We really do spend an inordinate amount of time trying to label, unpack, explain, and rationalize what we do. I often think that it's because we have been conditioned to feel shame and embarrassment.
Flyshit out of pepper. Hilarious and so true.
Originally Posted by jayme357
When I first joined this forum, I felt there was a lot of snobbery. Those who dress fully and exceptionally were the elite of the elite and we who underdressed were heavily frowned upon. I felt like my presence was only mildly tolerated. There were occasional comments that were belittling and berating. I didn't really participate the first 2 years.
The prevailing attitude simmered down at some point and I finally felt like my thoughts and participation were welcomed. Let's please not fall back into the attitude of "if you don't fully dress you don't belong".
We're all here because we prefer women's clothing. Some enjoy dressing to the 9's. Others are happy to have 30 minutes to wear a femme top. This is a journey we get to share here, and we're all at different stops along the way.
I am a "closeted" cross dresser---A hetero male who dresses as a woman in private (I don't go out dressed)---- Save for the occasional Halloween Costume, or "Womanless beauty contest".
As far as under dressing goes, I have thought of it, But I think of my mother's warnings of having dirty underwear (What if I got in an accident?)--- Personally I think I would prefer to be in the dirty underwear.
One thing that has not been mentioned is that of ones journey through dressing,for some baby steps, for some a passing phase for others the start of a journey to full dressing, for the most part it is all down to finding out what is what and where and how. For some underdressing is all they can do because of social demands for others more so.
I started life a lost man now I am a found woman
Everyone's version of "full on dressing" is different.
It's up to the individual what they consider to fit that category. If you don't think it is, that's fine. Some don't have the ability, time, means or desire to do otherwise and that's just fine.
I don't think it's full on crossdressing but that's only my opinion and has no bearing on what they do. Technically crossdressing is wearing garments of the opposite sex. In that context if you wear just panties you are crossdressing. It's not for us to judge.
I don't wear women's clothes, I wear MY clothes !
By your definition, I am an underdresser, not a crossdresser, because I am not interested in wigs, make-up, or anything beyond the clothing. Even though I dress privately, to me a man in a dress is a crossdresser
My confusion is that many who transition participate in a crossdressing forum. To me, if you are transitioning, you are no longer a crossdresser.
I agree with @Kelli_cd.
Everything is on a spectrum. Yes, it is crossdressing, which is why we are all here. I have seen a few comments on this and other threads saying something to the effect that if I can't pass as a female then what's the point of dressing at all? If that is how you feel then I am happy for you that you can pass. Others know that they would never be able to pass and just wearing panties, pantyhose or whatever, might be all they are comfortable doing and that makes them happy. They are still crossdressers. I think if you are putting on any article of clothing in the attempt to feel or look more feminine then you are crossdressing, even if no one else sees it.
I'm getting a headache.....
I am a vessel of the goddess. Let me express my calling to a feminine life through nurturing love and relatedness.
Yes, it's crossdressing - but perhaps "partial" crossdressing. I doubt whether a woman wearing a male shirt or another item of "male" clothing would think of herself as crossdressing. That, I think, is because of intention: if I underdress in, for example, a bra, panties, tights, etc I am doing it because I want - intend - to experience wearing female clothing but the woman in a man's shirt probably just thinks of it as a shirt. She will certainly not be worrying about whether soemeone might notice the male item.
There are too many variables to try to narrowly define crossdressing.
If a male went to Halloween fully dressed a female one time, is he more of a crossdresser than someone who underdresses regularly?
If I dress only on Thursdays, am I not a crossdresser the rest of the week?
People have their own definitions what crossdressing means to them. One persons crossdressing might be genderless or non-binary to another. I feel like crossdressing is an umbrella term that can cover many variations, not so much specific terminology.
Rebecca Bas
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