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Thread: Trans, CD, or what? How do u know what u r?

  1. #76
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    Quote Originally Posted by docrobbysherry View Post
    I believe only when you're free to dress the way and as much as u like can u decide how far u wish to go with your dressing!
    So true!! One of the reasons why I feel really lucky to have a boyfriend, who has been very accepting, supportive and encouraging of me from day 1 in our relationship. As for who I am, I'm a happy CD who definitely feels like a beautiful woman when dressed!

  2. #77
    Senior Member Davina2833's Avatar
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    Petrale,

    Beautifully said you are so right...

    Davina

  3. #78
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    Quote Originally Posted by Genifer Teal View Post
    It's why you do it and what you want from it. A friend of mine is transitioning and I'm learning so much from watching her progress. She genuinely has dysphoria among other unrelated issues but I see the difference between her and me. That doesn't take away from my situation which I put more like "I'd rather be" as opposed to "I have to be". Even with all that she wants to keep her manly part and I could care less about mine. I joke if it were gone I'd have one less thing to hide and clothes would fit better. Those would be my main thoughts. Transitioning really would just be a preference for me not a necessity. A long time ago I didn't think that was enough reason. Now I see it can be. Seeing how comfortable I am spending most of my time as a woman the reasoning behind it is kind of less important now. It would just feel right to me to transition. I guess that's how I know what I am.
    I've had a couple of good turns in my life over the past months, starting around last Christmas, and that's let me go pretty much full time. It's been a revelation, but I am in a similar situation as you.

  4. #79
    Junior Member DaniellaUK's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by docrobbysherry View Post
    Just to remind everyone. This thread is NOT about who u r or what u call yourself.

    Also like Karren, I don't care what u r. I want to know HOW u determined that's what u r!
    Sorry for bringing this back up, I know it's been done over and over. Some really interesting replies.

    This is HOW for me...

    Through my counsellor, she took me on a journey of self discovery, she handed me the keys, I opened the door and can never go back. I was in turmoil before counselling, now I am in a whole new world of turmoil. Before counselling I had never even considered I was anything more than a CD but knew something wasn't right. Now when I look back through my life there are so many things that happened. Starting in my teens when a group of girls I was best friends with used to tell me all the time I should have been a girl, they even started calling me Jeanetta. Throughout our marriage my wife has said a million times due to my behaviours or ways or when I forget to scream in a masculine voice; "My god you should have been a girl" or "You are such a girl.". I have stopped seeing my counsellor which has not been a good move.

  5. #80
    Member *ROXY*'s Avatar
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    For me it's still a bit of a grey area. I love dressing and feel sad when I do not, even with feminine jeans and tees it's not the same as a skirt and boots.
    I think with me, and possibly with quite a few others, being 6 foot, broad shouldered, big feet, deep voice is too much to overcome. I'd never feel that I'd pass (and I know that's a phrase that a lot of people hate). I know it's not about fooling people you are a woman but simply blending in. If I could just be me, in a dress, sometimes makeup and wig sometimes not without any repercussions I'd settle with that.
    Foxy Roxy has entered the building

  6. #81
    New Member wendylovescd's Avatar
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    Seems like it was mentioned before, but for me the pandemic and having a full day pretty much every day re-ignited full dressining after many years of not but has revealed to myself I squarely in the crossdresser realm and if anthing, still slightly fetish-driven vs wanting to be a woman.

  7. #82
    Resident Polymath MarinaTwelve200's Avatar
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    Seems to be pretty simple when you have definitions. A homosexual (or bisexual) is attracted to those of the same sex. A Trans wants to be or identifies with the same sex. BOTH are known to cross dress. while a "crossdresser" proper, just cross-dresses without the aforementioned "complications". An activity that is shared , but with different SETS of motivations.----all three being "different animals" altogether.
    Last edited by MarinaTwelve200; 09-30-2022 at 04:54 PM.

  8. #83
    Junior Member NewSally's Avatar
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    I'm in very much the same camp as you are Roxy - tall, broad, size 13 shoe and deep voice. Makes passing or even blending in virtually impossible. That doesn't mean I don't enjoy doing what I can with what I've got while also keeping it all away from wife's prying eyes.

  9. #84
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MarinaTwelve200 View Post
    Seems to be pretty simple when you have definitions. A homosexual (or bisexual) is attracted to those of the same sex. A Trans wants to be or identifies with the same sex. BOTH are known to cross dress. while a "crossdresser" proper, just cross-dresses without the aforementioned "complications". An activity that is shared , but with different SETS of motivations.----all three being "different animals" altogether.
    Definitions r fine and good, Marina. But, u haven't said which u identify with or how u found that out!
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  10. #85
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    I was a CD first and maybe just maybe because of that mode of thinking led (predisposed) me to being bisexual.

    If I was going to place it in a point of time it would have to be my first homosexual relationship at around 13-14.

    At 53 I'm still very much a CD and still very much bisexual. I've also had some bouts with dysphoria. I am going to go out on a limb here and say that I am somewhere on that rainbow spectrum. Where exactly, I'm not sure.

  11. #86
    Senior Member April Rose's Avatar
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    1) am I CD Trans or what? Yes.
    2) How do you know what you are? By the way I've interacted with the world since I was 4 or 5.
    I am a vessel of the goddess. Let me express my calling to a feminine life through nurturing love and relatedness.

  12. #87
    OrdinaryAverageGuy probably captured my view the best.

    That said, I am probably going to upset some people with the following--I apologize in advance...

    I once looked at the labels and tried to fit myself into a category. Unfortunately, the LGBTQ... community really turned me off and in some ways makes me embarrassed to be myself as I don't really want to be associated with the political movement that has become. I do think that every person is absolutely unique, so trying to put people in a particular box only serves political ends. On the one hand, that political movement has made it a little bit easier to be open about wearing the clothes and expressing myself as I feel most comfortable, but now when people see me they immediately want to put me in that political "box," which I do not want to be put in. Can't we just be ourselves and not be judged in any way at all?

    Brenn
    https://balletflatsformen.wordpress.com/

  13. #88
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    Just goes to show everyone, what you look like, how you dress, Doesn?t mean anything. We should stop Pigeon hole everyone into a class of people. We are all different, we all have different wants and happiness. No two people are the same

  14. #89
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    Thot provoking post, Retro! Equating your gender and sexuality? If figuring out your gender was only as easy as figuring out your sexuality!

    Everyone's pretty much atttacted to either men, women, or both.

    Where as genders r a million points of lite between male and female. And, even some others outside that spectrum!

    Quote Originally Posted by RetroChrissyCD View Post
    I was a CD first and maybe just maybe because of that mode of thinking led (predisposed) me to being bisexual.

    If I was going to place it in a point of time it would have to be my first homosexual relationship at around 13-14.

    At 53 I'm still very much a CD and still very much bisexual. I've also had some bouts with dysphoria. I am going to go out on a limb here and say that I am somewhere on that rainbow spectrum. Where exactly, I'm not sure.
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  15. #90
    Member Misty_cder's Avatar
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    I am simply a man who enjoys wearing women's clothing and have no desire to transition.
    I am just a guy who enjoys wearing women's clothing and there is nothing wrong with that.

  16. #91
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    And, you've known that since what age?
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  17. #92
    Senior Member DianeT's Avatar
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    I am what Misty_cder just described. No female persona (and in all fairness not much TG identification), no "real me" epiphany once dressed, just the pleasure of looking great once dressed in what my heterosexual mind considers spectacular.
    Ah, and no AGP either. Not interested in making love to myself (supposing AGP ever was a thing to begin with).
    Last edited by DianeT; 10-01-2022 at 05:58 PM.

  18. #93
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    I have thought about this too, I feel like the main things holding me back are losing my family and friends so, until I get to a point where that seems like a conversation I?m going to have then I?ll have it. But for know I?m happy when I get my Olivia time here and there

  19. #94
    Platinum Blonde member Ressie's Avatar
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    I think I've always been on the line between crossdresser/transexual yet still somewhat in the closet.
    Last edited by Ressie; 10-07-2022 at 10:57 AM.
    "You're the only one to see the changes you take yourself through", Stevie Wonder

  20. #95
    Member Misty_cder's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by docrobbysherry View Post
    And, you've known that since what age?
    That is a good question. When I first started dressing at a young age, it was a fetish / sexual turn on for me. As I got older, my desire changed from a fetish to just enjoying the styles and fabrics of women’s clothing. There was a short period where I really wanted to be passable, but with my body frame, I came to the conclusion I am a MIAD. To respond more specifically to your question, I have to say it was in my late 30’s when I realized I just enjoyed wearing women clothing.
    I am just a guy who enjoys wearing women's clothing and there is nothing wrong with that.

  21. #96
    Aspiring Member KymG's Avatar
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    I dont believe in labels, but I would say im a hetero cd.
    I like a temporary indulgence but wouldnt want it all the time.
    That said ive been doing it more often but still happy as a male.

  22. #97
    Member 1Ladyjade's Avatar
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    I saw a poll started the other day. What are we?
    Gay or Bi Sexual.
    I commented where is the hetero sexual option. CD has nothing to do with sexuality.
    I went back to see other responses and the poll was deleted. Young people are confusing the whole thing. I see it all the time on Reddit. Someone cross dresses. And then asks should they keep going? I always say you dress for yourself. If you feel good while dressed then yes.
    Dressing does not decide your sexuality.

  23. #98
    Resident Polymath MarinaTwelve200's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by 1Ladyjade View Post
    I saw a poll started the other day. What are we?
    Gay or Bi Sexual.
    I commented where is the hetero sexual option. CD has nothing to do with sexuality.
    I went back to see other responses and the poll was deleted. Young people are confusing the whole thing. I see it all the time on Reddit. Someone cross dresses. And then asks should they keep going? I always say you dress for yourself. If you feel good while dressed then yes.
    Dressing does not decide your sexuality.
    Cross-Dressing (The Verb) is something SHARED IN COMMON with Straights, gays and Trans---but often with different reasons. Cross-Dressing does not define which of these groups you belong to.

  24. #99
    formerly: aBoyNamedSue IamWren's Avatar
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    Marina,
    I don’t know why it is that you have the misinformed notion that trans people crossdress but that is categorically false.

    A trans woman may wear the clothes from the men’s aisle if she isn’t passing OR she simply feels it’s safer for her to do so. But I don’t think that’s what you mean. And she certainly isn’t crossdressing for the same reasons that a person who identifies as a MAN, wears a dress.

    What I think is that you have somehow performed the mental gymnastics to see trans women as men wearing dresses. When a person who was assigned male at birth but has determined that she is a woman wears women’s clothing… she is not crossdressing.

    I have constantly seen you conflate the idea that trans people are somehow lumped in as a category of crossdresser or somehow gay men. That is patently false!

    I haven’t done years and years of introspection, come to the precipice of having my marriage implode and go through the physical pain of medical transition to have my identity as a trans person lumped in with gay men and men who like to wear women’s clothing.

    You sir, need to do more research.
    I am not a woman nor am I a man... I am an enby. Hi, I am Wren.

  25. #100
    Senior Member TheHiddenMe's Avatar
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    Once again, gender is not the same as sexual attraction, but I am not going down that rabbit hole.

    As for me, I am a male who occasionally likes (loves) to present as a female traditionally dresses, which is pretty much the Wikipedia definition of a crossdresser.
    I'm Sun-Dee at Kandi's Land; read about my outings here:

    https://www.kandis-land.com/author/dee/

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