psychology questions, sort of:

[Dutchess]

Seriously , a man puts my hand on his crotch with the first kiss then I know what hes after and what he thinks of me and thats not very much . Even when I was a teenager I had a rule that if he kisses me and tries to get down my shirt at the same time , then he is OUT ! That was the 70s and that rule is still with me today .

From the outside looking in I see alot of people here dress as a reaction to stress , loneliness , loss or major changes ( although most will deny it ) and alot of AGP .
All the statements about starting before puberty are fine except that we are born sexual creatures and feelings like that start way before puberty ... you dont have to know "what it is "

[Alice Torn]

I think part of me dresses out of loneliness, as 67yo, and never had steady lady friend or mate or sex, and only one lip kiss. And other reasons too.

[sometimes_miss]

no real hope of finding an answer, but I persist on.

There ARE answers, just you haven't found YOURS. If you're looking for that ONE, TRUE cause of crossdressing, well, sorry, you're never going to find it. The best you can do, is discover why YOU do it, and then work from there. I'm sort of lucky; I managed to figure myself out, but it took about 30 years to do it, with little to no help from the psychiatrists/psychologists; often, I knew more than they did, as it's still a new science.

Serious question, if the psychologists have no real answers, does talking to a therapist still help? Thanks

They may help you find answers, but you may not be happy with what you find out. The whole 'born this way' doesn't always hold true. You have to be willing to accept uncomfortable concepts that you discover as you learn more about it. And then, you will have to be willing to accept that there are things that you really don't like, that you are going to have to live with.
I did. Feel free to read my CD bio, link is in my sig below. It describes the events which all contribute to turning a normal little boy into a crossdresser that feels like he's supposed to be transgendered, but it turns out not to be that at all.
Life throws us lots of curve balls. But you don't have to swing at them all.

If you don't have the knowledge to figure yourself out, then perhaps a therapist could help. But remember, just like every other profession, there are good ones, average ones, and bad ones. If you don't seem to be able to make progress, perhaps try someone else.

[Pumped]

Guys need to realize, and I think women would understand us better if they realize men have a "male" side, the instinctive, need to go procreate and screw every female part, and then there is the "man" that is the logical side, the side that knows right from wrong and keeps the male side from running rampant. I believe all men have these two sides. Some have more or perhaps too much of one side and none or little of the other and that is why they get in trouble in today's society.

I personally have issues with objectifying women. I know it isn't right, but the male part of me wants to go there and the man in me does pretty well keeping it at bay. I know if I see an attractive women my body chemistry goes crazy. (Not the obvious thing!) I don't know what goes on inside, but I feel the release of some chemical in my body, endorphins, adrenaline, I don't know, but I certainly feel something going on, certainly some natural reaction that happens to a male that kicks in the desire to copulate. I realize when it happens I need to "idle down" before I get myself in trouble. For me it is a very powerful reaction. I believe most men that have the same reaction, but have little control can get into big trouble because of it.

My wife also says that men are all "boys" and do boy stuff. It doesn't matter the age, we are all boys to some degree and do stupid stuff! She had a discussion with her older sister about her husband doing stupid stuff and my wife told her he is a boy, and that is what they do. Her sister said, "but he is 75 years old!" My wife told her it doesn't matter, they are all boys, no matter the age. I think it helped her understand better.

Many of these "boys" think like "males" and believe they can get away with bad behavior. Perhaps their parents never taught them right and wrong.

[mbmeen12]

there are multiple reasons we crossdress,

ding ding ding and perfectly simplified.

[Suzih]

Sometimes Miss: I read your earlier posts about how things were growing up and, your later life. Your story is a sad one for sure, but I feel you have great inner strength and something special to offer.
Thank you for sharing this. SuziH

[MiniRock]

Some women find it exciting to be treated in a degrading manner.

It's not degrading Monica. As Bethany said, he obviously read the signs.