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Thread: Do you ever wonder....

  1. #1
    Senior Member Jenn A116's Avatar
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    Do you ever wonder....

    ...about which of your male friends might also be a closeted CD?

    I'm totally in he closet (except for my wife) so none of my friends know about Jenn. Given the statistics about how many guys are also CD's I'm sure at least one of my many friends/acquaintances are also CD. But which ones???

    Just musing here. Not really trying to figure out which of my friends are CD.
    Jenn A --- nothing fancy, just me.

  2. #2
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    CONSTANTLY!

    A person I was friends with in college later came out as trans, and I'm still friends with her on Facebook...and I'm fairly sure my crossdressing came up in conversations before she really begun her transition, but while she's cool and all we're not exactly best friends and there's frankly not that much common ground between us...and she's also not particularly socially media active, so.

    ...it would stand to reason others that are gender fluid or crossdressers like myself. I'm obviously cool with whatever, but as we all know it's a personal journey for everyone...so I'm just constantly supportive of all lifestyles, cultures, etc...and hope that if someone is comfortable enough that they would confide in me as I have with

  3. #3
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    Most of my friends r CD/trans these days! Once u get out and about, socializing with other dressers? U won't have to wonder anymore!
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  4. #4
    Exploring NEPA now Cheryl T's Avatar
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    I've thought about it on occasion but I really don't think any of my close friends are.
    When I first began going in public and the wife and I attended a support group meeting for the first time she brought it up. She asked me what would happen if we met someone we knew at the meeting. I said nothing would happen. She was confused.
    I told her what if we do. Will they run to all our friends on Monday and say, "guess who I saw at my crossdressers meeting Saturday"? I don't think that would happen. There might be an awkward moment but then that would pass as we'd all be there for the same reasons wouldn't we.
    I don't wear women's clothes, I wear MY clothes !

  5. #5
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    My ex and i had this conversation after a meeting with a family counselor suggested we join a local CD support group. She was reluctant to attend, but she was dying to know which prominent local people might be participants. I wish we had followed through with joining the group. It might have helped her deal with her apprehensions if she had seen other CD and trans people were just like everyone else...in fact were among everyone else.
    Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one.

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  6. #6
    Aspiring Member jacques's Avatar
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    hello Jenna,
    of course - it is only natural to speculate, and even if you are not correct it is fun to imagine.
    luv J

  7. #7
    Non-Binary Member Krea's Avatar
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    Yes, it's natural for us to wonder. I can't think of any acquaintances who might be, but then how would i know? Those of us who are/were in the closet are often adept at concealing our true feelings....

  8. #8
    Miss Conception Karren H's Avatar
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    I already have a few local CD friends. But 20 years ago I had this friend... we shared the same interest in old Swedish sports cars... and I always got this slightly feminine vibe from him. Well a few years later, after he sold me his old car, he came out to everyone as trans... split from his wife, had all the surgeries, and move away and is now living as a female. Betting There are more of us out there than statistics would dictate.

  9. #9
    Member Misty_cder's Avatar
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    I have wondered my self too. About 15 years ago, my wife and I found out the husband of good friends crossdressed, but it wasn't under the best circumstances. He kept it hidden from his wife and one day she came home early to find him dressed up and on the computer instant messaging with other CDer's when he should have been looking for a job. We got "roped into" their disagreement when he showed up at our house asking if he could stay the night after she kicked him out. He did tell us the reason why and we informed him we had no issue with his dressing. After a few days passed, my wife and I discussed if mentioning I dressed would help our friend work towards accepting her husband's dressing. We first confided to him to see if he thought it would help. He was surprised to find out and thought of me as a typical "manly man". When we all sat down, my wife brought up my dressing and the ground rules she had for me at the time. It seemed to help. She allowed him back into the house, but about three months later she kicked him out again and filed divorce papers. He stayed with us while they completed the divorce and afterwards he moved back home to Sweden. We never heard from either of them again.

  10. #10
    Princess Candice candykowal's Avatar
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    I am sure, I have a few friends and family members who CD or are Gay / Lesbians.
    My best friend from my bachelor days never did anything to warrant me to think he was gay.
    We jammed in a professional band, party-ed many times, even went on far vacations together.
    Then, when I met my wife, he turned and never was very friendly anymore.
    I asked him to be my best man but he declined! Till this day, I suspect he is gay as he never had a girl friend.
    I kind of feel bad I never told him about Candy but then again, I never though of him that way.
    I am guessing my nephew is TG as he has some issues finding himself.
    Then, going thru my mothers old pictures, I come across a picture of my Mom and Dad at a very early 1950's Haloween party.
    Mom dressed as a guy, Dad dressed as a lady.
    After all the talks of me not being a femme, he shows up in a picture in a dress and wig!
    Candice Coleen Kowal ....all my friends call me Candy!

  11. #11
    Gold Member Sometimes Steffi's Avatar
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    I've written many times before, but I was talking to a random CD girl at Keystone Conference, and found out that she was actually a good friend in high school.
    Hi, I'm Steffi and I'm a crossdresser... And I accept and celebrate both sides of me. Or, maybe I'm gender fluid.

  12. #12
    Junior Member AndieB's Avatar
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    I only have a small group of male friends and I doubt any of them are closet CD's. But there's no doubt other people I know, whether it be at work or in the same town, could definitely have some CD's mixed in there.

    It's so depressing that so many have to live in the closet.

  13. #13
    Gold Member Helen_Highwater's Avatar
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    As we all know, during the pandemic hairdressers have been closed. A neighbour of mine has let his hair grow such that it's down to his shoulders. There's many a GG who would like his head of hair and I've written before that the style is very feme and it had made me wonder if I had a kindred spirit living a few doors away.

  14. #14
    Member Billie's Avatar
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    I don't think I do. I would think that with my nails being done for almost two years now and wearing women's pants and shorts exclusively for longer than that, if I had a friend that did they would say something. Although I am the "Conservative" one in most situations where that might come up.

  15. #15
    Senior Member GretchenM's Avatar
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    You never know and it is hard to tell. Here is an interesting tidbit. In the Ken Burns series on Ernest Hemingway it was revealed that this super macho man loved to roll play in the bedroom with his wife. He would be, I think it was Catherine, and his wife would be Pete. Of course no further details. But it goes to show that even the most macho men can have another side.

  16. #16
    Reality Check
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    I don't know who compiles the "statistics" on what percentage of the population is crossdressers, etc., but I suspect they are nothing but guesses. I've never received a form to fill out and I'm not sure I would be totally honest even if I did receive one.

    How many people here have ever participated in a poll or survey that asked if they were a crossdresser?
    Krisi

  17. #17
    Princess Candice candykowal's Avatar
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    I bet if we made a poll of who is crossdressing here, the number would be pretty high.... sorry, had to go there.....
    Candice Coleen Kowal ....all my friends call me Candy!

  18. #18
    Platinum Member Shelly Preston's Avatar
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    Sometimes you don't have to wonder.

    Two people I went to school with are TG.
    Shelly

    Super Moderator....How to tell your partner......Abbreviations

  19. #19
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    Hi Genna , I often as I walk through Lowe's & Home Depot

    How many of the Macho Guys there are also Under Dressed ?????????

    >>>>>>>>>>Orchid**OO**
    Having my ears triple pierced is AWESOME, ~~......

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  20. #20
    Member Jessica S's Avatar
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    I often wonder also which of my friends may be a crossdresser. I have had my suspicions on a couple of them but that may be me projecting.

  21. #21
    Aspiring Member Violetgray's Avatar
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    I'm 100% that which with burns within us smolders within your average man. They just won't allow themselves to explore.

  22. #22
    Life is more fun in heels Genifer Teal's Avatar
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    Someone I worked with didn't come out to me until shortly before retiring. They knew for a while about me but hadn't said anything about them self. We've stayed in touch.

  23. #23
    Aspiring Shopaholic BTWimRobin's Avatar
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    As I read through the various forums I am totally blown away by the number of men who take part in this lifestyle. I would not be surprised if someone I knew dressed.
    - Robin


    Because life is too short not to.

    It's ironic ... I finally found a group of guys I fit in with. Funny how they all enjoy being one of the girls.

    Wife: Why do you fold your panties? Me: I don't like my panties in a wad!

  24. #24
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    In boy scouts, one of my fellow scouts was found out as having a pair of pantyhose in his jacket pocket. He was heavily bullied about it. He tried to claim it was for kite tails. But, what teenage boy is going to be carrying around pantyhose for kite tails? He was a good friend of mine for many years (we've sadly since parted ways due to his wife), but the subject of crossdressing never came up. Him being bullied taught me to remain secret (as if I didn't know already).

    I've never suspected any other friend to be a crossdresser. Odds are, at least one of them has been, but I've been unaware just as they have been unaware about me. I once found a pair of pantyhose in my brother's horse riding gear. That's a legitimate use, as it prevents chafing while riding for extended periods, which he did. I never asked him about it. He has made a lot of statements over the years that display his hatred of LGBTQIA+ people. So, unless he's covering for himself, I doubt he's a crossdresser. Little does he know the people he professes hate for are closer than he would ever imagine.

  25. #25
    Silver Member Amy Lynn3's Avatar
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    I need not worry about one of my friends I grew up with. Their were about five of us guys in the neighborhood, that were the same age. From small boys we played together, doing boy things. At about age 12 I was fully on my way to being a cder. I underdressed much of the time, when playing with others. One of the guys always seemed to be a little different from the rest, when it came to things of interest. I kept my eyes on him for years and then one day we were coasting down hills on a homemade wagon and my friend wrecked. It was a bad wreck and we all gathered around him, while he was on the ground, and when he/her turned over, without him knowing, he had torn the seat out of his pants, when he wrecked. Well, my eyes focused on the white nylon panties he was wearing under his pants. To me that assured me I had a friend to share with. As my luck would be, due to his parents divorce he/she moved away. I only saw him/her one time after they moved away and it was a open area, out in public and we could not talk in private.

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