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Thread: What would you do differently, if anything if you knew 20 years ago what you know now

  1. #51
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    It would go back more than 20 years, but I was dating a nurse from a big city who was hinting around she wanted to see me en femme and do a drag show in her gay neighbors apartment they every so often.

    I would have let her do any old thing she liked dressing me up.

  2. #52
    Silver Member CynthiaD's Avatar
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    I’d have to go back 60 years. I’d tell my 13 year old self:

    1. Don’t ever drink alcohol. (I’m a recovered alcoholic).
    2. Don’t ever smoke.
    3. Wear a dress every day.

    Number 3 would not have been possible though. Actually I would probably go for a much longer explanation, like: you’re female. You’ve always been female, and always will be. It’s the best part of you. You can’t do anything about it now, but the time will come when you can. When that time comes, embrace it and be proud.
    What do I do on days when I don't crossdress? I have no idea.

  3. #53
    Member Lisa Gerrie's Avatar
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    Twenty years ago? "Save time, just get divorced now."

  4. #54
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    What's the old joke? "Why get married? Just find someone you hate and buy them a house"

  5. #55
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    I would also have to go back more than 20 years and in reality would not want a do over as I am somewhat happy where I am.

    What I think about a lot is that when I first got caught dressing by Mom at 5 years old I should have continued to dress and get caught until they gave in. It would have been tough for a while but I think if I had helped with housework and other chores she would have accepted me as the girl she never had.

  6. #56
    Aspiring Member
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    I would have to go back 30 years ago and have found a different woman to marry. Been married for 29 years now and in DADT. There was one point when i got to dress in the open, but that was at least a decade ago. Yes, i did not disclose my cd to my wife at the beginning. I would find a woman who would accept me as a cd.

  7. #57
    Member 1Ladyjade's Avatar
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    The only thing I would do differently is find a partner that would support my CD. I thought I did. When she was young she was known as the fag hag. She only hung out with gay people. I didn't know my urge to CD would come back as strong as it has. So I never asked her. I shaved my legs cause I wanted to get pictures of myself in femme. She threw a fit. Said she hated the feeling of my bare legs. She said she knows she is definitely not lesbian. So I still have work to do to get her to support my CD. Until then I have a friend that has given me an outlet for my desire to be dressed femme. My cloths and make up are in her house. I have a key and any time I feel the need to dress I can drop in and put on Jade.

  8. #58
    Aspiring Member Lacey New's Avatar
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    Oh well, I think we all look back at our lives and think of points where we woulda, shoulda, coulda done things differently and I guess in my imagination, things might have been better. But I don't and will never know. The only thing that I might have done differently would have been to exercise a little more discretion in purging. Who knew that you would not be able to buy a nice garter belt or garter stockings in a departments store? Or that Vanity Fair would stop making nice floral print briefs? I could go on and on.

  9. #59
    Life is more fun in heels Genifer Teal's Avatar
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    Do everything sooner! I think we're going to see a lot of this sentiment here. When we're young the Fountain of Youth is overflowing. What we don't see is all the youth being wasted. We need to make the most of it while we can.

  10. #60
    Aspiring Member
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    20 years ago I wouldn't have deluded myself into believing that I would no longer be crossdressing in 20 years...

  11. #61
    Paula Paula_56's Avatar
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    I would have tried living as a woman, began transition.

    Deep down I think I would have been happier and more complete living as a woman and a wife

  12. #62
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    20 years ago I was a kid lol but I don't think I'd change or do anything differently, really happy how my life and CD'ing has worked itself out over the years. I'm in a good place and have been.

  13. #63
    Junior Member julia.bowie's Avatar
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    I'd do everything different!

  14. #64
    Senior Member Linda K.'s Avatar
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    I would bet heavily on all the Super Bowl winners!!

  15. #65
    Member Felicia M's Avatar
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    Oh my.....twenty years ago I was just about to leave a long-term relationship and was single for the first time in many years. I have often thought about that time frame looking back. I found myself in a new city with a new career, absolutely no friends and an enormous amount of free time on my hands. I would give anything to go back to that point and do it over again.
    I would have done almost everything differently.

    • I would have gotten a full professional makeover immediately to get a real sense of how to transform myself
    • I would have purchased a full makeup kit. I purchased some makeup at the time (and of course purged it after I started dated another woman full time) but knowing what I know now I should have purchased everything I could get my hands on lol!
    • I would have purchased and tried on as many outfits and shoes as I could possibly get my hands on and I would have went to the actual store to make sure of sizing and style
    • I would have gone out as Felicia to LGBTQ friendly spots as often as possible
    • I would have dated both men, women and t-girls to explore more of my sexuality
    • I would definitely have considered transitioning

    It has been a life altering experience to figure all of the things above that I should have done then almost exactly twenty years later. Life has a way of doing that to you so I can look back now and know what might have been but also realize it was not to be. I love what my life has become but there is no question my life would be profoundly different if I had could go back to that time frame and had the opportunity to do it over again.
    I have been circling for a thousand years,
    and I still don?t know if I am a falcon, or a storm,
    or a great song.

    Rainer Maria Rilke
    https://www.flickr.com/people/170325405@N05/

  16. #66
    Silver Member Natalie5004's Avatar
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    Well it would have to be over 40 years ago for me.

    2 words: Marriage knee

    If I knew then what I know now my live would or at least should have been very different.

  17. #67
    Platinum Member Beverley Sims's Avatar
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    Knowing what I know now I would have continued the hormone treatment that was prescribed for quite a different ailment.
    Work on your elegance,
    and beauty will follow.

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