Perhaps it's just me, but I wonder why someone would want to be your friend on this site and after you accept their friend request you never hear from them again.
Do others have this happen?
I can't quite figure out why this happens so often.
Please let me know if you have any ideas.
Sara-Also
Sara, I have many who do that. It turns out that sometimes we run out of things to say to each other. Have you tried PMing them to see if you get a response.
Leslie Mary Shy
Remember this:
You do not have to be a man to love a woman, or be a woman to love women's clothes on her or yourself.
_________________________
I know. This is why I never send or accept any friend request. Because every time one was accepted, the senders were never to be heard of again... (ominous music)
Seriously, I suppose some folks may just be interested in tracking your posts more easily, or too shy to do the first step.
On many forums, collecting 'friends' is a status symbol. Same as 'Likes' on FB. Look at me! I'm loved by a cast of thousands. (obscure reference to Bozo's Circus) The friends I do accept share common views or interests as I do.
Hugs, Terri
I have a few friends on here, and I'd totally connect with more. I like the idea of making that little extra passive connection to people who you respect, admire, or are intrigued by. It might be someone who writes a really excellent perspective on something, someone who obviously has a ton of skill that I'd like to learn, folks in my region that I might bump into at a show or convention, or someone into non-cd interests like athletics. I'd DM my friends more but the site is a little clunky at times, and the last time I sent one, it wasn't totally clear that my message even sent!
I never really understood the friends on here thing that much. You can send anyone a pm. I do have 19 friends but I don't interact with them any more then the regular forum.
I'm often puzzled that I get friend requests in the first place. Of course, I'm still such a novice at social media that I may not get what the advantages are of friending someone on the site. A PM to go with a friend request would help, too.
I have a few friends here that have sent me requests and we certainly don't interact regularly. I have a couple I have sent out and try to interact with them occasionally. but like others have said I use it more to track their posts and to PM them once in a while. There is only one member I communicate with regularly.
I don't really understand the friend thing here myself either, but if they're active here and not some weird new account I'll always accept the request.
It's not as much an issue here as it is on CDH, where every other time I post something I get a couple of friend requests from brand new accounts with zero posts. No thank you.
i don't have enough time to be active friends with people i have known in real life for 20 years let alone internet friends. life is busy. i am not kip dordy
I am glad others have posted what I have wondered. What is the advantage or point of friends on here? I am all for it, and have accepted any coming my way and only sent out one so far, but again, I don’t understand what distinction it provides.
Probably the biggest benefit is that it is easy to see when your friends are online so you can PM in real time, but I only stay in frequent touch with a handful of members. Some have come and gone.
Sandi
The difference, and advantage you might say, to using the "friends" feature is that it gives you a bit of connection you might otherwise not have had. If receive a message from someone and they are among your friends it does not seem so quite out of the blue. I did more "friending" when I first began here, usually when someone said something in a post that resonated with me, or displayed one of my other than CD interests. That also goes vice versa when I send out a PM. Some may become real friends or virtual friends, and some you may not hear from for a while, but as for me I try to be more alert when I see a post from a friend. I continue to try to friend persons that make comments I can relate to or show interests we have in common... sure you could do that with anyone here, but friending give it a greater sense of familiarity. On flickr they call that "following" - and it's a bit more like that I think.
Hi Sara, Yep, that's me too. I have 50 friends here, not sure how I ended up with so many. I don't make it a point to follow or reach out much. Good observation, I will watch this post. Brenda
I had a bunch of friends, even requested friend status, but honestly, I never knew what significance the friend status had. I guess I am not very grood at being a friend here or in real life.
I've been here for fourteen years, and in that time I have managed to accumulate 33 friends.
Of these
1 is a very good personal friend of mine
A handful are still active on the site - too many are no longer active
There is one to whom I send an email at Christmas - she replies - she is no longer active on the site.
Another would chat with me on Skype, but we are no longer in touch.
4 have been banned!!! Wow!
There is one person on this site with whom I regularly exchange emails - s/he is not officially a friend - the correspondence began after s/he commented in a PM on one of my posts (or I on hers? = can't recall).
I have mentioned previously that there is only other one person met on this site that I have actually met face-to-face. It was like meeting a brother! We are no longer in touch.
We all move on.
There are friend collectors, some think its a creditability thing "hey I know such and such" and some actually follow-up on birthday's/holidays etc...
My friends, I've always welcome them to CT if ever passing through etc...
Escapism isn't necessarily bad, but is definitely unhealthy in the long term. While helpful in the short term, things will degrade over time. At some point, the escapee will have to face the issue. Things simply blowing over isn't really going to happen in many situations.
In five years here i have sent approx. 20 friend requests and i do confess to being bad at corresponding.
They are all members whose contributions here i particularly like.
Quite a few were the members that i met during the online Zoom chats last year. Another was to a member whom i also contacted on Facebook. They are all people that i would genuinely like to meetup with, but for the unfortunate fact that i live on on the other side of the world and have a fear of flying.(Actually, it's not a fear of flying, it's a fear of crashing, but i digress....)
One member lives comparatively nearby, but our attempts to meetup were hampered by pandemic. Hopefully this summer local Pride events will bring another opportunity.
"The only way is onward. There is no turning back."
I often send friend requests as a way of supporting new members - to let them know I appreciate them being here
I do the same and have made some great internet contacts that way.Originally Posted by bridget thronton
Just shows support for the new folks coming here.
I had lots on FB before getting my page taken down.
Not sure why so I waited a month or so and created another one.
I never really kept an eye on how many "friends" I had.
It was a couple hundred give or take.
Hey Krea, Yes those zoom meetings were fun, and I still have that "Roots" trip on my bucket list Ronnie
"A smile is the best makeup a girl could wear." (M.M.)
I have a lot of friends here that I've never heard from since the first friend request.
I also have a lot of friends whom I've actually met FtF.
I also do a spring cleaning of friend that I no longer hear from, so be warned friends, spring cleaning is coming.
I've met 20 of my friends FtF.
Last edited by Sometimes Steffi; 04-17-2022 at 04:00 PM.
Hi, I'm Steffi and I'm a crossdresser... And I accept and celebrate both sides of me. Or, maybe I'm gender fluid.
I'm actually unclear at just what being a friend on this site does. I've accepted friend requests sent to me, but again I don't know what the signifies.
Jenn A --- nothing fancy, just me.
As I've been a member here a long time I've seen a lot of changes to the CD.com website.
Mostly they've removed features that were too hard to manage or they felt were unnecessary. Possibly at one time there were things u could do with "Friends" here that u can't anymore? U don't need to be a Friend to PM anyone here, Sandi!
But, maybe a long time Mod can explain this more fully?
U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.
Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!
Sometimes life gets in the way. Work or family commitments wear you down until all you feel like doing is sitting in front of the television and zoning out. I work in a stressful environment and the last thing I want to do some nights is chit chat. We just finished a stretch of 60 hour weeks where I got up, went to work, came home, ate supper and got ready for bed. I don't mean to ignore people but I finally learned that if I don't take care of myself I am no good to anybody. Please forgive me if you are one of the friends I don't IM with a lot but I'm doing the best I can.
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