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Thread: Find yourself overthinking

  1. #1
    Silver Member Maria 60's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2010

    Find yourself overthinking

    Have you ever found yourself, let's call it overthinking or looking to much into something and tiring your brain over thinking. This week was a busy week full of family functions, I find myself asking my wife questions of when we are going?, what time to go? Not because I want to know for myself but to work my dressing around the schedule. I noticed yesterday when my wife was meeting at her sisters house to have there makeup done professionally for a function we had last night. Her sister called Friday night and her A/C wasn't working at her house and my wife volunteered our house. I instantly start asking questions, what time are they coming, how long do you think it will take?. I was already planning what time I would have to be undressed and what time limit I would have once they leave and I noticed that I was doing this extra thinking all week. No wonder I'm so tired all the time, I'm over thinking everything. Even this morning my wife has to go out with my daughter, yesterday I blasted her with a thousand questions. Is she coming here or is my wife picking her up?, what time is she coming, how long do you think you will be out? will she be coming in when she drops off or will she go straight home?
    Wow! I'm going to drive myself crazy at this rate of overthinking.

  2. #2
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2013
    The Devil is in the Details.

    I don't see you overthinking but making sure all the details are covered. Failure to do this would result in somebody seeing something you didn't want them to.

    Yes, it's a lot of work.

    Hopefully things will slow down soon so that you can dress and "relax" the way you want to.

  3. #3
    Platinum Member kimdl93's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Going to seed!
    I can understand becoming anxious to dress fully, particularly the challenge of finding times when you can do so without being interrupted or surprised. There is no solution to having a busy life.

  4. #4
    Exploring NEPA now Cheryl T's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    I used to do that when my time was less my own. It got to be too much and thankfully now I never think about it.
    Now if I'm dressed and the wife says "we have to go to X" I just say to myself "Ok, I'll just change again when we get home". No stress, no worries.
    I don't wear women's clothes, I wear MY clothes !

  5. #5
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2010
    Western Washington
    It use to be an element in my planning time, and it was not exclusive to cross dressing time availability. As relates to cross dressing there was a time when I was grabbing at "crumbs of time." I read all the time on this forum of slipping into some women's attire for a minimal amount of time. I think that feeds on a person. How do I satisfy a craving? Decades ago the only time I had to be en femme was when my wife took our kids with her to a church nursery/Sunday school when she was the nursery attendant. I had about two hours on a Sunday to be en femme. It drove me nuts. Now, forty years later with a fully retired unappreciative wife there is zero time. It no longer drives me nuts but it would be nice to have at least a full 24 hours of alone time.

  6. #6
    Aspiring Member April Rose's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2017
    I don't think it's just a crossdressing thing. It's inherent to having a secret OR a family life. I notice it's a little less of an issue now that I'm alone. That doesn't mean I'm happier alone. I miss my wife and her complications every single day.
    I am a vessel of the goddess. Let me express my calling to a feminine life through nurturing love and relatedness.

  7. #7
    Gold Member bridget thronton's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Michigan USA
    I am planner in most aspects of my life and that includes dressing time

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jul 2021
    My wife will tell me one of the kids is coming over, and my first thought is Crap, I gotta change clothes!

  9. #9
    Gold Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    I have similar feelings while I have my Doctor Visit, a No Bra Day, Bummer

  10. #10
    Aspiring Member Heather76's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2022
    Coastal SC
    I do keep track of my wife's schedule more than I used to. But, she also keeps track of mine. She and I have always been home bodies and really don't entertain much. With our recent move, we have no family anywhere within 900 miles. Because we live in a gated community, anyone coming to visit has to let us know in advance so we can let the guard know who we expect. I know when my wife leaves home where she is going (grocery shopping, book club, etc.) so I know how long I have to enjoy dressing. She also tends to call when she's on her way home from trips over 2 hours or so that gives me time to do whatever it is I want to do before she gets home. If I have to carry groceries in, I will change outer clothes so Heather isn't visible to the outside world as I unload the car. If I know I won't be seen by others than my wife, I may or may not change. I'm glad I don't have to think a lot about it.
    It's never too late to enjoy a happy childhood.
    Live each day as though it's your last 'cause one day you'll be right.
    I'm finding the more feminine side of me...and I ❤️ this adventure.

  11. #11
    Member TAG's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2022
    Sounds like a lot of stress you don't need.
    Just go with the flow and don't dress if its a problem with company over.
    Being "out". single and retired has been wonderful.
    No unnecessary things like that.
    Last edited by TAG; 06-19-2022 at 05:14 PM.

  12. #12
    Aspiring Member Debbie Denier's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2021
    Merseyside UK
    I am always over thinking . A bit OCD about dressing time. Trying to think ahead and predict or estimate timescales. It drives the family crazy. I have learnt to adapt and try to make collapsible plans at short notice .Sometimes on impulse the family will decide to go out last minute for a few hours . This results in unexpected time alone. So there are unexpected bonuses.

  13. #13
    Member Marissa Q's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2021
    SF Bay Area, CA (US)
    Quote Originally Posted by TAG View Post
    Being "out". single and retired has been wonderful.
    Well said and can confirm.

  14. #14
    Platinum Member alwayshave's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
    Washington, DC
    Maria, almost all stress is self inflicted. You need to take advantage when the time is available and not stress about when it is available.
    Please call me Jamie, I always_have crossdressed, I always will, "alwayshave".

  15. #15
    Join Date
    Jul 2018
    I understand the anxiety of working out when opportunities will arise to dress. Best to try and chill and just accept whatever happens. Otherwise you will spend half your life juggling diary dates in your mind.

  16. #16
    Gold Member Helen_Highwater's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Midlands UK
    Fail to prepare, prepare to fail and then there's the P's: Proper Planning Prevents Poor Performance.

    While there may possibly be an element of over planning, getting things right can take the stress out of the important bit, the time you spend dressed. I've often said that if I'm going somewhere unfamiliar while enfemme I always try to look at Goole Street View as a way of recceing what I'm going to encounter. A little familiararity keeps things calmer.

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