Why do you crossdress?

[P_Alexis]

I have been asked by my wife since she has found out. Why do I cross dress? She thinks I want to dress as a woman all the time. That is not the case. I enjoy dressing en femme about three times a week. On the weekends I'm normally en femme in the morning until we have to run errands. I do it once during the work week in which I go to a local bar in full dress & makeup to have a couple drinks & enjoy myself. For me it's a fulfillment. I feel it makes me feel whole meaning the part of me that was missing for the longest time. I now find myself getting a little excited but not over excited. It makes me feel younger than what I am, currently 51 turning 52 this year. All my reasons to her are too vague. I'm trying to better explain myself to help her, so she accepts my cross dressing. What are your reasons?

[Kris Burton]

When i first came out to my wife, she asked the same question of me. I rather inarticulately bumbled through an answer, trying to describe the sensuous, euphoric feelings, living in the moment, etc. At one point she stopped me and said "Oh, you want to feel sexy!" I knew then she got it, and we were going to be OK.

[CarlaWestin]

So, they can see that it fills a desire and still have to ask.
I think they need a reassurance that they are not the cause.
Could she have possibly been hinting why so much?

[Jacqueline Vivaldi]

I cross dress because I want to look and feel like a female in every possible way. It is now a joy. I love to get fully dressed and look elegant and pretty, even alone at home, but I do enjoy walking down a street or into a restaurant and have some people compliment me on my outfit. This was not always the case. In the early days, I purged many times and felt bad, but then I came to the realization that this is who I am naturally. After this mental process of self analysis many years ago, I always feel special when I am stylishly outfitted. Life is just beautiful.

[Teresa.Smith.VA]

The reasons why I enjoy cross dressing evolved over time, but I have always been totally honest about sharing those reasons with my wife. It's fair to say that we evolved together, which had the benefit of her understanding and full support. In many cases, my wife was able to help me understand my own compulsions before I was able to fully understand it.

The lesson learned was that the more I shared, the more support and participation I received. Of course many wives simply can not and will not even try. There are many understandable reasons for that which many times results in a DADT accommodation.

I pinch myself every day that I am one of the lucky ones who enjoys the high level of acceptance from my wife, which results in lots of fun time for us both, instead of conflict, misunderstanding, and hurt feeling.

[Teri Ray]

For me, I am not sure there is a good answer to this question. Might as well try to answer any similar question like "why do you like chocolate" or "why do you like sports" or "why do you the music you listen to". Some things in life are just personal preferences that really have no logical explainaiton. I suffered with trying to understand why I have this desire and never found an answer that makes sense. Once I gave up this effert to understand and just accepted my desire, life became easier. I enjoy my time enfemme and I am OK with not having the answer as to why I do. Once I accepted that my desire to dress does not make me a bad person the struggle to understand why left me.

I also like steamed broccolli with butter and parmesan cheese on top. I still don't know why? Maybe you girls can help me solve that question.

[AllieBellema]

I do it to let out a happier side of me. I do tend to smile more when I look in the mirror at myself after I dress up and see myself all feminine and pretty. For my mental health, that turns into a good thing. And I agree that male clothing is just boring compared to what women get to wear!

[Natalie5004]

"I like smoking my cigar but I take it out of my mouth once in a while."

[mbmeen12]

[/QUOTE]Nattelle5004 "I like smoking my cigar but I take it out of my mouth once in a while.[QUOTE].
That is an analogy I don't understand but ok....and as to the original post question, it accelerated with my ex who thought it was fun in bedroom ironically as to all things, I wanted more....dress for success etc..and it felt great.

[GretchenM]

Not everybody crossdresses for the same reason. Using a generalization that is way too generalized, we do it because it expresses the way we feel. Now that needs to be tied down better. The expression "I feel like a woman" ties it down a tad better. It is a motivation to dress in a way that matches the sense of self.

But that is only for those that lean more toward transgender. For crossdressers who do not feel that identity shift it may be sexual or it may just because they like the look and feel of women's clothes which are usually more colorful and comfortable than is often the case with men's clothes. Perhaps the message here is that there is no single reason that fits all, but many reasons that tend to be pretty individualized.

But if she accepts your crossdressing that is a big plus and not the usual pattern. Most women take a long time to reach the point of acceptance and I suspect a majority don't really get to that point. You are fortunate.

[DeeDee67]

I gave my wife a pair of my boxer briefs to try on and automatically she said No! End of that discussion. She realized that most mens clothing is uncomfortable. That answered the clothing issue but not the makeup which she can't stand. Sometimes a little mascara or eye shadow but not full on makeup. My wife has gotten use to my panty w wearing/dresses,bras and my long hair but not the makeup.

[Maid_Marion]

I find socialization intuitively obvious presenting female while it is awkward as a guy.

Marion

[Stephanie47]

My wife asked this question during "The Talk." I fumbled around trying to come up with some plausible answer. I had to admit to her, "I do not know why I do what I do!" I my mind there is a difference between how I may feel when I am wearing women's clothing and the motivation to do it in the first place. Why would a man risk all the negative consequences society heaps on cross dressers? Why not some other outlet? Why repeat the activity once it blows up in a guy's face? Some can easily suppress the desire while other are constantly haunted by it.

A counselor I see for combat related PTSD issues is of the opinion that each man or woman has some dna of the opposite gender within him or her. In some it is greater than others. I hang around with a combat support group of old guys. I am the sole guy who has not medicated with drugs and alcohol. In the past when I wanted to "escape" the demons of war, it was seeking calmness and serenity wearing women's attire brought on. That still does not explain why I as a single digit male child felt compelled wear my wear my mother's clothing.

[AmeeJo]

Nothing makes me feel sexier than being dressed as a woman. I love the rush and the feeling of euphoria I feel when I am dressed. I am slowly expanding my experiences outside of my private comfort zone and so far it has been wonderful!! I am finding lots of acceptance as well as assistance from the limited exposure to my femme life out of the home.

[alwayshave]

Alexis, as my forum name states I always have. I stopped questioning why a long time ago.

[marieclaire]

I think women's clothes are prettier than men's. I love wearing bras, panties and pantyhose.

[CynthiaD]

I never get tired of answering this question. I crossdress for many reasons. Here are a few.

1. Despite what it says on my birth certificate, I'm female. Always have been.
2. Yeah, I want to wear female clothing all the time.
3. When I look in the mirror, sometimes I see a man, sometimes I see a woman. The woman is me. I don't know the man.
4. It's hard to put into words, but when I see the woman in the mirror, I know why I do it. Words are unimportant.
5. When I pick out my outfit for the day, the only question in my mind is skirt or dress?
6. My male outfit is (like) a uniform. When I get home, I take off the uniform and put on my normal female clothing, which I typically lay out on my bed before leaving.
7. When I go clothes shopping, I head for the women's section. I don't know where the men's section is.
8. I feel naked without a bra.
9. I also feel naked without lipstick, dangle earrings, and a necklace.

Yes, I could wear male clothing 24/7. But why would I want to?

These are more personal feelings than reasons. But my personal feelings are my reasons.

To paraphrase something I heard on a TV show: if you're a crossdresser, no explanation is necessary. If you're not, no explanation is possible.

[kimmy p]

I prefer the clothes. I like feminine clothing. I actually look much better in make up and body shapers. A big part is that men's clothing is BORING. Women have a much larger choice of looks available to them. From style itself (dress, skirts, blouses, pantsuit, etc) to colors and patterns.

[Cheryl T]

After decades of dressing and asking myself this question I still haven't found an answer.
The only thing I can say is that it just feels right and makes me feel a way I have never felt any other way.

[Angela Marie]

I’ve always had a very strong feminine side. Dressing allows me to express that fully.

[Barbara Jo]

Personally, I just really enjoy feeling feminine and this includes wearing female clothes.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Alexis , I have been dressing for 75 years Now,

It is just who I am and It's just what I do, >Orchid**OO**

[MarinaTwelve200]

To "Take a "vacation" from myself. And in doing so , becoming completely someone else free from my own worries and responsibilities--even of "manhood" itself, and thus am able to relax and "UNWIND" entirely.---- and also with the "bonus of "feeling pretty" and turning myself "on". I need a good CD "fix" every two or 3 weeks or so.

[JackieD]

It?s just feels good or right. Something that makes you relax, Actually why ? IDK. Just seems right

[Misiokaku]

For me it is just about the optics/aesthetics. I just think women look better, they dress better have more options in dressing, styling and for me most importantly can do a lot more with their hair. I envy them for this and admire their looks. I don't want to be a woman, I just want those possibilities in hairstyling and dressing because i simply think women look better than guys. I try to look well as a guy too. But women just have more options.and i want those options for myself. I have thought about it for my whole life. The dressing part is not that important for me. The hair is. There are a lot of guys with beautifully styled hair in feminine styles. But it just looks better when the clothing matches. So this is my shallow reason it is just about the aesthetics of a woman wich I want for myself.