get a better understanding of what the rest of the wide open spaces are like. No, I don?t see crossdressing ever being acceptable where I live. Go out at ones own risk here.

  18. #18
    Aspiring Member josie_S's Avatar
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    As much as I would like to say yes, my guess is no. although like Monica said, gen-z and most millennials are typically not interested in old ideas about gender and sexuality. That might change as they get older but I doubt it. Still, it's not like there aren't very loud voices that condemn anything that violates the binary (although it makes me wonder what their browsing history might look like )

    The key question I think is do you accept yourself? I don't say that because I've figured it all out or anything--far from. But I am reminding myself to be more focused on that question than any other, and for me that's a better place to be

  19. #19
    Sort of a n00b Pixie_94's Avatar
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    Probably not in Latin America, according to what I have seen every once in a while. Churches and sects where they still force archaic ideas onto people and said people are very vocal. Also that it will still be misinterpreted as one way of being gay or a sign of being trans (even when there's no dysphoria at all) for example.

  20. #20
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    I'll go with "Not in my lifetime!" which is shorter than most on the forum since I am already into my eighth decade on this planet. There is still too many people who will get in your face about sexual minorities. You're on the internet. Just peruse the news stories about legislation to allow people to discriminate against others. Legal acceptance as in my state (Washington) will not necessarily get you an invitation to the neighborhood BBQ with "Oh, by the way, please wear that pretty floral sundress!" In my eighth decade I have come to the conclusion it is "not I" who has a problem, it is "them" who are the problem. I only have to react to it.

  21. #21
    Sallee Sallee's Avatar
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    I want to say it already is acceptable in that most people accept it if presented with it. The biggest problem I think is accepting it in ourselves. I know that is my problem. I think for the most part I am pretty blendable and don't or don't perceive myself as being clocked very often. Now I don't know if that is true or not if no one says anything. I have been to makeup counters in dept stores and had nothing said. Even had makeup applied there. They had to know but didn't care, a sale was about to be made that's all that matters.
    NOw could you take your car to the shop or go to the hardware store, probably there is money to be made. They may and probably will read you but they just don't care as long as you are dressed to be presentable, no 6" heels or skirts to the upper thigh. That will turn heads no matter who is wearing it.
    So accept yourselve and so will others. Not that I can always do that
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]Sallee

  22. #22
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    I do feel we are looking at a " Chicken and egg " situation here .

    Can you truly answer this question until you've lived it ? Looking back I would have answered NO it's never going to happen because I hadn't experienced what it's like to go out as a TG person . Three years on and I wonder what all the fuss is about , personally I am surprised at the acceptance level I've experienced .

    I do agree with the comments of knowing yourself , accepting youself and believe in you , others pick up on that .

  23. #23
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    I think we are more accessible than we think had some ladies in a group I talk to tell me they go to
    bar and have a drink and some GG's came over and asked If they would like to join them. They were curious and wanted to ask some questions. They said they didn't feel threatened and enjoyed the company. Some loved the the idea a chick with a d. I think if we are going to be excepted we need to get off our butts and get out there.

  24. #24
    Sunshine Gal AngelaYVR's Avatar
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    For those of us who are part time and go out, we make a tiny minority of the total crossdressing population. Expecting some sort of mass acceptance seems fruitless when you are up against the (largely factual) typical view that CDs are lurking at home for their own self pleasure. Having said that, if you put some effort into looking nice and act like you belong, then individual acceptance is easy to obtain.

  25. #25
    Silver Member LilSissyStevie's Avatar
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    It will probably become irrelevant before it becomes acceptable.

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