Have read much here, but barely ever posted. But I had to share this small thing.

My wife and I have a very strong relationship, but up and down (of course) with the CD thing. It has been a topic in our relationship for the past few years, with some small acceptance, usually followed by a period of non-acceptance, and back and forth. She has not cared what I do on my own time, but sharing in this has been difficult. For me, I?m tired of hiding or being alone with it, without my best friend. Of course, I understand what a hard subject it is, and can be. I?m sure most wives never accept it, even a little.

But a couple of months ago, we had a real breakthrough getaway weekend where magically, it all seemed light, easy to talk about, and even fun. She bought us matching panties out of the blue. She encouraged me to go shopping while she went to the spa. The next day we had a laughing, great time where I put on a fashion show for her in our hotel room, and I felt more free than I ever had. It was a monumentally good time.

Since then, she has made a few positive comments about it, saying how cute I looked, but there haven?t been any ?dress up? times. On Friday, I told her that I really was feeling a need for another time to express that side of myself, before the holidays came with family, obligations, trips, etc. I was very open and honest, but she seemed to kind of take a deep breath, almost like a ?what have I done?? kind of expression.

We had a very busy weekend with friends and a concert, and this afternoon she broached the subject she knew was on my mind. She said ?I know you want to have your time today, but I?m just exhausted and I don?t think I?m really into it.?

I was 100% expecting the usual ?I?m fine if you want to take some time for yourself without me?, which I was okay with, but a little disappointed. BUT - instead, she said, ?I?m not sure I can be your cheerleader today, but what if we postpone it until tomorrow? I won?t be as tired, and I just think it would be more fun then.?

Wow - how lucky am I? Still taking it day by day, but I sure do love my wife.