Hi, Charlotte.
Your first sentence describes gender dysphoria in the first five words, "I hate my male form..."
The rest of that sentence, "...I will never pass as a female," is true for most of us who were AMAB. The good news is that you don't have to "pass" in order to be accepted and treated as a woman. It's true - most people will treat us as the gender we present, because it's the polite thing to do, and most people are polite. Yes, of course there are ignorant assholes out there, but they are fewer and further between than most here seem to believe. When it's friends and family who are so ignorant and fearful though, it's as if the whole world is so because "everyone who matters" is so.
What you describe as "depression" is, probably, the dysphoria. When we can not live as our authentic selves, the world can look pretty bleak. Are you in counseling? If not, get started ASAP. A skilled therapist and an honest, diligent approach by you will pay off.
