My wife, who knows, but we are DADT, has left me frustrated and very annoyed at her hypocrisy.

It's come in two parts.

Firstly, she is finding her current underwear to be uncomfortable for running as it is riding up between the cheeks. Yeah, totally get why that's uncomfortable. Her solution? She's using some boxers that were bought for me but were too small. They're apparently extremely comfortable, and naturally I said I was fine with it - I don't have a problem with her wearing the clothes that make her feel more comfortable.

She wasn't wearing them last night, and I joked "Oh, is the underwear swap not happening any more?", and just had a "Oh they're in the wash, I might get some more though?"

Again, I was supportive, and it had become clear that she was talking about wearing these more often that just for running.

That's left me really frustrated, because if I want to wear some women's leggings or something, it wouldn't be acceptable, even if they looked like male items.


Second part, is that I text her about a weird dream I had the previous night (we didn't get to see each other before I left for work today), and explained part 1 was that she insisted on waxing my legs - I realized that was because I had physio tape on my leg that had pulled off in the night. It's basically like a waxing strip.

The other bit of my dream was that she had bought my diamond stud earrings and insisted I get into male jewellery.

Her response was "Blimey they're both very feminine" with a confused and questioning emjoi. She went on to say no to studs, but she'd be ok with a necklace. I said it felt like I was being judged, and she said I was being too sensitive.

Of course I'm sensitive - I'm not allowed to express any of my trans side in front of her, it's got to be hidden, and she's just called me out for having feminine dreams.

Honestly, am I being unreasonable for feeling like this?