One of my deep regrets is that I didn't explore crossdressing back in my 20s. I was too busy trying to be a man and too busy trying to put the "queer" label from middle and high school behind me. The urge to transition didn't hit until I was in my 40s, when I was deeply engrossed in being a father and a husband, and while I enjoy being father, husband, son, and uncle, this part of me will likely stay a secret between me and my tolerant wife until I'm gone.
Nancy
"If you are lucky enough to find a way of life that you love, you have to find the courage to live it." -- John Irving
Wearing the "pretties" females wore when I was a young boy did not bring along any desire to be a girl. It brought shame, disgust and self loathing. Get real! What would I have been if I had been a young woman in the 1950's? I would have been expected to stay home and pump out babies. I am sure all the oldsters remember boys in junior high school took shop classes; metal, wood working, electrical, printing, etc, while girls took millinery, home economics, etc. Basically, women were second rate citizens. I wonder how many girls wanted to be boys. In my neighborhood all the girls played "girl" approved games with the exception of "Charlie," AKA Linda who was our center fielder on our baseball team. She had the "goods," hitting, fielding. I hope she did not fall into the societal trap later in life. I hope she became a doctor and not a nurse.
I wonder where I would be if I had all the knowledge of the internet available to me 50 years ago. Times are certainly different. Where I grew up 50 years ago you might hear of some guy that was a bit weird and maybe wore dresses, but that was about it. Nobody talked about it. Today the whole world is a few mouse clicks away.
There was some talk of gays, but even that was something one just heard about. It was used more to jokingly put a friend down when he was acting up. Nobody knew of anyone that was gay. It was something that happened elsewhere. It might have been related to growing up in a city of less than 10,000 people.
Hi ,
I have been doing the same and iam 62 years old and the more years come to join me i have noticed that I have been loving every second of my crossdressing ,,it has been a life joy and more 💖
My first inclination is to shout, Absolutely!!!
I did so many things when I was little to try and be like my sisters and if I were 16 today, I would definitely make the decision to be the woman I feel I should have always been.
But to go back in time, especially knowing what I know today about my extended family, I'm not sure I would. It would not have been pretty.
The world I grew up in was so intolerant of so many things in so many ways.
I have a lesbian cousin that couldn't bring her wife to her mother, my aunt's funeral, and that's mild. I'll just leave it at that.
I am Me and Me is OK!
Shelby
While many of us dream of what it would be like to be women, it's of course mainly a distorted dream of becoming an ideal one. I knew from early on that there was absolutely zero chance to ever be the girl I dreamed to be; I was going to be quite tall, have huge feet and hands (just like dad), wearing size 13 shoes and xl gloves by the time I was 13. Barrel chested by about 20, there was absolutely no chance to become the girl of my daydreams. So I made up my mind, to just live with being a crossdresser. By my early 20's, as I got better at dating and socializing, the desire to dress in girl clothes was eclipsed by the desire to have girlfriends, and I went through about a ten year period where the desire to dress up rarely if ever occurred; I thought that I had either 'beaten it', outgrown it, or maybe it was just a phase I had been going through. But by my late 30's the urge came back with a vengeance, and I gave up on the idea of it ever going away.
So all I have left, is my daydreams.
Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.
Yes I would have transitioned
I really am a woman deep down and wished I could have lived my life as a wife, mother and career woman. I really think I would have been very happy and successful and contributed more to society than I did as living as a man.
Remember back in the 70's and 80's there was no acceptance for gay people and even less for transgender. As transgender you couldn't work, your family rejected your female self, and the people would society thought you to be out cast.
I just wanted to be a woman and live my life but it really couldn't be.
I try not to confuse curiosity and desire. Sure, I have been very curious of what it would be like to be a girl/woman. If I could be like Alec in my stories, that would be outstanding! But that's curiosity, not desire. I am actually glad that I flat out rejected the idea of transitioning, not to mention pursuing dressing up when I was much younger. I count my late 20's and 30's as some of the happiest times of my life (happier than I am now, for that matter), something I wouldn't want to give up.
steffigirl37,
I was unsure how to respond to your OP, or even if I should - but these bits got me thinking:
And...Originally Posted by steffigirl37
Like you, at a young age, I wished I could be a girl. I just KNEW that I was not supposed to be a boy.even though at a young age I would wish I could be a girl, although I have never told anybody that.
I "borrowed" my sister's clothes when I could get away with it, raided my grandparents' attic for things they had boxed up in there, and even had a couple outfits stashed in unused structures in the neighborhood where I could go and "be" a girl every so often.
But - even though I knew deep inside that I was supposed to have been a girl, I also knew without a doubt that I really wasn't. I was continually reminded of that. "Boys don't do that", "don't be a sissy", "you want to what? E-www gross!", and worse comments drove that point home with a vengeance. Add an angry, verbally abusive father, an unaccepting social setting, and living in poverty - and what chance did I have?
So - I tried to adapt - to fit in. I resolved to be NOTHING like my father (guess I REALLY did that
).
I swore to myself that I would make my own way in life and never have to live on the welfare dime again. I've succeeded - but I've never stopped knowing that I'm trapped in the wrong gender and wishing I'd been born female.
SO - even If I'd known what I know now about transitioning, I don't see how I could have done anything that much differently. The opportunities just weren't there.
I might have been a little less hard on myself about what I felt.
Then again, knowing that such things were possible, but unavailable to me - might have made things worse.
Who knows? Not me!
In another few months I will be 63 years old.
I overall have been happy with my life.
Sure there has been marital problems, (which I finally have behind me)
but that is not what we are talking about here.
I have enjoyed cross-dressing since puberty.
Knowing what I know now. would I change anything.
Sure, I would have been more open to the world in my younger years.
That probably would have led to more self acceptance now.
May have made it easier for me to step out the door now.
I would not have thought about transition or going any kind of a different path
I am very happy just being a crossdresser.
I don't think the world is ready to see a guy dressed like my avatar.
But that is me, and I am most comfortable dressed that way.
We all have our own separate thoughts and paths that we would have or could have taken.
Most important, do what makes you the most happy,
that is all that really counts
just like my sister said in my signature line,
my sister's reply when I told her how I prefer to dress
"Everyone has there thing, all that matters is that you are happy, love what you do and who you do it with"
I am like so many of you in this thread... At about 4 years after my birth, I started feeling like I just wasn't right, had a lot of tendencies for girl stuff. Started out with a pair of my mom's panties, then more followed. I too thought it was a phase or just something sexual, I'd dress up and have to take care of business and then feel ashamed and guilty. I couldn't get it all off fast enough, then after a few minutes I'd feel incomplete and have to put it all back on. This went on for years too, figured girlfriends would solve it, nope. Figured getting married would solve it, nope.
Too big a male to ever transition and back then it wasn't like it is now. Wish I'd known then what I do now though, still. Can't do it now because I'd look awful. So I too have just decided to live as a crossdresser but deep down I feel more feminine than male and being dressed is the only time I feel normal and in place.
the transition question no matter the age is a great question If I was young in todays environment both political and social It might be some thing I would think about but I am old now 75 and I couldn't see it. To hard to costly to much of a change in all ways and why. Me I just don't need it and it wouldn't make life any easier and would probably make it harder. I can just pretend to be dressed with maybe some under dressing. True it wouldn't be the same thrill as when I see my dressed reflection. but it would be a whole lot less head ache
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]Sallee
My wife asked me the same question. I think she already knew the answer. I told her if I was born in this day and age I would probably transition. I'm 64 and have been dressing for at least 55 years now and it was so hard back in my younger days. No internet and always felt like I was the only one out there doing this. Boy was I wrong.
I started over 50 years ago with a lot of guilt but a lot of pleasure as well. However I never really gave transitioning much thought. I always felt comfortable being a guy even though I was a guy with a peculiar pleasure. If I were 14 now, I probably would be more open about it and would be looking for a girl/woman who would be accepting. My fantasy has always been to enjoy the company of a woman while being dressed as one.
transitioning never occurred to me then nor does it now, although in retrospect, (I'm 67), when I was younger and slimmer and less wrinkled, I would have been much more embracing of my crossdressing
The thought of transitioning has never really crossed my mind much. I have given it thought, but to be honest... I just don't feel like it's right for me. I do enjoy crossdressing and have been doing it since I was young and in my teens, granted it's mostly been victorian style dresses and nothing modern women wear today. Although, if I was given a chance at birth to choose my gender, I would have gone female since I do feel more happier that way. Now that I'm an established man who likes crossdressing as a princess or in victorian style outfits, I really don't feel the need for a big change like that.
I appreciate your experience. I'm 32 and have been dressing on and off for 4 years and intermittently prior to that. I have had the thought that about transitioning but i don't think I want to take it that far. I do have a masculine side that I do enjoy. Maybe things will change over the years, who knows! I have been working out lately to try an get a bigger butt. Emphasis on trying.
In a perfect world I would love to have small boobs that can be hidden in guy mode for work.
I never considered, or thought of, transitioning. I've never wanted to be female. Other than trying on my mom's lingerie as a boy and my wife's pantyhose on very rare occasions, I never really considered cross dressing until almost 2 years ago at age 74. If I could, I would now cross dress fully 24/7. As it is, I under dress 24/7 to one degree or another. I'm thrilled with my situation and realize dressing fully 24/7 will NEVER happen.
It's never too late to enjoy a happy childhood.
Live each day as though it's your last 'cause one day you'll be right.
I'm finding the more feminine side of me...and I ❤️ this adventure.
I'm 64 now, and first slipped a pair of panties on aged 14. I pretty-well stuck with panties and sometimes a cami for many years, and have always loved sleeping in panties and a lacy slip. I only fully dressed very infrequently and never for very long, as I was (still am, basically) in the closet apart from a very few close friends who know I dress. And I almost never under-dressed in public until 3 or 4 years ago. It did take me a long time to accept myself for who and what I am, and this forum has helped me a great deal in that respect.
But since a serious health scare a year or so ago, my dressing has escalated out of all proportion - possibly due to the fact that I'd been so ill and dressing has helped me on the recovery road by making me feel better about myself, which it does, or maybe I'm trying to make up for lost time and opportunities - I don't know. But I always under-dress now, with panties, cami and bra, and knee-high pull-ups. I always wear something femme, such as a ladies' watch, bracelet(s), ankle bracelet and most days, nail-polish even when in drab. I always sleep in femme nightwear, often go out dressed (I don't pass but I don't care), and feel more comfortable being en-femme by the day.
Would I transition? No, for a number of good reasons, age and health issues being only two. I never really even considered it until recently so it was never an issue when I was young. I'd love breast implants but they also are off the table for the same reasons. Could I live 24/7 as a woman? Probably, if I could get away with it. But it's OK that I can be Jimmy when the need arises, and Wendy pretty-much whenever I like otherwise. I seem to have found a balance where I can be happy presenting as either. It's really the best of both worlds for me at the moment, and I have no plans to stop dressing any time soon.
I'm in my 50s. I have never considered transitioning. I have often thought about what it would be like to be a GG, but this has never been a thought to transition. I like feeling that I am a man, and like feeling that I am a woman. It took many years to fully embrace my feminine aspects. They are a part of me, not all of me. I can't imagine transitioning as I would be outwardly giving up my masculine aspects. I'm both. I wouldn't want to sacrifice one for the other.
I'm coming close to being an empty nester. My wife knows that when the time comes I will likely be crossdressing a lot more. She's supportive, and we've talked many times about this time in our lives that is coming. She doesn't see there being a problem, but will always communicate with me if there is. It's possible that at least at home I will be crossdressing the vast majority of the time once we're empty nesters. That will likely subside to something like 50/50 over time. Right now, it's about 97/3 (male/female presentation).
I remember when Dr. Renee Richards transitioned in the early 70's that is really the first time I had heard of it and I was amazed how nice she looked. I remember wondering about it but thought how unwelcoming it would be even though I was not very happy the way I was. Fast forward I am now 67, the internet has been around for a while and I know of many people some close friends who have transitioned and most seem so happy they did. It took a lot for them to do this and they lost friends and family connections in many cases so their need to do this to be who they are is a very strong need. For me I realized I do not have that need that they had so no plans to transition. It is a huge step and clearly life changing and for those that need it so glad there is so much information available today. After retiring I grew my hair out and wear leggings often and it doesn't take much to dress and look feminine when I wish. it is amazing how far we have come since Dr. Richards and others found a way! Of course there is still a long way to go too, though I think the younger generations are showing more acceptance so there is hope for the future. I will say this when I was in my 50's I pondered transitioning and did some research but never moved forward on this and now glad I did not as I have found me and I am okay moving freely from my femside to male side and they really are not very far apart these days.
I am in my 60's and have dressed since I was very young, through all the difficult times trying to understand me and what I was different, but in all those years, it has only ever been dressing for me, I have never had the urge to take it further and tradition to a woman, I love dressing and more so that ever now, since I found my inner calm some years back, dressing as a woman has been my wonderful go to escape and it makes me feel oh so good inside
But for me that is it, I dress as often as I can and love every minute of it and equally enjoy the time I return to my male persona, although I have worn nothing but ladies underwear now for many years, so never fully go back anymore, I enjoy both me's
I would have done so many things differently then if I had known then all I know now. I am a closet crossdresser, dressing while home alone, with no desire to pass as a woman to anyone. If I had the opportunity to relive my past, I would have wanted the freedom and confidence to have been out to my family and closest friends, but still not presented to the public. I would still identify as a male occasionally wearing women's underwear and a dress at home. Transitioning to full time female never would have been of any interest.
Crossdressing is enough for me. The thoughts of transitioning have crossed my mind, but I can say I don't have the feeling I was born in the wrong body. I just think I would have been happier as a woman. I never felt I fit in. I am working from home full time now so I get to dress almost every day. If I went to sleep tonight and woke up a woman, I wouldn't be upset.
Posting Permissions
