On a less fun and frilly note, I wanted to share that in January 2021, at age 43, I was diagnosed with YOPD (Young Onset Parkinson's Disease). I discovered it very early, so my symptoms are still relatively mild and manageable. I've had to make adjustments though. I sometimes feel physically exhausted at random times and need to rest. I also can't focus as intently for long periods of time before mental fatigue kicks in. I've had to switch to a less demanding/stressful job at work, which has actually been a silver lining. I feel like I'm focusing more on myself and my family, versus career, which is actually really good. I'm also exercising a lot more, which helps slow progression. And the medicine I'm taking helps a great deal. So I'm trying to be optimistic and look for the silver lining.
But among many other concerns, I am worried that as the disease continues to progress it may hinder or even stop my ability to crossdress. The MtF transformation process takes hours of work and focus, and only then can I even start enjoying "being" Camille by taking photos, dancing, and even perhaps taking a short walk outside. I worry that in 5-10 years I won't have the focus or energy to do it anymore, let alone the physical ability to take much of a walk outside. Or perhaps my hands won't even be steady enough to do makeup. And PD can dull your facial expressions - so perhaps Camille's pretty smile won't be quite as big and beautiful.
I know some people might consider the loss of crossdressing a trivial thing, but I know that you all understand the happiness it brings. My hope is that I'll still continue to dress and enjoy CD'ing for many years to come. But I just needed a safe place to express my fear that maybe I won't be able to.
Camille
