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Thread: Privacy gone, for now.

  1. #1
    Member StacyG's Avatar
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    Privacy gone, for now.

    My wife and I split in December so I've been enjoying dressing up and being able to wear what want around the house and in the back yard. I enjoyed my evenings, taking a hot shower and slipping into a nightgown and relaxing on the couch and waking up in the morning and walking out into the back yard in my nightgown, before I had to shower and put on my man clothe. My youngest daughter and her dopey dog have moved back in. She probably knows I underdress but she wouldn't like it if i was fully dressed around the house and I don't need to do it so badly that I need to push it on her. Plus I would be too self conscious to enjoy it, but i sure do miss waking up in the morning and being able to walk out of my room in my nightgown. I don't even bother putting on a dress or outfit since I can't enjoy them around the house. may be time for an Air B&B trip.
    Now that the weather is nice, I really want to enjoy my short skits in the back yard, I'll admit I'm kinda depressed.
    I have to feed my cats in my room so the garbage disposal dog doesn't eat all their food. That's why I have a pet door on my bedroom door. The dog is always looking in.
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  2. #2
    Member TAG's Avatar
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    Is this a temporary thing for your daughter?

  3. #3
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    U don't mention the age of your daughter Stacy. Mine moved in full time when she turned 18. Because she drove, I could never be sure when she mite suddenly return. She almosy caught me several times. So, I had to tell her about Sherry! Then, we worked out a schedule she wouldn't ever have to see me dressed.

    U could do the same if you're daughter's an adult. If she's a kid, that means she's in school 5 days a week so u won't be surprised if u dress then!
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  4. #4
    Member StacyG's Avatar
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    She is 21. She and my ex didn't hit it off well, so she went to live with a friend. She does have a job and I need to nail down her work schedule, but I really don't want any surprises. Her birth mother and her sister caused a lot of damage and I don't need to add anything else to her pain that she's having to work through.
    The way the economy is, she wouldn't be able to afford an apartment on her current income, so I don't know how long she intends to stay.

  5. #5
    Miss Conception Karren H's Avatar
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    Might be cheaper for you to subsidize her apartment. Add all those Air B&B charges up and put it towards her housing allowance. Both our kids are grown but we still pay a number of their bills. Just a thought.

  6. #6
    Senior Member Heather76's Avatar
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    I can only surmise what I would do; so, take this for what it's worth. She is an adult and fortunately, a young adult. I say "fortunately' because many here have mentioned that younger people are more accepting of the many variations in how people express themselves. I would sit her down and tell her how life is. I'd explain to her that her dad enjoys cross dressing in the privacy of his own home and her moving in is putting a damper on that activity. You would hope she is accepting of this part of your life; but, you also understand if seeing you dressed would be difficult for her. If it would be difficult for her to see you dressed, you would like to know her schedule so you can dress when she's not home if you choose to. Also let her know that should she return home outside the provided schedule and finds you dressed not to be shocked and to know that you will excuse yourself to change into your drab clothing. After all, it is your home and you have every right to live as you wish. Trying to respect her perspective is a good thing to do; but, her respecting your right to dress as you wish is also proper. She's your daughter - not your wife - yet communication is the correct path forward. My daughter is 51 and this is the path I'd take.
    It's never too late to enjoy a happy childhood.
    Live each day as though it's your last 'cause one day you'll be right.
    I'm finding the more feminine side of me...and I ❤️ this adventure.

  7. #7
    Member StacyG's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Karren Hutton View Post
    Might be cheaper for you to subsidize her apartment. Add all those Air B&B charges up and put it towards her housing allowance. Both our kids are grown but we still pay a number of their bills. Just a thought.
    I'm having her pay me rent and I'm putting that in my savings account. When there's enough there for a deposit and pet deposit, she will move. my old car just died so I had to buy a new/used truck and that added expense will prevent me from being able to support her that much financially.
    I won't take many trips to an B&B. My boss is 83 and I'm the only employee where I work. When I take off, he finds the self destruct button on the computer, lol. We do have an accountant that can log in remotely to help him some.

  8. #8
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    Your situation is sort of like "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" with a wife, but, with a daughter. Work schedules, work arounds. Your a good dad to help her out.

  9. #9
    Member Marissa Q's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Heather76 View Post
    Trying to respect her perspective is a good thing to do; but, her respecting your right to dress as you wish is also proper. She's your daughter - not your wife....
    Never a greater truth spoken.
    That being said, Stacy, I think you're a great parent and hope your daughter -- at least one day -- understands that you were prepared to sacrifice an important part of yourself so that she could thrive.

  10. #10
    Platinum Member alwayshave's Avatar
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    Stacy, I feel your pain. I have adult children in my home and can't dress when I want either.
    Please call me Jamie, I always_have crossdressed, I always will, "alwayshave".

  11. #11
    Senior Member Jenn A116's Avatar
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    If I were in your position (and I'm glad I'm not) I'd go ahead an tell the daughter. At age 21 she's mature enough to decide on her own if she is comfortable with both sides of you.

    Basically, its a win-win situation. If she accepts your femme side you are free to express yourself at home whenever you want to. If she doesn't accept your femme side she is free to move out leaving you to dress when you want to.

    A bit harsh? Perhaps. But these are the two possible outcomes as I see it.
    Jenn A --- nothing fancy, just me.

  12. #12
    Senior Member Kris Burton's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stephanie47 View Post
    Your situation is sort of like "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" with a wife, but, with a daughter.
    Very much so I think. I am always of the opinion that those around us that need to know should. When she lived away from home she was not on the needs to know lost, but now she is. Have "the talk" as it were with her, and if she is accepting then all is good - you don't know until you do. Things left unsaid brings you the added angst and frustration that you feel now. You don't need that. Even if she doesn't like it, try to work out something that will allow you to dress without her having to see it - that's a DADT. If you have a good relationship now it likely won't even come to that.

  13. #13
    Member Erin Lafleur's Avatar
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    I certainly sympathize with your situation Stacy, I've been doing the same thing for over four months now.
    I took my elderly mother in and had to nurse her back to health after some pretty significant neglect in another city. Mom moves into her new digs in a couple of weeks and although I will no doubt miss her, it will be best for both, for sure. She needs her independence and I need my life back to normal.
    During her stay, I have had to satisfy my desire to dress primarily by on-line retail therapy. I think I've probably sent Bezos to the moon and back a couple of times.
    I bought new boobs, wig, skirts, dresses, lingerie, jewelry, heels... you name it. I could only try on for fit and then sadly store away until Mom is out on her own. Exciting and frustrating all at the same time. Every once in a while I would underdress in my favorite silk camisole and panties (no bra or boobs) and while that would scratch the itch somewhat, underdressing doesn't do a lot for me. But it's better than nothing.
    I did have to be a little careful as I found myself somewhat absent mindedly adjusting my spaghetti strap in her presence but I really don't think she noticed really. Her vision isn't that great. I must admit that I got a little satisfaction in so doing as it was secretly trying on her slips etc as a young boy decades ago that led me down this most enjoyable path. If only she could see my current collection of feminine finery!
    Anyway, you'll get through it. Absence does make the heart grow fonder afterall!
    The most common form of despair is not being who you are. - Soren Kierkegaard

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