Crossdresser wanting to change eating habits

[Nicolelicd]

I have read on this wonderful forum about other crossdressers having success in changing their eating habits. Please guide me with advice on how you did it and what worked for you. I have finally realized that I can not out run my diet. I would really like to go down a dress size and look more toned when wearing yoga pants and a sports bra. I am 5 foot 9 inches and weigh 180 pounds which I have been stuck at for a while. I generally eat healthy food but I tend to overeat, seconds and sometimes thirds! I am fairly active but the more I exercise the more I tend to eat. I usually try to have fruit and sometimes oatmeal for breakfast. I then try to have a piece of fruit before and after lunch. The problem for me is usually dinner and eating afterwards. I believe crossdressing motivates me to take better care of myself. I just want to see my abs again. Thank you all in advance and I love this forum!

Hugs,
Nicole

[Kris Burton]

Hi Nicole - This is one many of us can relate to. I think it would be wise to consult with your doctor before beginning any serious weight loss program. 5'9"/180 does not sound far off the mark, and from what I have seen people talking about here,we CDs have a tendency to have a distorted self image. We desire to have a slim feminine figure, but being men we do not, no matter how hard we try.
Having said that, there is certainly nothing wrong with getting in shape. It amounts to changing your eating and other habits, never a small task, but can yield rewards. You have mentioned some of the areas yourself - moderating portions, getting appropriate exercise, perhaps focusing on an area of concern (I remember your core was what you mentioned in your original post) and avoid snacking in between meals (that's my weakness). Don't forget to drink plenty of water - I found I lost several pounds just by doing this simple thing.
But do consult with your doc, you may be surprised by the advice you receive.

[Nicolelicd]

Great point Kris about consulting my doctor, he is a good friend so I will call him today. I understand and agree about the self distorted image we sometimes fantasize about. I am not looking to be a supermodel, hopefully just more toned. Thank you!

[Suranne]

Me, on social transitioning, I also changed my eating habits. It wasn't planned, it happened, probably as a result of being a happier more content me. All I did was started to eat less, a lot less. I started to have a proper healthy breakfast, I stopped eating vast amounts of carbohydrates, I more or less stopped drinking. I stopped snacking, eating cakes and biscuits as often as I had. For me, it wasn't hard, I think that it was because I was able to be the authentic me and I was, for the first time truly happy and content in being me. I started to exercise more. I dropped 5 dress sizes. Ok, it might not be easy for everyone, I get that, but it worked for me and so might work for you. This was some years ago now and I've maintained my new weight with no problems since.

[Maid_Marion]

I eat small quantities of really good food. Nice cuts of steak cooked to perfection. Fresh seafood.
Not expensive if you know how to cook.
Cakes, candy, but all in moderation. I weigh stuff when I buy it and separate it into single portions for cooking and eating.

I won't eat diet food. I drink Pu-erh, a fermented black tea, that I can drink without adding anything.
Soda and other sugar laden drinks can be loaded with carbs.

I found I had to exercise to get rid of the last three inches. My waist went from 28 to 25 inches.
I took up golf and bought a cute "Sunday Bag" to carry around the course with my feminine golf outfits. Usually with a stretchy body hugging pink top. My outfits flaunt my thin waist.

[kimdl93]

My advice is to be patient with yourself as you alter your behaviors. Moderate, but try not to go too extreme or you may not find the changes sustainable.

[Julie MA]

Nicole,

I started a thread called Which Diet?, that may help.

To summarize my initial response to your thread:
- Determine your calorie needs. Plenty of on line calculators for that
- Track what you eat. I use the MyFitnessPal app. Life changing
- 80% of wellness is diet. Exercise, sleep, hydration, flexibility, and mindfulness, make up the balance
- Avoid under eating, just as you avoid over eating

Julie

[Kelli_cd]

Changing one's diet takes effort.
Portion control is key.
Avoid the temptation to snack, especially between dinner and bedtime!
When that snacking urge happens, get up and walk around - but don't go to the pantry or the fridge! Just 5 minutes of walking can break the urge.
Now, I have to practice what I'm preaching. I need to lose a minimum of 18 pounds. After yest, I'm targeting another 20. It's all belly fat and it has to go!

[crobeson96]

My doctor told me I wasn't pre-diabetic but the trend over several years didn't look good. He told me to cut back on sugar. I did and lost forty pounds over about a year and a half.
My wife found all kinds of low-sugar or no-sugar foods to substitute but I found as I cut back the craving for sweets lessened which really helped - sugar is quite addictive and the food manufacturers exploit the fact and hook us when we're young.
At my doctor's suggestion, I borrowed "The Sugar Buster Diet" book from the library and read enough in a day or two to get me going. I never adopted any fixed regimen, I just cut back severely on anything containing sugar (there are fruits to avoid as well). I always look at the nutrition summary on the box and focus on "Added Sugars" - I try to keep any one food at 3g or less. You have to respect portion sizes as well to make this work - I used to eat half a sleeve of girl scout cookies at a time - now I limit cookies to two or three. It's amazingly easy once you get over the addiction.
Yes, there is "No Sugar Added" ice cream! All kinds of "No Sugar Added" cookies! Yes, these are more expensive but they do go on sale.
The doctor didn't even mention sugar at my last physical - he did tell me to lose another ten pounds LOL.
I don't miss anything I gave up and have no problem finding healthy alternatives when eating out. I don't have to avoid all sugar so the occasional slip up is fine.

[Trish]

I can't afford to gain or loose weight. I would have a closet full of dresses that I couldn't wear.

[JustJennifer]

Every person is different, but one thing that helped me was starting lunch and dinner with a big green salad. (Be mindful of the dressing too -- many are loaded with fats and sugars.) That tamps down my hunger in a low-calorie way so I can do smaller portions of everything else and still feel satisfied.

[Linda K.]

There are 3 things I know for sure.

1.) Eat in moderation. Eating to a point where you need to unbutton your pants, well then you ate too much. I try to eat just enough where the hunger pains subside. Sometimes I eat some trail mix when I get to work and the hunger goes away enough for me until I can sit down for my lunch.
2.) Get your metabolism going. I had a doctor that lived next door to me tell me to eat a little something in between meals to get my metabolism fired up. It could be something as simple as 4-5 grapes, an orange, or a handful of peanuts. This tells the body you have food on the way and starts the digestion process. It takes more calories to burn those few grapes and keeps the metabolism in gear when it's time for your meal. The longer you keep the metabolism up, the more calories you should burn. If you cut back on eating, like skipping a meal or two everyday, the metabolism shuts down and the body starts to store it in the body. The body goes into a preservation mode and reserves the calories you consume.
3.) Steer away from the carbs! I had a friend that lost 200lbs. I asked him how he did it and he said he just stopped eating bread. There are carbs in pretty much everything but remember, the body turns starchy foods into sugars which will get stored in the body somewhere. Bread, french fries, beans, all have a lot of carbs. Beer too!!

It is always suggested by every doctor I have met to eat green leafy vegetables and foods high in fiber. I remember learning in grade school about the 4 basic food groups. We have gotten away from those learnings. I think our diets should be balanced between these 4 groups, eaten in moderation (not super-sized), homemade, and no processed food that can be heated in a microwave. Fresh is the key!

Now I am in no means a doctor, these are just some learnings from over the years. Have they worked for me? To a point, but I am not ready to give up that beer yet!!!! My suggestion to you would be not only talk to your doctor about the diet, as Kris suggested, but a nutritionist or dietician as well. Your doctor may just refer you to one of these specialist. I hope you are successful in achieving your desired weight and let us know how it turns out.

[NancySue]

I hear you. Having tried every diet plan under the sun, the only one that works for me is a combination of discipline, food selection, portions and exercise designed to burn calories. Yes, it?s tough, especially in the beginning. Make a weekly plan of foods and exercise. Plan your work. Work your plan. When or if you fall off the wagon, don?t give up. Start over. Once you get to the first plateau, it gets easier. You?ll smile. As you reach a goal, reward yourself.

[docrobbysherry]

Eating and drinking r habits. Habits r hard to change. But, once u change to GOOD habits? Those r hard to change, too!

I'm 5' 9" and about 150 lbs. When I got serious about Sherry's figure here's what I did:

Switching from beer to red wine and immediately dropped 8 pounds in a few weeks!

Drink tea morning noon and nite. With lemon or straight. NO sugar!

Dinner is lean meat, salads, veggies, and fruit. Maybe a few spoon fulls of ice cream for desert. No bread, rice, potatoes or carbs. Never eat after 9 PM. A half gallon of ice cream lasts me a month. I don't buy cakes, cookies, sweets, etc.

I eat pretty much whatever I want for breakfast and lunch. A "diet" for me is salads for lunch and no deserts for a week. I can lose 5+ lbs. in that time!

I lost 25 pounds in 6 months to a year with those changes. That was 20 years ago and those pounds r still gone and I still eat that way. When I binge like I did the last week in Vegas and will over the holidays? I go on my "diet" above!

[RachelB.]

Weight loss is a matter of using more calories than you take in. You need to burn 3500 more calories than you take in. What helps me is keeping a food diary. This let's you know how many calories you are consuming. It really opened my eyes. There are several apps available to help you track your calories. Many help you track how many calories you are burning. Portion control is a huge part of losing weight and keeping it off.

[Nicolelicd]

Suranne, thank you for your advice. It is much appreciated and I will definitely start cutting back on the carbs. Congratulations on your transition!


Thank you Marion, I like your idea of eating small quantities of really good food. I?m so jealous of your waist size and golf outfits!


Yes Kim I will try not to go to extreme, that has always been a problem. Thank you for your advice,


Thank you Julie, I look forward to reading your thread.


Thank you Kelli, yes nighttime snacking is the killer. I really like the idea of getting up and moving around.


Thank you Crobeson96, I am going to try to cut back on sugar, oil and salt.


Very cute Trish, thank you!

Hugs to all,
Nicole

[Stephanie47]

I don't have much to add other than one recommendation. You said you go back for seconds and sometimes thirds. Thanksgiving aside, if you cook your own meals I'd cook only the amount for one portion. Yesterday I cooked a pot of meatballs and sauce with the intent of preparing for four meals for my wife and me. We ate small portions and then froze the remainder into individual meals. I figure, if I am going to cook and consume time, then I may as well spent a little more time up front and save time later. The key is not to take seconds and thirds. If you don't have any will power then only cook a small portion for the meal. Americans tend to eat the larger meals at supper time. In the old days (farmers) ate the larger meals when the energy was needed to work all day.

Also, dieting or not, read the darn ingredient labels. Watch the added sugars and salts. Stay away from corn syrups. I have found there are many products made with cane sugar right alongside the corn and high fructose corn syrups.

[Nicolelicd]

Thank you Jennifer, I love salads. I need to eat them more, great point!

Hugs,
Nicole

[Kitty Sue]

Good topic. I agree dressing can encourage me to lose weight. However, that is usually only when I am in a pink fog. When the fog lifts I no longer care as much about losing weight. When I want to lose weight I have found drinking lots of water helps as does working out in women's workout wear. I used to bike a lot and would wear women's riding clothing.

[Nicolelicd]

Wow Linda, thank you so much for all the great advice!!! Very much appreciated, I am thinking about starting to eat only Whole Foods which are plant based. I agree with everything you said, I especially like what you said about the metabolism and the old food groups.


NancySue, thank you and I agree. I tried too many diets, what I need is to change my eating habits. I appreciate the motivation from you and everyone else, as a result of this thread I ran 5 miles today.


Thank you Sherry, I remember reading something you posted a while ago about changing your eating habits. I could not find it and that is one of the reasons I started this thread.


Thank you RachelB, I will definitely try counting calories, I will probably scare myself.

Thank you Stephanie for your advice. I agree with you cooking extra. I am going to freeze what the extra portions. I used to always put the extra in big containers, I am going to try smaller ones.


Thank you Kitty Sue, I agree about the pink fog lifting! I am so jealous of you riding with female workout gear. I used to ride a lot but never in femme, maybe you just sparked some interest again!

Hugs to all,
Nicole

[Sometimes Steffi]

I've self developed a couple of diets for myself.

One was a version of the Atkins diet, which reduces car intake. I stopped eating bread and pasta. I would make up bag lunches to take into work with just the deli meat and no bread, and I got good deli meat, not the kinds filled with salt and fats (Boar's Head).

I out on about 10 lbs during COVID and WFH. I started cutting my meal portions down by about a half to two thirds, either by using a smaller plate or putting less on a big plate. And having fresh fruit instead of high calorie veggies like potatoes

[Pumped]

All the advice in the world will not help, unless you do something for yourself.

You need to cut back portions,
You need to cut back on sweets,
You need to cut back on carbs....

Do you see what I am getting at?

I could go on. The hardest part of dieting is changing the way you eat. As far as I am concerned you can eat just about anything you want, but you need to control portions. Cutting way back on sweets, and carbs helps a bunch eating a salad once a day helps. Too much salad dressing hurts.

I have mentioned it here before, but three years ago I was 5'10" and 205 pounds. I didn't like how I looked so I decided it was time. Also my doctor told me I should lose some weight. If you look at BMI charts 5'10" comes in around 155 pounds. I am shooting for 165. At 5'9" your BMI is probably around 150, so 160 would be a good number. BMI is a bit weird, as some people are just wider and heavier framed that others, but it is a place to start.

My wife does the grocery shopping and I told her no more ice cream, potatoes and potato chips in the house. I also started dishing up smaller portions and no more second helpings. No more french fries at lunch. No soda pop, well at least not every day, maybe once a week. My wife makes bowls of salad for our evening meals. She does this Sunday and has the salads dished up and covered, ready to go for every day.

Do more "Push aways" from the table.

What ever I am doing it is working, slowly, and I am fine with that. The other morning I hopped on the scale and I was at 172 pounds so a bit over 30 pounds in three years.

Loosing weight is simple, eat less calories than you burn.

Doing it is the hard part.

I know a guy that taped up a picture of some well built man on his mirror in the bathroom, and another on the refrigerator. He said it help inspire him to lose weight. He knew he would never look like the guy in the picture, but he could get a lot closer than he was when he started.

I wish there was some magic I could show you, but you need to decide and also change you habits.

Maybe do one step at a time. No more ice cream. When you get used to that, not more snacks. When you get used to that, drop something else. Think about what you are doing when you are dishing up. IMO, I did it slow and it was easier than trying some drastic measures. Many people drop everything, eat rabbit food and try run a couple miles a day and get discouraged because it is so restrictive.

[Linda K.]

Nicole - I agree completely with what Pumped said, control the carbs and eat green leafy vegetables. I had this book back in the late 80's written by Dr. Robert Haas called "Eat to Succeed." It has a lot of diet information to help you achieve what you are looking to do. It is still available today, just Google it. If I remember right, it has a 28 day menu plan that helps you get on track. Portion control and carbs are the main focus of the book. Check it out, it is a great read.

[Natalie5004]

I joined WW last week. I have done that before and been successful in dropping 25 lbs. I am sure I will do it again. I am off to a great start.

[Wendy me]

At one point i was getting quite large i was 198 pounds nouthing fit me i was getting out of controll i stopped eating during the day time 1 coup of coffee no sugar water during the day a good meal with veggies no bread snacks portions controlled at night now i weigh 145 i fit in a size 8 and i love how my cute feminine things look on me i also did the weight loos for my back i collapsed my L3 had sugary couldn't be happer