Asked out on a date

[jessicabf]

So yeah, this is a new experience. I have been asked out on a date? with a guy.

So what are things I should plan for??

- for now, I?m thinking? what if I need to use the restroom?!

Anything else?

(My SO knows and was part of the setup.)

TIA

[cindylouho]

I can see why, you must be so giddy!

[Kris Burton]

(My SO knows and was part of the setup.)TIA

I'm curious and puzzled - what does this mean?

[jessicabf]

She is part of the arrangement, it is with a few of her friends. It isn't meant to be sexual. Just the experience of being asked out and going on a nice date.

They thought it up, since they know about my alter-ego.

[Kris Burton]

Interesting...I haven't heard of such a thing, but I'm quite intrigued. The guy in question is in on this also, right? If so, it sounds like it could be fun, and fantasy fulfilling for all. Do tell us how it goes!

[jessicabf]

Kris, Yep he is fully aware. And is fine with it...

Yeah. I'll tell how it goes. Still trying to decide when/where. Any suggestions? There was a chat about Vegas.. going to Gordan Ramsey restaurant.

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Natalie, any suggestions on "go full in"?

[jessicabf]

Wow. So many responses!

I'll see if I can hit them all...

I understand the thought to do dry runs. It's a good idea, just means I would have to delay my date!

Yeah, my SO and friends will be in a nearby booth/table as support (and likely lots of giggles).

As far as the sexuality of it all, sure CDing has that component since we are sexual beings. But not everything has to be focused on that, IMO. I mean, what's the goal? If it is to "be a woman" then focusing on the non-sexual parts of femininity is good. Women don't get aroused by wearing a bra and skirt. This is a subject for a long other thread, so I'll end it there. In this case, it is focused on enjoying the feminine experience of a polite date, that's it.

No worries about getting drunk. Ain't gunna happen.

Great advice on having him order. It's my voice I worry about. I don't have an overly masculine voice, but have never tried voice training. My SO tried to get me to practice in the car the other day. Just ended up laughing alot.

There isn't any chance of being left alone with no ride. So I'm good there.

Motivations of my date? Honestly I don't claim to know completely. He isn't an entire stranger, as we have met before. Never would have thought he would ask me out one day. Haha! Is he interested in a CD'er? Maybe, I will ask over desert.

Good to know about the restroom. I was worried I would have to insist the place have a unisex restroom.

At first we were thinking formal, but it may turn to semi-casual... I look good in my jeans (with my hip/butt pads).

As far as makeup... I have to admit, my skills are raising above my SO's in some areas. Her sister is jealous of my make up brush kit. I have the wig in my profile pic... deciding now if I should find another. *thinkingface*

And YES, I am very thankful to my SO. I know many here have less positive situations, but in my case, she and her sister have been the driving force in many ways. I'm just trying to keep my skirt from flying up during the ride!

Thanks again ladies for all the advice! If I do the solo thing first it may be awhile before the date and there fore any reports on how it went.

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Hey docrobbysherey, I didn?t see your post when I posted my reply?.

That is a great way to think of it. First time out! Just with friends?. on a date? okay, so a little different, but point taken!

The guy is totally aware of the situation. I think he likes the idea of being ?used financially? more than dating a ?guy in a dress?. But it should be fun.

The goal is for all to have fun. I?m sure after the date we will all chat about it, have some laughs and down the road have some interesting inside joke giggles when not ?enfem?.

[TheHiddenMe]

It sounds like you, your wife, and SIL have it under control. So just go for it, have fun, and report back here, because we will all be interested how it went.

One more revisit on the bathroom issue. If your wife and SIL will be at the restaurant, just have one of them go with you. I've done that with my girlfriends before (gone solo too). But I always remind my girlfriends that I don't like to chat "over the stalls", because I don't want others in the restroom hearing my guy voice.

And as to your voice, it's really not that big of a deal. The wait staff are generally trained to be professional and respectful.

It's interesting the guy has his own reasons for doing this (rule #1: every guy has a kink). Sounds like your "friend" has a bit of a findom thing going on, not only with you, but also your spouse and SIL (a/k/a the "ringleaders").

Again, do it, have fun, report back. And pictures, of course!

[Natalie5004]

If you want the full experience. Go full in. You are a woman.

[Megan77]

Jessica your one lucky girl

[jessicabf]

Thank Megan, hope it works out as nicely in reality as it seems it should in my head.

[MonicaPVD]

- Go to a place where there are lots of people. The anonymity and energy in the room will be super helpful.
- Don't worry about a thing.
- You are presenting as a woman, so use the women's restroom.
- Don't drink a lot of alcohol. This is your first rodeo and you don't need to give the pink fog any further encouragement.
- Relax and enjoy yourself.

[jessicabf]

Thanks Monica! Great suggestions.

Dark subdued restaurant, or a loud and bright one?

[Kitty Sue]

Sounds like a great experience. I wish you all the best.

[Debs]

Have you experienced going out dressed before ? sounds like you havent ? , otherwise uusing the girls rest room wouldnt be a question , sounds like youve never been out dressed before in public ?, if not, your cramming a whole lot of experiences into one night out, your senses will be overwhelmed. but hey who am I to stop you go girl !!!!

[TheHiddenMe]

Thanks Monica! Great suggestions.

Dark subdued restaurant, or a loud and bright one?

One with good food?

I've never been at a restaurant with a man before but plenty of times with a girl friend, our TG group, or solo. Never been an issue.

The only thing the choice of restaurant might influence is how you dress. The nicer the restaurant, the classier your outfit.

And if you need to use the restroom, you use the ladies. It won't be an issue.

And if your wife and her friends set this up, you better be really nice to your wife.

[ronny0]

OMG, what a dream come true...... Good Luck and ENJOY!

[MonicaPVD]

Dark subdued or loud and bright restaurant? That depends on your comfort level being out dressed. It has been my experience that in loud and bright restaurants people subconsciously zero in on their immediate companions and disassociate from the rest of the room. Dark, subdued restaurants often lead to wandering eyes across the room. So, it's ultimately up to your comfort level. The trick is for you to master the ability to zero in on your date and tune out everyone else. Otherwise, every time some random person accidentally locks eyes with you, you will be thinking it's because your makeup isnt right or whatever. Bottom line: people are self absorbed and don't care about you unless they are directly engaging you. Have fun!

[jessicabf]

Deb, nope this will be my first time out! Wow what am I thinking?! Excited? Yes. nervous? Definitely.

Thanks Monica! Hm. Will have to think on that!

[MonicaPVD]

If this is in fact your first time out dressed, ever, I strongly suggest that you set aside some time for a solo trial run in a social setting. You do not want to be in a situation where you panic or freeze or whatever, and then you want to get out of there right away but, oh yeah, you came in Gaston's car and now you're either stuck or figuring out a plan b. In short, get yourself to a bar or restaurant asap just so you already know what it's like to walk in and negotiate that kind of space while dressed. It will make you a better woman.

[Rachelakld]

As Monica says - do a test run.
Personally I prefer to see what I'm eating and whom I dating - so light and vibrant works for me (others are to busy with their lives to be concerned about anyone else, even Cders)
Pay your share (equal rights etc).
Don't be surprised by stubble rash if you kiss each other goodbye
Have fun and most importantly.....
TELL US HOW IT WENT

[CharlotteCD]

I'm confused. If it's not sexual, what makes it a date? Isn't that just meeting up with somebody while dressed?

[Kris Burton]

Charlotte ... shhhh ....just enjoy the fantasy!

[SaraLin]

I hate to be the buzz kill here, but it seems a bit "chancy" to me.
Pink fog,
"handsy" date,
nerves,
SO's reaction if you had TOO good of a time,
etc.

Still - it sounds like a dream-come-true situation.

I've gotta ask: what will your SO be doing while you're on the date - Staying home? tagging along? Watching from the shadows? On a date of her own?
Also - why hasn't she suggested something a little less dramatic, like the two of you having a girls' night out together? If THAT goes well, then maybe the date night.

[Sometimes Steffi]

I've never gone on a date with a guy. Not really my thing. But this is your fantasy not mine. Go for it and have fun.

I have met CD/TG/TS girls in a restaurant many times. Mostly as some kind of a CD group meetup, but many times with a CD, and sometimes her accepting wife also. My first time out I met with a gurl from here at a restaurant/bar for lunch.

If I'm meeting a gurl that I've only met online and never FtF, I have security protocols in the back of my (pretty little) head for safety purposes. For example, I've asked someone I trusted if I'd be safe with gurl x. This was when she was picking me up and I was going in her car when I was out of town on business. I've also done recon on the venue that we're going to to make sure that i would feel safe.

But since this was all set up by your wife and her friends, it would seem safety is ensured.

You have only 3 decisions to make: (1) what to wear, (2) what to order for dinner and (3) whether you date gets a kiss when you part. It sound like it could be great fun.