It doesn't phase me at all.
It doesn't phase me at all.
Julianna Frances
Lorna, it isn't uncommon in some cultures for women to not be allowed to shop in person. Instead, male family members go and buy a bunch of things they think might be ok. They take it home, and then the woman for whom they are buying then decides what they want, and the rest gets taken back. Just a possibility.
Hi Molly , One thing I learned was not to make Eye contact with shoppers in the Ladies section, >Orchid**00**
Having my ears triple pierced is AWESOME, ~~......
I can explain it to you, But I can't comprehend it for you !
If at first you don't succeed, Then Skydiving isn't for you.
Be careful what you wish for, Once you ring a bell , you just can't Un-Ring it !! !!
I just went through these emotions The other day. I bought a new outfit at a store in guy mode and went to khols looking for stockings and panties.
Found myself alone for first part found what I was looking for. But then there were about 6 different women in the department so I put on my big girl panties and shopped right where I was and bought 5 more pairs of panties.
So I got 6 panties and as I approached the front I saw the line and there where men in it 🤔 so lost all courage for a moment and came up with a solution.
I picked up one mens t shirt and used it to hide the rest of my items until I got to register. So if you act naturally in the same situation next time regardless of how your dressed you should be fine.
I've been to buy makeup at a couple of local bargain bazaar-type store while dressed. The first time I did, I left my purse in the car, undiscovered until I was going to the counter - I nearly bolted then, but went and got it then returned to the store. But I'm normally in drab when I'm shopping for clothing or shoes.
I used to be terrified of going into the women's section of stores, and it got to a stage that my dressing was curtailed as I had nothing to wear. So I just had to 'girl-up' and go do it. That was a few years ago now, and I haven't had any bad experiences so far. Some of the stores I go to have gotten to know me and I'm just like any one of the GG women customers to them.
Sometimes if someone glares at me I remember that I sometimes may be giving people a look if they're looking at the exact section I want to rifle through, maybe they're just annoyed I'm in the way.
Molly, once in Kohls, in male mode, in the lingerie section shopping for panties I had an older women tell me I was in the wrong section. I said, no I'm not. End of conversation.
Last edited by alwayshave; 03-31-2022 at 06:05 PM.
Please call me Jamie, I always_have crossdressed, I always will, "alwayshave".
Sometimes but not always. Depends on who is around and if they are at the exact section I want to look at. To bad you didn't go over. Kohl's has my favorite Vanity Fair bikini bottom
I don't have a problem shopping in ladies section when in male mode, but it's funny that every time I go there, shop assistant comes right over to help. They don't do that for the ladies and let them browse for them self, at least for a while. Maybe I still feel a bit awkward when waiting with clothes in front of changing room to get my turn to try them on or when trying on shoes and walk around the shop wearing high heels. But since I started going out fully crossdressed also during the day, I rarely do my shopping for female items that I have to try on before buying, in male mode.
I was once shopping in a ladies clothes shop in male mode. A customer made a fuss about there being a man in the shop. The sales assistant reply to the customer was to the effect that the shop could serve whoever it wanted.
You just never know...people can surprise you sometimes.
I was in the women's underwear section of a local Walmart (I hesitate to use the term "lingerie" in this context here) a few weeks ago looking for a particular brand/size of panties.
As I was scanning the racks for my preferred choice, I was soon joined by a 30-something GG on a similar mission. I'm at a point now where I am just as comfortable shopping for women's clothes in drab as I am shopping for male clothes (although the latter happens far, far less frequently now than the former), consequently I stood my ground and didn't let her presence faze me.
I guess there is some power in just "owning it"....not only did this GG appear to be totally unperturbed by my presence there, at one point she actually turned towards me to express her frustration over not being able to find what she was looking for, and likely seeking sympathy and validation as women tend to do in such situations. Being the gentleman (?) 🤔 that I am, I comiserated with her and eventually moved on...also empty-handed, I might add.
All in all, a very uneventful interaction, and no children or small animals were harmed in the process 😚.
I don't dress in public, but I'm usually pretty ok in most department stores in the women's section or in the cosmetics. If a store has a combination of self-checkout and humans, I try and use the human checkout just to gain more confidence. Usually they don't care. Even had a conversation with one girl ringing me out who was pretty sure what I was buying was for me and seemed to think it was cute. The exception is TJ Maxx...it always seems to have late-50's women in it who just look like they'll give you a hard time. I don't buy, ehm, unmentionables in-person though. It just seems ripe someone to scream "perv" through the store.
I haven't yet been courageous enough for a women's only store though. Thanks to the internet and COVID, there isn't one within 45 minutes of me anymore anyway.
Hi Molly,
I wish I had your courage to go out dressed. You are doing great and don't let them get you down. Now if I could only live my own works.
Brenda.
I think the answer to your dilemma is just experience. The more you put yourself in that situation, the easier it becomes. A lot of it has to do with the realization that sales staff is supportive no matter how you present. In fact, I truly believe that salesladies actually ENJOY helping CDs find their true expression. Could it be the novelty of it, or the knowledge that they're helping to break down toxic masculinity? Or something else? I don't know, but it's real and it's spectacular.
I have quite oftenhad that hesitation in guy mode ,but one day I told myself to own it, I went in to a dress shop as my fashion favorite is a peasant skirt nice long and flowing ,the sales girl came up and inquired I told her what I was looking for ,of course her next question was for who? I told her right out it is for me ! she did not blink an eye said it was good I was out about it so she could properly fit me , we found one I put it on and she took a look went down one waist size , then she mentioned if you can afford it you need the peasant blouse to go with it all came out great ,then after a bit of chit chat she brings a tape and takes all the important measurements and says keep it handy that sure beat the death stares I have encountered elsewhere
The older you are, the less you bother with other people. Forty years ago I got the usual rush and paranoia about shopping. That fades with time. How do people know you are not buying clothes for someone else? ?Real men are secure in their masculinity? is a statement that you can give anyone who makes a comment. Seriously, if you see a woman buying men?s clothing items, do you automatically assume she is buying them for herself?
Thirty years ago, my wife and I had a dinner party once or twice a month. We had a party on Halloween so I got dressed up as the maid. This is infront of vanilla friends. We went to a uniform store and I tried on dresses. I?m with my wife and no one cared. I had to go to a shoe store alone to get heels and that wasn?t a problem. Halloween seems to be the time that straight guys can dress up and it is fine.
A CD friend told me that some movie houses show the Rocky Horror Story on Halloween and they are filled up with guys playing Magenta.
Years ago I read a book called ? Vested Interests? which was about the cultural history of cross dressing. I read it pre internet and it was mind blowing.
I?d like to reply to this thread as it is something I myself have struggled with for a long tiime. I?m 46 years old so I rememmber the pre internet days. I f I wanted something I had to go to a brick and mortar store and buy it.now I can just go online and buy it. So much easier. I do feel very uncomfortable shopping as a guy in the female clothes and lingerie department however I am at ease and comfortable in the makeup aisles. I Jane no issue going up to a sales associate I?m the makeup dept and saying i am looking for a new foundation or a new mascara. None what so ever. Why? Idk. Maybe becuase as a man I do wear tinted moisturizer and some power and I know my colors? But when it comes to clothing shoes or lingerie I just feel like I?m being stared at or something. The same with accessories I have no issue looking at jewelry or handbags. None at all. I?ll spend whatever Amy of time I want looking through the jewelry or handbags and be completely comfortable. I have even asked to try on rings and no one bats an eye or thinks anything. I make my purchases and leave for jewelry handbags and makeup and don?t think anything of it. Clothes shoes and lingerie and I?m a paranoid freak. It?s just funny how our brains are conditioned.
I am always dressed as a man when I shop for my ladies clothes, I love shopping for lingerie and long since stopped worrying about what others might think about a man in the ladies area and in all the time I have done it, I have never had one single adverse comment from other shoppers or the shop assistants
It wasn't always that way in my head though, it took a few years for me to be confident
Our daughter told the story last night of her now-ex BF going to the store to get Midol for her. The customer behind him in the register queue gave him some cr*p about his purchase, "It's not for headaches, you know" kind of stuff. So instead of praise for being a supportive SO, he got harassed.
If somebody gives you grief, remember that it's not that it *takes* all kinds, it's just that there *are* all kinds.
I always shop in drab and no matter how long I've been doing it or how far away from home I go to do it, I always feel like I'm out of place and I can't seem to shake it. It takes effort to push through how I feel and buy what I want anyway. Just for that reason I'd love to try shopping en femme, among a million others...
I definitely remember a long time ago looking at bras in a wal mart and a middle aged woman suddenly snuck up behind me and we were both looking at the same bras. At first she didn't bat an eye, but then she looked at me for a sec and then it must've registered for her what I was doing there because she gave me an audible "oh!" and then she winked at me and smiled...I felt so relieved and happy! She just shopped right along side me and didn't say anything else to me or I to her. Eventually I left and went to pay. I think that was as positive an experience a i could have had, given everything.
Last edited by josie_S; 04-25-2022 at 10:43 AM. Reason: typos!
Not long ago I was shopping (drab) the Lane Bryant Doorbuster panty sale and had picked out panties for both my wife and for myself. The sales associate asked me if I realized that my selections were in more than one size. I replied, "Yes, they are for more than one person." No problem...
I wouldn't say that it concerns all women, and territorial may not be the right word for it (it's more like wanting a safe zone). But I agree with 100% of Leslie's explanation here. Women have valid reasons to be concerned when a male ventures in their section. And the CD explanation - vs perv - will probably not be the one that comes to mind for most of them. Keep in mind that most women will experience some kind of sexual harassment in their life (in USA, 81% of women, 43 % of men, and the perpetrators are primarily males, even for the male victims. See https://www.nsvrc.org/statistics). If you don't believe it, ask the females you know. I asked my wife once, and was surprised to learn that she was harassed many times including unwanted contact.
This is just the way I do most of my shopping now. If I shop for my male self I just do it myself. If I shop for Amy I ask the first female SA I see to help me select what I'm looking for. I always walk away with better quality/price than if I had did it myself.
It's kind of funny...
I feel more comfortable shopping for lingerie in menswear. I don't want people to see a crossdresser in the lingerie section. I would rather they see me in a skirt doing non-lingerie things. I overthink everything.... but I would rather not have someone's only CD encounter be related to panties. I'm a nut. I know it!
I am a man who presents male and wears feminine clothes.
I blog about my outings: https://joeypress.wordpress.com/