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Hi All,
I thought I give an update of my progress to anyone who is intrested in it.
I stopped CDing 3 months now. The urge is less powerfull and more distant everyday. Right now I have a relatively strong urge in every 2 weeks which lasts a couple of minutes, but fades quickly. And the other thing is when the urge rises it's not so much about the whole CDing as an experience anymore, rather it's about a specific item which misses at the moment.
A couple things that helped me get here that I want to share with you I believe that I needed ALL of them to stop CDing organically and not feeling miserable about it. Without either of those thing I would have relapsed by know. Which is OK by the way, but more on that later.
First I meditate everyday once or twice. That way I can refelect on my urge and not repressing it. If it rises during meditation, I just stay with it and let it pass, that way I experience it's not concrete nature, which means it always comes and goes, just like bad weather.
Second I have hobbies that channel my intellectual/creative energy so I have less oportunity to think about CDing.
I purged gradually. I always purged the items that no longer missed so much and kept only the core items. And if my relationship changed to another item, I purged it too. So I purged everything in two months. Right now I only miss my bra and my wig if I'm missing it at all.
And last, I know that if I fail, it's ok to go back. My wife accepts me and supports me, just right now it's better for our relationship if I'm not doing it. So the thought of 'stopping forever' isn't there which would mean it's harder to stop.
+1: I know that my CD urge is not so deeply in me as many of you so I'm sure that helped stopping too. I only started CDing three years ago, and I have 2-3 experience from younger age which could be related to this. So it's more of a "fetish to experience my defenitely real but not so big feminine side".
The interesting thing I noticed which is wirth mentioning, that my sex life with my wife is far better and more intimite, because I don't channel a large part of my sexual energy to a side activity.
Again I want to stress that I don't say everyone should do it, I just want to have this sort of experience in the forum too. Mybe I'm not the only one with this set of circumstances and I wanted to have this sort if discussion, which maybe can help or encourage others who want the same thing as me.
Cheers,
Tomi
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