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Thread: What do you get out of it? Or how did you find it out?

  1. #26
    Platinum Member alwayshave's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
    Washington, DC
    Pixie, I don't know why I like to dress, but I "always have." I have long ago accepted that this is who I am. My dressing does not hurt anyone and when dressed, I am my most comfortable.
    Please call me Jamie, I always_have crossdressed, I always will, "alwayshave".

  2. #27
    Senior Member April Rose's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2017
    Short answer; This is about emotion and sensuality. Looking for a logical explanation is a waste of time.

    Longer answer: when I was young I was an enthusiastic Motorcycle racer. This involved spending most of my weekly salary, and almost all for my freetime, hours of labor on the bike, hundreds and hundreds of miles of driving, supply problems, often a good deal of pain and discomfort, and even girlfriend problems all so I could line up with a bunch of other guys and we could ride around in a circle over and over trying to be the first one back to exactly where we started from. The vast majority of us would be unsuccessful even at this. We would go home disappointed, vowing to do better the next time. Looked at from an objective point of view, this makes no sense at all.

    Even at 71 I still ski. A lot of money to pay to ride up to the top of a hill so you can labor your way down so you can ride up again so you get the point. Golf? Football? Bowling?...nothing is going to suck the joy out a passion faster than trying to logically defend it. It is about how you feel, and chasing that feeling is everything, and it needs not be defended.

    Crossdressing is rarer, I suppose and so subject to more scrutiny. But you are not responsible for answering or justifying that scrutiny. You will be happier if you can just love what you love and realize that nobody else's passions make any more sense than yours do.
    I am a vessel of the goddess. Let me express my calling to a feminine life through nurturing love and relatedness.

  3. #28
    Gold Member Helen_Highwater's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Midlands UK
    Isn't it a bit like asking to explain why your favourite colour is your favourite. Some things we're drawn to and we're never sure why. I know I've been drawn to wearing femme things all my life and now having progressed in my dressing over many years if I have to give a answer to what do I get out of it that'd have to be it allows me to express myself as the type of person I am.

    Like others I've give up trying to analyse the whys, and concentrate more on the doing and improve my presentation. What I do know is me in a skirt feels so natural and allows me to express myself at the same time.
    Who dares wears Get in, get out without being noticed

  4. #29
    Aspiring Member KimberlyJean's Avatar
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    Mar 2012
    Peace and contentment, when I am dressed everything from the clothes to interactions with others feels right.

  5. #30
    Struggler with CDing Pixie_94's Avatar
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    Aug 2017
    Costa Rica
    Thank you to everyone who has replied to my thread! I'm still unable to come out with a response not too similar to what I'd usually say, but I can say that what all of you have commented here may be helpful to me. I even had a chuckle about what some of you mentioned about golf, for how accurate it objectively is, but yeah, what I can say is that I know that something one can get from any men's section of a clothing store, no matter if it's the same material as something from the women's section, it would not be the same for me, the aesthetic is a big part of it to me, even when I was still not exactly fit. Anything I used to get for myself was either cute or colourful, ornate in general.

    Quote Originally Posted by KimberlyJean View Post
    Peace and contentment
    Okay, that one sounds nice. I like it.

  6. #31
    Member Read only MiniRock's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2018
    Wien (Vienna)
    Quote Originally Posted by Paulie Birmingham View Post
    An erotic experience. A kind of foreplay if you will.
    I'm with Paulie. It's a turn on.

  7. #32
    Aspiring Member Lacey New's Avatar
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    Oct 2012
    At first it was an instantly sexuallly exciting experience. Now, as Pauline answered, if is more like enjoyable foreplay.

  8. #33
    Aspiring Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Yes, since I have progressed to being able to pass.I love being pretty.
    It's true I can go unnoticed. Even at sometimes having a door held for me or being called mam

    [SIZE=1]- - - Updated - - -[/SIZE]

    I love being Kendra Sue, it is so relaxing. I am in no hurry to get out of my dress, panties,bra .I am comfortable in my own skin.

  9. #34
    Aspiring Member fun4metoo2004's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    DFW Texas
    Initially it was a sexual turn on for me. then as I grew older I figured out that it makes me happy. I like the feeling of the clothes, the makeup when on point, the feel of wearing a sexy pair of high heels and the sound that it makes when walking in them. I also get a kick out of those that were unable to figure out I was a guy under all that stuff.

    My next step as I hate shaving is Electrolysis. I have been getting waxed from the brows down and although it is lite hair now. My face still needs it too often.

    Good question

  10. #35
    🌺🌸🌻🌸🌺🌸🌻🌸🌺 Patience's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2018
    I am part of everything.
    Congrats on the by now not so new job. Hope it's going well.

    For me, it's a form of relief from the pressure of having to be so "macho" all the time, an element of which is the feeling one must be constantly serious.

    All I can say is crossdressing brings me an inner peace I can't seem to get from anything else. Also, I find that paradoxically I get treated better in some settings when I'm enfemme. In a weird way, it's almost safer than being a black male in America. Go figure.
    When haters hate, I celebrate!

  11. #36
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2022
    It?s a very liberating experience with me. With the daily grind of family and work, it?s a good way to blow off steam.

  12. #37
    Member AmeeJo's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2022
    Central Valley, CA
    It's definitely a way to get in touch with my feminine side. It is a huge turn on and it makes me feel pretty. I really enjoy feeling pretty.

    Oh and I started when I was 12. I'm 54 now.
    Last edited by AmeeJo; 02-24-2022 at 08:20 PM. Reason: Did you mistakenly quote your own post in this post?

  13. #38
    Junior Member Marsha Louise's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2022
    Maine USA
    For me, crossdressing adds a new dimension to my sense of self and opens up the opportunity to experience the world and life itself through the senses of another person, namely Marsha Louise. Like most who have posted here, I get real comfort and satisfaction from dressing up in traditionally female clothing and accessories, and have no idea why. I like what I see, and it just feels right.

  14. #39
    Member Mackem Sue's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2019
    North East England
    Quote Originally Posted by alwayshave View Post
    Pixie, I don't know why I like to dress, but I "always have." I have long ago accepted that this is who I am. My dressing does not hurt anyone and when dressed, I am my most comfortable.
    Agreed. There's no easy answer for me.

    I've been doing since my early-to-mid teens, so that's a good 40 years for me.

    I do feel happier and more complete when I do it.


  15. #40
    Senior Member Heather76's Avatar
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    Jan 2022
    Coastal SC
    Quote Originally Posted by Sometimes Steffi View Post
    I kind of think about like golf, a hobby that's much more acceptable than crossdressing.

    Why would someone chase a little white ball all over the place, from one side of the fairway to the other. For the reward of hitting it long and straight down the center, and then again, and putting a whole series of these together to get a good score at the end.
    I do them both (CD and golf) for the same reason. I enjoy doing them both.

    What do I get out of it? I'm really not certain; but, being at peace with myself comes to mind. But, that could well be a copout as I've always thought I was at peace with myself even before I started dressing. All I know is I am extremely comfortable wearing women's lingerie and clothing. I believe if CDing were 100% acceptable by everyone, I would rarely, if ever, wear men's clothing.
    It's never too late to enjoy a happy childhood.
    Live each day as though it's your last 'cause one day you'll be right.
    I'm finding the more feminine side of me...and I ❤️ this adventure.

  16. #41
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2021
    Quote Originally Posted by Helen_Highwater View Post
    Isn't it a bit like asking to explain why your favourite colour is your favourite. Some things we're drawn to and we're never sure why. I know I've been drawn to wearing femme things all my life and now having progressed in my dressing over many years if I have to give a answer to what do I get out of it that'd have to be it allows me to express myself as the type of person I am.
    Long Reply Alert
    Helen's answer seems to resonate best for me. I started very young, and not under the best of conditions. As I was reading all of the posts one thing that struck me is that we are all at different stages in our dressing and our needs to do so. Developmentally in my crossdressing is not at all near my chronological age. I went through my highly sexualized reasons for dressing. The lure of sexy and lacy lingerie that created to me the illusion then of what I thought was femininity. Then moving into times of wearing short dresses and high heels again brought out the lure of sexy and of maybe being desired. That then gravitated to my current stage of what is comfortable for me and what I really see many GG's wearing. I feel the only way you can even have a clue as to how to dress like a women is to pay attention to the GG's that are doing it everyday. I like cute blouses and skinny jeans (although I am not that skinny), skirts and dresses that are appropriate for a women of my age. I have moved from the Stiletto heel to enjoy flats and 2 to 3 inch heels. However, I still enjoy wearing sexy bra's and panty sets under all of those things including my male clothing. I do not get to dress fully very often. So underdressing has now allowed me to explore more of my desire to dress. I do enjoy what it looks like when I scoop the breasts that I already have lifting and pressing inwards to create a cleavage and even the bounce that I feel as I walk down the hall at work. I have always been the binge and purge crossdresser. Alluding to my own pathologizing of why I enjoy dressing as I do, and why no matter how hard I have attempted to be rid of this, it always finds itself back into my life. I believe this is what has prevented me from maturing as a crossdresser. Without generalizing a women moves through natural stages in her dress and as she matures her style changes. This is accepted by our society and they can be just as comfortable and as accepted in frumpy jeans and a sweatshirt as a dress and heels. Our plight is far different. We struggle for acceptance not only from society but also in many times the very persons that we trust and love the most. Which brings me to my reason for being a part of this forum. Here I feel a natural acceptance that I am unable to get anywhere else. Which is mostly what I am seeking to get from my experience now in my life.

  17. #42
    Exploring NEPA now Cheryl T's Avatar
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    Feb 2006
    Northeast Pa near NJ and NY
    I searched for decades for The Reason.
    It was always elusive and finally I gave up the search. The only thing I can definitively say is that it makes me feel real. I feel that I am who I am supposed to be and surely who I am most comfortable being. I never really felt at ease as a male and dressing always gave me that peace. It was as if I was home. I struggled through things always trying to fit in as a man, always trying to find where I was supposed to be and never could. That feeling always came when I would dress.
    I don't wear women's clothes, I wear MY clothes !

  18. #43
    Platinum Member kimdl93's Avatar
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    Jan 2010
    A bit south of the 49th!
    Cheryl nailed it.

  19. #44
    Senior Member Karen RHT's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2015
    Niagara Region, Ontario, Canada.
    Sense of accomplishment, overcoming obstacles big and small, enjoying the moment, that's what I get out of it. Call me weird, but I like to take roads less travelled, acquire new skills, explore, and discover.


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