Post 999

[TheHiddenMe]

A little over five years ago, I finally signed up for this board, with the following introduction:

Long time lurker, first time poster

I guess as you get older, you get less fearful of outing yourself to others.

So after a long time lurking (and a previous time when I was signed up but never posted), I finally decided it was time.

My crossdressing urges date to when I was younger than 10. I can remember visiting my aunt and uncle's condo in Chicago, and there were clothes hanging in their common basement. One item was a girl's dress, and I wanted to try it on. Unfortunately, I was a bit chunky as a youth (and for most of my life I've fluctuated being chunky and extra chunky), and the dress didn't fit. The attraction has been there since.

In grade school I was always jealous of the boys who went as girls for Halloween. Finally in 8th grade it was my turn. I got to go trick or treating dressed in my older sister's clothes. Nothing fancy, just a top and a skirt, knee socks and my own tennis shoes, and my mom's wig. Our next door neighbor thought I was my sister (probably bad news for my sister).

Since then I've been out dressed a few times. My wife of 20+ years knows, but she is the only one. She is tolerant but mostly not enthusiastic about my dressing. She's bought me a few things (usually panties), and I have saved some of her clothes before they made it to Goodwill (after losing 40 pounds the last couple of years I am closer in size to her; still would like to drop another dress size).

So as I get older I guess I'm getting bolder. Not ready for pictures yet, but that is down the road.

I'm from the St. Louis area, retired accountant, sports enthusiast, and a crossdresser.

The hidden side of me.

Nine-hundred-ninty-nine posts later, I'm still here.

I posted pictures a few days later, then sucked up my courage in October 2016 and went out the door; got my nails done, makeover at Sephora, tried on dresses, bought a wig dressed. My original bucket list.

Since then, I've lost count, but I've been out at least 250 times--and I've got a Google photos account to prove it.

I picked up a name--Dee--when my Nordstrom friend Falon couldn't write my girl name on the dressing room because I didn't have a girl name. She just called me my male name. She's still my friend, but she's now a paralegal, and I'm proud of her.

I've made other friends too, one who passes on her former clothes to me (Michelle), another who I see from time to time (Karla), and another friend Renee, who helped me dress many a moon ago, but we've reconnected via the interwebs.

I've been out in multiple cities and two continents. Taken trains (both local and long distance), gone to concerts, gone out to dinner and casinos, shopped and shopped and shopped until I dropped. Joined the St. Louis Gender Foundation, so I've met others in the St. Louis area.

I've also met others on this board, and one of them was silly enough to let me write blog posts on her blog, where I'm the designated Sun-Dee poster (thanks, Kandi).

I've got a wardrobe full of cute clothes, and apparently good enough taste that Michelle's 11 y/o daughter Mila told Michelle she wants to go shopping with me (I'm all in with that).

I've made friends, received compliments from strangers, gotten hit on, and been seen by lots of people--but never had a bad experience. NEVER.

I've gotten compliments on this board too. I appreciate hearing those. A large part of screwing up my courage to go out was reading posts on this board--and blogs like Kandi's and Stana's and Hannah's--and deciding I can do that too.

Five years on, I still enjoy getting out (like last Wednesday). I wore a backless summer dress with bare shoulders, and I loved the look. Made me feel good.

Usually it just takes one GIANT step to get out the door, but after that, the steps become a lot easier.

Now it's over to the picture board for post 1,000....

[kimdl93]

Congratulations, Dee! What I admire is that once you realized you could do this, you kept at it and grew with it.

I have taken inspiration and motivation from the good people here as well as the blogs you mentioned. Nothing like having positive examples of life’s possibilities!

[DianeT]

Congrats Dee, it's nice to read that you never had a bad experience (note that if you are 7 feet tall or more it doesn't count ). It's encouraging for those who would like to cross that bridge but still hesitate.

[TheHiddenMe]

No, I'm not 7 foot (although I do have a nephew that is 7'1").

I'm 5'8" so I am not outsized. I'm about the same height as my GG friend Michelle.

I have gotten bolder, once I realized there were no torches and pitchforks waiting once I stepped out. For example, the second dress I bought on my initial time out was long sleeved to hide everything. This week I went out in a scrappy backless summer dress that showed my guy shoulders and my upper back. It looked good and it made it cool enough to go out in the summer heat.

The fact is, most people don’t care, and those who care, have been good to me.

[kimdl93]

My experiences with going out pretty much mirror yours. Very few exhibit any reaction, and as long as they keep their opinions to themselves, they can think whatever they wish.

Also, I had an epithany about man shoulders a couple years ago. That is, the conventional wisdom really does not hold water. Most of us can look good wearing sleeveless tops and strappy dresses. Its all a matter of proportion.

[TheHiddenMe]

If we worry about what other people think, we surrender control over our lives to others.

I decided a long time ago, people may see a man in a dress, but they don't know it's ME in the dress--and I just want to make sure it's a pretty dress.

I know others write about blending, but I like wearing dresses, and I wear dresses that are sold in stores, so someone must be wearing them.

Of course, I don't think Windsor stores target 60-something guys as the target market for their summer dresses, but it looked good and felt good.

[candykowal]

On to 1000....keep em coming and be all you can be as life is too short to do anything else!!!!

[Brandybea]

1000 posts, what a milestone! Congrats for that and your courage!

[Sandi Beech]

Congratulations on hitting 1000, and I do like reading your posts so keep them coming please. I started going out dressed in public about a year after you, and I have to agree it has been great although I do not think I have been out as much as you. It is really great that you have some GG friends to socialize with. That is like icing on the cake.

Sandi

[TheHiddenMe]

All, thanks again. I like getting out and then writing about it; it helps feed my narcissism.

Sandi,

Although I might have been out more often than you, I think more of YOU has been out based on some of your posts.

I am extremely lucky to have GG friends that like spending time with me. Even in my wildest dreams I never thought that would happen.