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Thread: Uncomfortably Comfortable?

  1. #1
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    Uncomfortably Comfortable?

    With great respect, this post is aimed towards CDs rather than transwomen...

    Are women's clothing actually comfortable or are we just comfortable wearing women's clothing?

    Many of our posts maintain how comfortable/luxurious female garments are, and we often express our confusion as to why more GGs don't appreciate wearing high heels, tight dresses, bras, corsets, shapewear, hosiery, etc.

    Having said that, are these items truly comfortable or merely a comfort? Many of us are in a hurry to dress up in the very same articles of clothing that the majority of women are anxious to remove at the end of the day. Are Ladies somehow unaware as to the comfort factor of clothing that is designed for their own gender (physically and/or aesthetically), or are we simply embracing the desire to wear feminine clothes and convincing ourselves that these items are actually comfortable?

    As an example, I love wearing pantyhose. They are soft, silky, and feel amazing. However, I am cognizant of the fact that I still enjoy wearing a pair of hose that might be too tight, poorly made, or simply the wrong size. In other words, I can feel very comfortable even while wearing an uncomfortable pair of pantyhose. Sometimes the discomfort is actually a comfort - a constant reminder that I am wearing an article of women's clothing.

    Would you still wear a bra that digs in at the straps, heels that pinch, panties that ride up?

    Are you capable of being uncomfortably comfortable?

  2. #2
    Gold Member Helen_Highwater's Avatar
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    Cecile,

    Early on in my journey yes I would have put up with those things. The too small bra, shoes 2 sizes too small. It was a case of whatever I could acquire would have to do.

    Now, I know my bra size and shop according. Ditto shoes, dresses, tops, skirts, everything has to fit just so.

    As for uncomfortable, ladies generally haven't experienced spending all day in a hot office, no air con, and wearing a business suit. Give me the option of a sleeveless dress any day.

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    The last time I was actively uncomfortable because of the clothes I was wearing was when I was having dinner in Le Gavroche in London. They had a dress code there where men were required to wear shirts, ties and jackets. It was unnaturally warm and I was trussed up like a good'un. Nowadays, I would take the opportunity of wearing an appropriate dress and be far more comfortable. It's a two way street this question. Remember women have what is known as 'clothing freedom' and that means that discomfort never need be part of your day.

  4. #4
    Member Kris Burton's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Helen_Highwater View Post
    Cecile,

    Early on in my journey yes I would have put up with those things. The too small bra, shoes 2 sizes too small. It was a case of whatever I could acquire would have to do.

    Now, I know my bra size and shop according. Ditto shoes, dresses, tops, skirts, everything has to fit just so.

    As for uncomfortable, ladies generally haven't experienced spending all day in a hot office, no air con, and wearing a business suit. Give me the option of a sleeveless dress any day.
    Agreed Helen, and being more aware of my sizes has helped a lot. However, the wide variation in sizes does make things difficult. Although better, there is still a lot of stuff that gets sent back, or in the case of undergarments, never used. No reason for any of us to put up with ill fitting or uncomfortable clothing.

  5. #5
    The 100th sheep GaleWarning's Avatar
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    Panties are more comfortable to wear than men's underpants. Period.
    Blouses are more comfortable to wear than men's shirts. Period.
    Skirts are more comfortable to wear than trousers. Period.

    I prefer to wear a suspender belt and stockings over pantyhose, again, because I find them very comfortable to wear, especially with an eight strap belt which does not slip.

    Bras are tricky ... I own some which are very comfortable and others, not so!
    Likewise with heels.

    Overall, I feel much more relaxed and happy when wearing women's clothes.

  6. #6
    Aspiring Member MonicaPVD's Avatar
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    It seems to me that for some (or many) of us, there's a huge sensory/tactile component to crossdressing. The restrictive nature of bras, hose, girdles, etc is an attraction while most cis women run away from that in search of comfort. Hence, many US women's propensity to walk around in leggings and a sweatshirt looking like they just rolled out of bed.

    Personally, I love to suit up in the gear that shapes my body, even though it is terribly restrictive: panties or gaffe, waist cincher or corset, bodysuit that is usually a size too small, breastplate, bra, hose. All these contraptions not only give me a feminine figure, they make me hyper aware of every square inch of my body, and I love it even if it can be most uncomfortable over time.

    Don't even get me started on stilettos. ��
    Last edited by MonicaPVD; 10-22-2021 at 08:26 AM.

  7. #7
    Senior Member NancySue's Avatar
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    A definite ?Yes!? to both your second paragraph questions. And, another?Yes?, all my clothes are very comfortable. Through trial and error, over the years, I know my favorite styles, sizes and brands. Everything I own fits and I enjoy dressing daily. My supportive wife doesn?t understand how I can find underwire bras, hose, (I wear mostly thigh highs, but occasionally pantyhose), a form shaper, a must for my hip pads, and heels. Her favorite tease is, I can?t wait to put on, what she can?t wail to take off?oh how true. Would I wear a bra that digs in? Yes. I just bought a lovely, black underwire push-up bra. It initially dug in, but a little underwire adjustment solved the problem. Last, another ?absolutely?, I?m always comfortable. Never uncomfortable. Life is good.

  8. #8
    Junior Member JustJennifer's Avatar
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    There's good uncomfortable and there's bad uncomfortable. Like Monica says, there's a strong tactile component to this.

    That said, if something is uncomfortable because it doesn't fit, that totally takes me out of the moment and is unacceptable. That's probably why I've never been into underdressing. If I can feel it all day, it doesn't fit. I don't want to be reminded I'm wearing pantyhose only because the top has rolled down past my bellybutton.

  9. #9
    Exploring NEPA now Cheryl T's Avatar
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    Would I wear a bra that digs in...of course not, I'd buy the right size.

    I don't find my clothing uncomfortable at all. Of course I gave up corsets years ago, the rest of my wardrobe is quite comfortable. Yes, at times certain shapewear is needed, but that's not unlike other women and yes, at the end of the day it's a relief to be able to take it off.
    Let's reverse the question. Who finds it comfortable wearing a 3 piece suit all day in the summer? Who loves wearing a necktie all day? I'd much rather be wearing a pretty summer dress, with bare legs and heels and perhaps a little shapewear than be all bound up in a suit.
    Wear something pretty every day !

  10. #10
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    Based on observing my wife I can say women many times find women's clothing uncomfortable. Yep, shed the bra, especially on warm days. Out comes the loose sun dress. Or a sleeveless tee shirt. My wife favors cotton panties rather than nylon. Hair ties come out to pin her hair off her neck. Makeup? Forget it. She totally a creature of comfort.

    Me? Fortunately, I live in an area where temperatures in summer are normally moderate. Any temperature over 80 is a heat wave. Summer nights are cool. I only wear dresses. That's in my mind set. I have an attraction for the feel of nylon; panties and slips. No matter what time of year it's a dress (sundress to sweater dress) and nylon panty and slip. Hosiery of course, but, stockings attached to a garter girdle and not pantyhose. Shoes? It took awhile to find a comfortable brand, size and style. When I found them, I bought multiple pairs.

    In order to emulate a woman one does not have to truss themselves up in a waist cincher, hip and butt pads and don tons of makeup, especially in hot weather. I think it is rather obvious a woman can wear minimal clothing and still portray her womanhood. Most of us have to add a whole bunch of stuff to create an illusion of what we think we want to appear as. That being said I am sure someone is going to throw up a picture of himself in a one piece bathing suit with a nicely tanned body and longish hair. You'd be the exception.

  11. #11
    Rural T Girl Teri Ray's Avatar
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    Everything about dressing enfemme for me is as if not more comfortable than being in my drab clothes. The one exception for me is..............in my effort to achieve a certain look I do or wear things that might not be comfortable for long periods of time. A tight corset or certain high heeled shoes tend to get uncomfortable after time. I do use clip on earings that tend to get uncomfortable after several hours. I will also admit there are days where my wig feels tight on my head after time. Doesn't always happen but if it feels tight on my head I gotta get it off. Most of the things that get uncomfortable are of my own doing.
    Teri Ray Rural Idaho Girl.

  12. #12
    Life is more fun in heels Genifer Teal's Avatar
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    I can be comfortable in heels that may not be entirely comfortable. As reference my heels are all good. I can last at least 4 hours in them. None are really too uncomfortable.

  13. #13
    Girl Power! CrossKimmy's Avatar
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    A dress is much more comfortable than a pair of pants tbh.

  14. #14
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    Great topic Cecily, for me I'm definitely comfortable when dressed given that I wear beautiful/romantic lingerie & sleepwear to bed every night, so needless to say it's very comfortable and I always feel luxurious in it.

  15. #15
    NEVER go bare-legged! Kimberly A.'s Avatar
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    Hi, Cecily.
    Wow, I think you may've read my mind! LOL..... Seriously, a lot of times when I'm out en femme, I often think to myself, "I am uncomfortably comfortable with this". And the reason I think that is, not really because of the way women's clothes feel, (although I will talk more about that in this post, since you brought it up), it's because in the back of my mind I think, "I am a man, I shouldn't be doing this. I shouldn't be dressing and presenting as a woman in public. I've been taught that boys don't wear girls' clothes and vice-versa when I was growing up"..... As I'm sure most if not everyone here has been taught as well. But, it just feels like it's who I'm meant to be, not to be a woman 24/7, but to be a crossdresser and let out my feminine side that I feel has been hiding for all of my life.

    Also, "uncomfortably comfortable with this" is a quote from my favorite TV show, "Supernatural"...... It was in the first season, where the two main characters, Dean and Sam Winchester were, well, I won't go into details about that, but they had to do something to stop a ghost and they had a woman with them and she said, "You guys are uncomfortably comfortable with this"! ROFL Anyway, I just thought it was funny that you should bring up a quote that I've heard on that show. LOL

    But anyway, back to women's clothes being comfortable or uncomfortable on me..... Like you, Cecily, I love pantyhose and I wear them every waking moment and sometimes I sleep in them. But yes, even pantyhose can get a bit uncomfortable, especially if they're a little too small and too tight in the waist. Also, I've had bras that were too tight under my natural breasts and would dig into my sides and into my skin, I had to get rid of those bras. I've also had shoes that were too small and killed my feet, so I had to get rid of those as well. I don't like uncomfortable clothing, but who does? LOL But yes, of course I know that most GG's, even probably some CD'ers here will sacrifice comfort for fashion, which I will NEVER understand the reasoning behind that! LOL

    And with that said, I can understand now why GG's are often anxious to rip their uncomfortable clothes off, especially heels when they get home. I mean, if you're wearing clothes that are too tight, or that bind or pinch, or shoes that kill your feet then yeah, I'd wanna take them off as quickly as I could too! LOL..... But, I buy clothes and shoes that fit, so it's really not an issue for me.

    So as far as going out en femme, all dolled up, wearing a dress, or a top and skirt, or leggings and any of that with tights or pantyhose and women's shoes or boots, then yeah, I'm uncomfortably comfortable with it! As I've said before, it's like second nature to me now. LOL
    Last edited by Kimberly A.; 10-22-2021 at 03:50 PM.
    I may be crazy, but I'm BURIED in your memory!

  16. #16
    Silver Member Sometimes Steffi's Avatar
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    I have some panty briefs where I get the tactile sensation every step I take.

    I have other panty briefs that fit me so well, I almost feel like I'm wearing nothing at all. They are supremely comfortable,

    Like Monica, I kind of like being "trussed up" in a tight fitting high waisted girdle and other similar accoutrements. Sometimes I even wear two panties with butt pads to get more booty.

    One time I was feeling extremely comfortable in my dress. Instead of the girdle, padded panties, etc. I just wore a simple Hanes cotton high cut panty. I was amazed by how comfortable it was without all the body enhancements.
    Hi, I'm Steffi and I'm a crossdresser... And I accept and celebrate both sides of me. Or, maybe I'm gender fluid.

  17. #17
    Member Linda K.'s Avatar
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    I have a favorite pair of pantyhose I like to wear because of the color and it's ability to disguise imperfections in my legs. However, when I first put them on, they bunch up around the the top of my thighs and really dig in. I find that after using the restroom a few times during the day, the re-adjusting of the hose tends to put them perfectly where they should be, they quit digging in, and become very comfortable to wear. I guess I need to learn how to put them on right the first time.

    I also bought a bra with breast form pockets that was okay to wear all day but found it was so tight that it would leave impressions for days after taking it off. I purchased a package of bra extenders, about 3 inches long, and have been using those. Now I can't even tell I am wearing a bra and there are no impressions once I take it off. Kris and Helen are right, once you know your size it makes it easy to go for comfort.

  18. #18
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    Having thought about this question overnight, I concluded that, whether male or female, clothing can be uncomfortable but, more frequently, it is not so much discomfort as restriction or inapproptiateness that's the problem. Let me explain.
    Personally I don't regard wearing a man's suit and tie as uncomfortable - but it would be if I was sitting on a beach in the sun. Likewise, I don't find stockings or tights or bras uncomfortable but they, too, might feel uncomfortable out walking on a hot day.
    Looking more specifically at some items of women's clothing, there's no doubt in my mind (and experience) that because women have so much wider a choice of what to wear, there are bigger contrasts for women in what is comfortable in what circumstances and therefore a greater chance of an item of clothing proving or becoming uncomfortable in the course of a day's activities. How often have we heard women say their heels are comfortable but would find them anything but comfortable if they found themselves unexpectedly having to walk a long distance or cross a patch of wet grass.
    Most of the time, it's not so much discomfort as difficulty or limitation that we experience in women's clothing. I have some chunky-heeled (three inch) which fit well, have a secure strap and are perfectly comfortable to wear for long periods. But running in them would be near-impossible - and uncomfortable.
    A straight, tight skirt can be entirely comfortable but become inconvenient and restricting when trying to walk quickly or climb steep stairs. Even a wide, loose skirt can become a problem on a windy day and might be regarded as uncomfortable (i.e. I wish I hadn't worn it) as a result.
    Underwear is often cited as the cause of discomfort and obviously it can be. However, bras, belts and girdles, while tight (they generally have to be or they don't work!) are not necessarily uncomfortable. They might be restrictive without being uncomfortable. On the other hand, things can go wrong. For CDs, a long-line bra worn with a high-waist girdle can give a very good figure and, although tight, especially on a male waist, are seen as reasonably comfortable and worth the inevitable restriction. However, I can confirm that making the mistake of wearing an excellent and comfortable long-line bra but with a standard waist length girdle can quickly become very uncomfortable - painful even - when a gap appears and a roll of flesh is pinched tightly between the two garments. Taking either garment off might simply not be an option when away from home and the discomfort might then be almost unbearable.
    Suspenders are often described as uncomfortable or "a nuisance" but we learn to live with them and even enjoy how they feel - we just get used to them. Again, though, I can confirm that if you happen to be wearing a girdle that has suspenders right at the back (those with six suspenders, usually) sitting down on a hard chair or bench can suddenly be very uncomfortable and difficult to avoid. That situataion was very common in the days when most women wore those garments - and you can understand how pleased they were when tights came along and suspenders weren't needed. On a couple of occasions my girlfriend at the time released the back suspenders on her girdle before sittting down for a long time (cinema once, long car journey once) because her girdle was not as tight (uncomfortable) when sitting if the tension at the back was released.
    These examples suggest that it's more the variety of clothing styles and types worn by women that have the potential to cause discomfort than simply being "women's clothes" and it's the combination of circumstances and clothing that results in restriction or discomfort. But isn't that what makes those clothes so intriguing to men?

  19. #19
    Aspiring Member Brenda Freeman's Avatar
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    I have always found panties more comfortable than mens underwear. Love the look too. Pantyhose is very comfortable to me, bras are comforting for me,not comfortable for very long. a dress or well fitting skirt is very comfortable with hosiery. The clothes are also how I like to see my self, I look forward to dressing as a woman not so much mens clothes.

  20. #20
    Aspiring Member jenna116's Avatar
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    Fun question! One that I can't definitively answer. I have a lot of women's clothes that are very comfortable. Nice soft fabrics and cuts that aren't confining. I also actually enjoy the feel of a bra's soft embrace as it holds my forms to my chest. OTOH, I also enjoy going braless and the feeling of wearing my forms attached.

    Having said that about women's clothes, I will also say that most of my men's clothes are also comfortable. Being retired and living in central FL I'm in cargo shorts and t-shirt/polo's most of the time. Can't recall the last time I had to wear a tie (definitely uncomfortable) or jacket.

    Hows that for an equivocal answer.
    Jenn A --- nothing fancy, just me.

  21. #21
    AKA Lexi sometimes_miss's Avatar
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    It seems odd, that the very things we WANT to put on, are the very ones that women can't wait to take off. Bras, heels, etc..
    For us, perhaps it's psychological comfort which allows us to spend lots of time in clothing which women find restrictive or uncomfortable. Wearing female specific clothing, especially things which provide tactile constant sensations which we can't ignore that tell us that we're wearing girl clothes, can go far to rectify the gender identity dysphoria that makes male clothing only seem uncomfortable.
    How many absolutely love to wear bras? You know, that female specific garment which reminds us with every breath, that we're wearing 'woman stuff'. Stockings with garters, or pantyhose, which also require frequent adjustments, not to mention the cost of replacing them? Women hate that, but WE love it. Or panties that slide on our skin with every step? Heels which women can't wait to get out of, but WE can't wait to put on? Dresses which zip or worse, BUTTON up the back; we love it. The sensation of doing something so female specific, even when difficult or troublesome, is what we love. Oh, and make up? And shaving their legs? That, too, is something that women find to be a general PITA, but we actually enjoy it. Long hair is a maintenance nightmare, but women put up with it to look pretty, and many of us just love the feeling of long hair brushing against our neck, shoulders, arms and chest; not to mention the almost constant brushing it aside to get it out of our face?

    But we love all of that. All because it spells 'female' to us, and that's what we crave so much.

    JMHO.
    Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
    There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
    Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.

  22. #22
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    There are so many great comments in this thread. So many valid and thought provoking statements.

    For me personally, I really identified with both Monica and Sometimes Miss regarding their views on the exquisite sensory/tactile sensation of wearing women's clothing.

  23. #23
    Member Debs's Avatar
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    I wear what fits me these days, used to want to squeeeeeeze into that mini skirt or tight dress, found I can be just as fem in casual smart clothes, but maybe shorter skirt at night in the pubs, lol

  24. #24
    Senior Member Maid_Marion's Avatar
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    I got used to wearing boy clothes that fit poorly. Women's clothes fits me much better.

    I find some women's clothes to be uncomfortable at first, like thongs, but I've gotten used to wearing them.

    I go shopping in wedges or booties with 2 inch heels.

    Marion
    Last edited by Maid_Marion; 10-24-2021 at 06:04 AM.

  25. #25
    Member Lea's Avatar
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    Once I figured out sizes the only thing that that becomes uncomfortable on a regular basis is my wig. The wig after a few days will bother me. Part of the issue is the heat in the summer as I do not set my air conditioner very low and after wearing it for several days for twelve hours a day I will take it off during the day. I do not go out so I can take wig breaks.

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