We see so many posts planning with such glee the times you have to dress when either you are going on a trip or the wife ( family) is away so you can dress freely.
Do you at times wish you lived alone ? Does the thought cross your mind? Do you wish things would be different? And how so?
I will write more later.
Just wondering.
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I'll start with a No I don't wish to live alone. My wife has been fighting Stage 4 Ovarian Cancer sine June of 2015. I don't know how much more time I have with her but I cherish every moment I have with her.
Jill
I have lived on both sides of the fence
I was married and dressing in secret for a while
I told my then wife and she was DADT for a while.
Then became more accepting and I was able to dress whenever I wanted
then separated and now living alone and am free to dress whenever I want
Sure I do prefer dressing, But certainly would not risk family or friendship for my dressing time.
the failure in the marriage certainly had nothing to do with my dressing. Just so that is clear
I was the one that had enough and decided it was over
PS: thanks for stimulatingly the forum and creating some thought about a post.
Last edited by Raychel; 07-25-2021 at 08:57 AM.
my sister's reply when I told her how I prefer to dress
"Everyone has there thing, all that matters is that you are happy, love what you do and who you do it with"
I would not like living alone at all, even though it means being secretive with a wife who would be totally non-accepting. Here's why: It was during a two week absence, when I had the place to myself during the day when the kids were at school, that I explored more deeply into crossdressing in answer to the angst I felt. Needless to say, I enjoyed it and still do, but not the alone-ness. I would like the occasional day to myself for some CD fun, though. I'm glad not to be alone since it provides a regulator to keep my 'peculiar pastime' in check, so I don't do too many stupid things. I do have ample things which need to be done which could be neglected if I had unlimited free time to dress up.
I have spent much of my adult life being alone (aside from a wonderful family but it would be nice to have my own circle and group) and have lived on my own for 12 years now. Almost no friends and no social life even when there's no global pandemic on. I can dress any time I like, however I like but usually don't bother getting dressed up and if I went out, it will be on my own or sitting in a room full of strangers.
For those who have a hectic family life and/or those who have been struggling during lockdown etc who are craving for some space, I hope you get it but as the old saying goes, be careful what you wish for because you just might get it
Be careful what you wish for.
Interesting question. I have been alone now for more than 5 years, but not by choice. I have been able to dress as I wish when I choose to do so.
Does this make up for the loss of a partner? For me, the answer is No.
But honestly, after two long marriages, each ending due to my own mistakes and bad judgement, I am unwilling to make the effort to start a new relationship.
Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one.
Eleanor Roosevelt
My background is similar to Raychel.
Being an only child I had time to myself as both parents worked.
I married and stayed in the closet stealing time when I could, always on pins and needles, but loving the time I had to myself.
She discovered me and it became DADT. That lasted nearly 20 years till I could no longer remain in the closet.
I told her of my need for expression, we talked and talked and she agreed to try. After some time, more talk, joining a crossdressers group and talking with others she became accepting and I was free to dress when I please. We also would go out together and with others from the group.
Now I dress daily and she's fully accepting. There are stretches of a week or so where I am 24/7 before something requires me to be in drab. The family is unaware as are most of the neighbors so some privacy is maintained.
Do I wish I was alone? No, I love sharing all of me with my wife and wish it could have happened long ago so that those moments I stole from her to be me could have been shared with her as well.
I don't wear women's clothes, I wear MY clothes !
I do not wish I lived alone. I am lucky to have a wife who is supportive. We have agreed boundaries and life with my lovely wife is wonderful and I would not change a thing.
Teri Ray Rural Idaho Girl.
I have had thoughts of it being better to be alone for the sake of CD'ing. But, the reality is that my wife makes my heart beat.
Total DADT and there will never be any give in that situation. On the other hand, I don't have to hide anything.
And I get plenty of privacy to dress up. I've had times of extended alone time and truly enjoyed the 24/7 experience.
Except the loneliness that eventually creeps in to the situation. Cd'ing is something I'm obsessed with and totally enjoy.
But my relationship with my wife is far more important. She's the love of my life.
I've waited so long for this time. Makeup is so frustrating. Shaking hands and I look so old. This was a mistake.
My new maid's outfit is cute. Sure fits tight.
And then I step into the bedroom and in the mirror, I see a beautiful woman looking back at me.
Smile, Honey! You look fabulous!
I tried alone and I tried living with my wife of 44 years. I joined the US Army Reserve long ago. From time to time, Uncle Sam decides to go to the fights and he invites me to come along. There have been three such occasions since I signed up. Each has been about a year away from home and family. The first one, we were getting shot at. Only on the third and last deployment, did I have time and opportunity to dress.
Uncle Sam paid for a first rate education for me to learn high tech ways to harm his enemies. Therefore, the last two occasions, I stayed in military labs, alone but far from the fray. I concur that I prefer being with my wife, not alone. This reminds me of the poor man who inherited a fortune later in life. He said that he tried being poor and being rich. Rich, he said, is better. In my case, I tried alone and together. In my opinion, together is better.
BTW, when Uncle Sam decides on another big get together at the fights, if he invites me at my advanced age, he will be scraping the bottom of the barrel for sure.
Last edited by abby054; 09-05-2021 at 08:13 PM.
I would NOT want to live alone. Before meeting my current wife I lived alone and dressed whenever I wanted, but never felt fulfilled. It is so much more fun to have someone to share it with. Not to mention the tips, tricks, and help with zippers and bra straps. Even male mode in public , we have fun with inside jokes, innuendos, and "If they only KNEW" moments" because I am under dressed
"Out of ALL the thing I have lost, it's my mind that I miss the most"
Stephanie 334 recently posted about the "new normal" of being alone. I tried not to empathize too much but failed. Reading and relating to the story caused me to have a panic attack thinking of the health situations my wife and I have been in over the 3 decades. It's a HUGE NO to being alone for me. She tolerates my dressing and the complications it brings and I appreciate her for it. We both wish it were easier.
Last edited by Bea_; 07-25-2021 at 09:40 AM.
No. I do agree with your assessment and probably fall into that category of dressing when alone or on a trip. My wife and I are in a deep DADT. Before she fully retired I had many days per week to fully dress. I did all the domestic chores a la June Cleaver. When she would visit our daughter or her cousin out of state for a week to ten days I could and did dress 24/7. I miss those opportunities and wish my wife did have some interests that would give me some Stephanie time. In the beginning I was always grabbing those "crumbs of time" as I call it. The nerve racking thing is not being able to fully express myself with the person I love. I will say, if my wife were to pass away before me, there would be no way in hell I would ever be put into a restrictive relationship again.
Di,
I have an accepting/ supportive wife and I can dress when I want . We pretty much spend our free time together , and I?ve lived alone before I met her for a few years. For the amount I dress, I?m happy that she?s here.
If you only knew the power of the pink fog! ~Joss
I absolutely love being a part-time woman. In fact, I'm obsessed with the idea. If I was 40 yrs younger with the resources, I would become the beautiful young lady that I can now only dream of being. Even if I had a fairy godmother who could wave her magic wand and make this dream come true, I would not request it. I have one thing that I would not trade for the opportunity to live the rest of my life as the woman I so long to be... and that is the loving relationships that I have with my family members. That being said... If I had one wish, I would wish to live in parallel universes so that I could live out both scenarios! teehee. I know that's cheating... but hey... it's my wish! lol. 😉
Me too. I love being a part time woman. I have dreamed of being catered to. Women get to dress and wear pretty clothes and I am somewhat jealous
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Living alone is a double edged sword. There are times when I truly enjoy being alone and free to dress whenever I want. But it is how I got there. My wife of 49 years died in February 2021 of pancreatic cancer. I miss her terribly. She was totally against my cross dressing. I had to secretly dress all these years. I tried to quit but the need was always there. My Kendra time has always been part of my life. I wish I was passable but no way I am. No one knew except for my wife.. I wish I could have her back but cross dressing is my way of partially coping with the grief
No idea to be honest. I have been busy with some things to even consider any of this without guilt or even frustration appearing.
Do I at times wish I lived alone? Does the thought cross my mind?
No, never, absolutely not, even for a nano-second. I am one of those really, really lucky guys who has an amazing supportive, understanding and participating wife who has never restricted me.
In fact, almost all of the time when I dress as Teresa for a day, a few days, or even longer periods when on vacation travel, is when we are together.
When I dress alone to live out my fantasy that I am a pretty feminine woman is lots of fun. But nothing beats being with my wife who is great at pretending to be my girlfriend and for us to just have fun together. In reality though, is matters not what persona I present, the two of us are happiest when we are together.
Last edited by Teresa.Smith.VA; 07-25-2021 at 03:09 PM. Reason: Word smithing
I honor my wife's request that I not post pictures.
I can't say that I've never thought about it.
My relationship with my wife is DADT. I just took a quick shower, all the time worried that my wife would get unglued from watching the Olympics and come up and see my painted toenails.
Unlike many of the rest of you, my wife and I are more like housemates rather than lovers.
So, I do think about it from time to time.
Hi, I'm Steffi and I'm a crossdresser... And I accept and celebrate both sides of me. Or, maybe I'm gender fluid.
Even though Im alone, and dress when I want, I rather be with my partner but will not get back in a relationship at my age
Wanting something is a fantasy which on a long time period clouds your mind and makes you think you need it.
Rayleen
I do enjoy living alone and not having to worry about anyone elses' thoughts on my dressing. I can dress and usually do everyday and feel good about it. Most of the time my laundry consists 95%female and 5% male items with a few unisex mixed in.
I divorced 3 years ago ( wife left me) - Now I am very happy for the time being and am able to CD when I want- I LOVE living alone ! I love being single and free ( I was married for 23 years so I dont want to go back there ever again) If I was married right now I would not dress though ( I used to dress some rare times secretly- the wife never knew) Im a bit of a lone wolf, I am a bit eccentric and I am at peace and love my times of solitude. Its not like I dont get out and about though.
I live alone and my life is really good. I visit my family all the time. But when I get home and close the door I am Suzy. Its the best of both worlds for me.
I never have been married nor had a SO, but i have had housemates and i had to hide it all, from the guy and women i shared places with Have lived alone for 13 yrs now. but very seldom have dressed the past year. Health problems, loss of job, moving a lot, and my mental and emotional and social health issues, too. I need to change and get well, and sometimes i just totally isolate myself in my own world, and dressing makes it even worse, as a loner, and isolating, and i am trying to quit for good.
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