My Jekyll and Hyde life

[Tina Samoan]

If you come out to your wife and you want her to accept her/you.
Be prepared to answer some questions which usually starts out as Are you gay?
Have thoughtful and truthful answers for how you feel. Mum I don't know will lead to a longer more difficult journey to acceptance.

[sometimes_miss]

You will read all the success stories here, and the 'sort of' okay results where wives tolerate the crossdressing SO, but I'd argue that this isn't the case most of the time. Otherwise, you'd have plenty more crossdressers who aren't single.
As mentioned, consider the absolutely worst case scenario that can occur, and plan for it; if you can accept the worst possible outcome, then proceed, but be prepared for it, such as making sure you have some money hidden away, and some extra clothes in a locker or at a friend's house, because she might drain your bank accounts and cancel all your credit cards. She may burn all your clothes, maybe your car, change the locks in your house, make up a fake story about you assaulting her, get a restraining order against you so you can't go anywhere near her or your house or your kids if you have them. She may call in and report your car stolen, and then you'll have to prepare for being arrested and being put in jail and all that involves, including having to pay for your car being towed and getting it out of impounding. She may put drugs in your car as well, then you will have a felony record. She may out you to your friends, your work, your family, and if she has any pictures of you dressed up or you have them on your computer, she may find them after she locks you out, and post them on the net somewhere.
Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.

And when you destroy the man who your wife thought that you were, the love can soon follow, and leave a furious woman who may believe that you have ruined her life. And she will want to take out her anger, on YOU.

If you're okay with that, then proceed.

I had gone over it many times, and each time, believing that all the good things about me would easily out weigh my being a crossdresser. Then one night, I accidentally left a slip out; wife thought I had been having sex with another woman; I had only seconds to decide to take the chance that she would forgive that, or tell her the truth. I went with the truth.

Wrong move. Did she ever accept me as a crossdresser?

NOPE.

An excerpt from by bio in the writer's forum here:

For most of my life, I hoped that being good in every other way that I could, would be enough for a woman to overlook the crossdressing. When I had to tell my wife, I had already gone through it in my mind a thousand times, with an acceptance being the end result, no matter what else I would have to do for her to accept me. I had convinced myself that it really wasn't all that important in the grand scheme of things, that it would be just another one of the little things that a wife puts up with about a husband she loves. I was so, so wrong. At the time, I didn't understand why people fell in love, and how we create a 'profile', an image if you will, of the person we fall in love with, and actually fall in love with that image. Any drastic alteration of that image, and the love and attraction to it can easily be lost. Giving my ex a replacement image not of a masculine man, but of a feminine person instead, sealed my fate. Any attraction she had for me, was gone. It was over the moment I came out to her. Three years of seeing a psychologist together did nothing, and I knew it was over the moment she told the therapist that had she known about my female proclivities, she never would have married me.

My whole story is in the writers section of the forum; the link is in my sig, below.

Good luck. You're going to need it.