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Thread: Does she really like it??

  1. #1
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    Does she really like it??

    So my SO has moved in and I could no longer hide my dressing. Just panties at first, with her acceptance it became bras and panties. I would sleep in them so it wasn't hidden from her. Over the past year it has advanced to dresses and hoses etc. It has even advanced to me coming home to find a new dress in my closet and panties in my drawer. Our intimate times have increased even when I'm dressed .. I'm not complaining by any means.. But has anyone else have this happen? Should I question her about her feelings or should I just be thankful and let things just be??

  2. #2
    Senior Member Laura912's Avatar
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    You should be asking her those questions and not us. In flying the rule when something goes wrong is aviate, navigate, communicate. In the CD world with a SO, it is communicate, communicate, communicate.

  3. #3
    Rural T Girl Teri Ray's Avatar
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    Yup what Laura said
    Teri Ray Rural Idaho Girl.

  4. #4
    Aspiring Member DanielleDubois's Avatar
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    Don't assume anything and communication is essential. Years ago my wife was comfortable seeing Danielle in person and photos. Turned out after a discussion years later she wasn't comfortable and was doing it for my sake and to try and be accepting. She is still understanding and we can talk about almost anything Danielle related but she does not want to see her husband looking and behaving so differently as Danielle.

  5. #5
    Silver Member Sometimes Steffi's Avatar
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    It happened to me also, but then I woke up from the dream. Does that count?
    Hi, I'm Steffi and I'm a crossdresser... And I accept and celebrate both sides of me. Or, maybe I'm gender fluid.

  6. #6
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    This is why i ask jere first, you all have been through this more than I have.. I'm not looking for you to tell me what to do but to tell me of your experience so I can decide whats best for me to do.

  7. #7
    Super Moderator char GG's Avatar
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    What you are doing is the Drip, drip, drip method. Panties, then hose, then bra, then wig, adding things little by little. This sometimes backfires because it keeps the SO off balance until she reaches her saturation point (if there is one). She never knows what will be next.

    As others have said, talk to her. Really make sure she is comfortable with that drip drip method and listen to her responses. She may not mind at all. However, in my case, I wanted an end point. (How far will this go type response.) So?. Ask her.

  8. #8
    GG Dutchess's Avatar
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    I was the same as Danielle's wife . I did all that out of fear or being labeled as bigoted or whatever and because I became afraid he would leave me if I did not . I put up a good front but that wasn't me. It finally totally took over our relationship . It was all we did and talked about and finally it became too much . Sex was impossible unless he was dressed .
    We are no longer together .
    IG : Knightress Oxide

  9. #9
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    Thanks Char and Dutchess, I think what confuses me the most is why would she be adding garments to my wardrobe? Out of fear of losing me? We have talked about things I have answered open and honestly, (she Is the only other person other than this group that know I dress) I have told her I am willing to suppress this if it keeps me from losing her.

  10. #10
    Administrator Di's Avatar
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    Why does she keep adding things to your wardrobe? Because she loves you and wants you to know she accepts you. But please like everyone has told you Communicate with her. Tell her how much it means to you but ask if she has any boundaries. What Char and Dutchess are saying so many GGs tell us they wanted to show love and support but the CD took it as a green light and it completely took over their life . Being all they thought, talked about . Just talk and be open with her . I did the same things bought things for Sherlyn to show love and acceptance but also we discussed everything. If there would be something that I did not like I voiced it and she did the same . We talked, shared and was on the same page . So asking here you can get all kinds of answers because we do not know your partner.

  11. #11
    Senior Member Kris Burton's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ricky Rayne View Post
    I think what confuses me the most is why would she be adding garments to my wardrobe? Out of fear of losing me?
    Well, I wouldn't complain about the first one, who among us would not welcome such a thing. But if you think she might fear losing you, that is something you should talk about and reassure her in no uncertain terms that she should not worry about that. Keep them lines of communication going, yet try not to overdo the topic.

  12. #12
    Gold Member alwayshave's Avatar
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    Ricky, My wife does not necessarily like the fact that I cross dress, but she supports me because she knows it is important to me. So your SO may not like it, but may like and support you.
    Please call me Jamie, I always_have crossdressed, I always will, "alwayshave".

  13. #13
    Senior Member Kris Burton's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ricky Rayne View Post
    I have told her I am willing to suppress this if it keeps me from losing her.
    I'm not sure you can suppress the CD impulse indefinitely.

  14. #14
    Silver Member NancySue's Avatar
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    Echo Laura and Kris. Communicate, discuss, open dialogue, answer questions, not ask. Sounds like she?s on board. Suppression never works. Yes, be thankful. Treat her well.

  15. #15
    Member Vale's Avatar
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    She is working hard to understand your needs and see that they are met. Could you work equally hard to learn to understand her needs and see that they are met? Please try. .. .. vale

  16. #16
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    I do agree with the others who suggest talking to her about this progression. It is one thing for the guy to nudge cross dressing along to the woman's "saturation point" and then have everything explode. Why is she nudging it along? I'd reflect and think back to the beginning; panties. The end game; wig, makeup, dresses, heels and hosiery. A total transformation? Then what? She wakes up and it's all over? All this could also mean she is testing you to see how far this will all go and then wham! Bye, bye. Talk to her.

  17. #17
    Member Teresa.Smith.VA's Avatar
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    As one who has the full support and participation of my wife, I can attest to the advice given by Di and others, that communication is vital, even though you may not fully understand you’re need to crossdress.

    Good communication was the key to her understanding of my continuous need to add “just one more thing” in my attempt to satisfy my CD’ing needs or to improve my chances of passing in public. There were bumps in our journey but they were discussed openly and accommodations, compromise, and change occurred.

    Having said that, I also believe that even with good two way communication, a critical factor for most wives is that they have a satisfying relationship with their husband. I found that the more I focused on being a great husband, the more my wife focused her love on meeting my needs in every way, not just in CD’ing.

    When one partner’s highest priority is focused on the satisfaction and love for their partner/SO/spouse, it’s more likely that acceptance and support can be the outcome.

    Summary: Make your wife's happiness your first priority and communicate, communicate, communicate.
    Fact: Some members can never post pictures in their feminine finery to support their stories and experiences. Please be understanding and kind.

  18. #18
    Member Gi Gondin's Avatar
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    Ricky, she is the only one that could answer the question you asked.

    I asked the same question too many times to my girlfriend. Stopped making them after became clear that my CDing is something very important to our relationship, that I should not be embarrassed and we should develop this together. I guess I mentioned before that nowadays she is the one asking me to put heels, lingerie and dresses most of the time.

    It took years to get to this point, but as the other said, talk, talk, talk.

  19. #19
    Member Cassiek's Avatar
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    If the door is open try not to close it. Communicate communicate communicate!!!

  20. #20
    Senior Member Read only Allison Chaynes's Avatar
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    Although it has been pretty well covered here, I would just say that Everywoman is different and there's no blanket answer here. I would ask her how she really feels about it, I don't think it hurts to know the truth. It's possible she could be going along with it because she knows you enjoy it. But you never know, it could grow on her, and she could actually start to like it. This has been my experience with my wife, it started out as OK I'll go along with a slight fetish, but then it grew, and it's kind of growing on her to where she is actually kind of into it now. But she can be a little bipolar about it at times, which I perfectly feel like is to be expected and understandable.
    Life is too short to be boring.

  21. #21
    Aspiring Member LIKETODRESS2's Avatar
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    Myabe is her way of say8ng she loves and suppors you

  22. #22
    Reality Check Krisi's Avatar
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    It would be wise to talk about this with her. Just bring it out into the open so you each know where the other stands and what to expect.

    If she bought you panties and a new dress, that's a good sign but you should still discuss it.

    [SIZE=1]- - - Updated - - -[/SIZE]

    It would be wise to talk about this with her. Just bring it out into the open so you each know where the other stands and what to expect.

    If she bought you panties and a new dress, that's a good sign but you should still discuss it.

    Note to moderators: I did not intentionally post this twice, there seems to be a problem with the website. It took a long time to post and a message popped up asking if I really wanted to leave.
    Krisi

  23. #23
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    I hope you thank her everytime she gets you something. Her response should tell you a lot.

  24. #24
    Member Julia B's Avatar
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    Appreciate her for appreciating you.
    My SO is often buying wonderful clothing, jewelry, and such for
    me. She loves seeing me happy, knows my Julia side is important, and she enjoys being with my Julia side.
    She wants to see me proud of who I am. Am I am proud of who I am.
    We often overthink things on this site. Appreciate what you have and be happy.

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