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Thread: Attractive...or attract?

  1. #1
    Senior Member michelleddg's Avatar
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    Attractive...or attract?

    Hello Lovely Ladies!

    We all want to look good. We primp, preen, pluck, powder and pad so as to be attractive in the mirror, attractive to our lady friends and, yes, attractive to men folk. As I am fond of saying, I wanna make the boys cry.

    But...from a distance, thank you! I'd be mortified to get hit on. I'm happily married, not into guys in any way, please keep your distance. Does that make me the ultimate tease?

    I once went to dinner with a fellow CD I did not know well. She really really wanted to end the evening with a good night kiss. That was years ago, and I still shudder thinking about it. Understandable, or overreacting?

    So, I want to be attractive...but not attract. How about you? Whatcha think?

    Hugs, Michelle

  2. #2
    Platinum Member
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    I really dress for myself?and my bar is pretty low. I seek to not be either laughable or terrifying. A few years back, I was on occasion offered a few drinks by guys and from a few women. Never been known to turn down a free drink, but at the time I was (I thought) happily married, so I was not interested in anything more. Now, I find myself single, but a decade away from the bar scene and still trying to rise above my low personal threshold for appearance.

  3. #3
    Miss Conception Karren Hutton's Avatar
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    I want to be pretty. And if that is attractive then so be it and if it attracts. I can deal with that (aka: faithful to my wife to the end).
    Come over to the dark side - We have cookies!

    .......My Photos

  4. #4
    Member Annajose's Avatar
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    I want to be atractive, I would be extremelly suspicious of anyone hitting on me, I cannot pass, well, maybe from a mile away.
    In any case I would probably be also very flattered.
    But of course, that would be as far as I would go, I am happily married and I love my wife. I am also not into guys at all, and fortunatelly, since many years back, when I see a very atractive lady, my only desire is to be able to look like her!
    So not to attract, for me anyway.

  5. #5
    ☁️☁️☁️☁️⛅️☁️✈️☁️☁️☁️ ☁️ Patience's Avatar
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    Yeah, I don't know about the kissing part.

    It's a bit of a catch-22, really. If your aim is to look feminine (and you do a great job, btw), the more successful you are at it, the more likely it is you will be attractive to men.

    With that in mind, it might be a good idea to have a few strategies in place in case you get hit on or get any kind of unwanted attention. In certain circumstances, it might make sense to have pepper spray.

    Being pretty is a hard job, but someone has to do it!
    ...throw off those chains of Reason and your prison disappears...

  6. #6
    Member TAG's Avatar
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    One thing you can do is wear a wedding band and engagement ring.
    I used to get hit on by guys but not being a drinker I never accepted a free drink.
    I would accept a dance from a guy or an occasional kiss after the dance.

    I agree with Patience 100%
    Last edited by TAG; 09-07-2022 at 01:17 PM.

  7. #7
    Senior Member Kris Burton's Avatar
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    For me, it's all about the fantasy. I do strive to be attractive, and if it attracts, so be it - the fantasy is enhanced. Not a deliberate tease, but someone who attracts that kind of attention - in fantasyland. However, if it were ever to happen in real life I don't know what I would do. So yeah, Patience, I need a plan if I ever go out publicly to a bar or gathering where this sort of thing might occur - and have it firmly in mind before I make a complete fool of myself.
    Last edited by Kris Burton; 09-07-2022 at 01:50 PM.
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  8. #8
    Happy Halloween! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    I get hit on a lot online. But, in real life my ugly old mug would stop a clock, much less a trans chaser!

    However, over the years I have been hit on by a number of nice men. Including one in a club 2 weeks ago rite after I put my mask on!

    I'm straight so don't accept drinks from strange men because I won't give them what they want and don't wish to be a pr---- tease!

    But, in all my years out meeting men? Not one of them ever wanted to kiss me, except one freak that insisted I let kiss my mask!
    Last edited by docrobbysherry; 09-08-2022 at 02:12 PM.
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  9. #9
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    it has been often said that generally, males dress to impress females and woman dress to impress other females.
    Of course, the exception to this is when a female purposely dresses to attract a male(s).

    I would wager that most of us also like to impress other females.
    Last edited by Barbara Jo; 09-07-2022 at 02:31 PM.

  10. #10
    Aspiring Member Fiona_44's Avatar
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    Michelle,

    Some CD's don't want anyone to pay attention to them at all when they are out & about. Maybe they are worried about the ramifications of being clocked or just simply want to go about their business without giving a hoot what others think. Other CD's however desire the attention of others in order to validate the fact that they do indeed appear to be a woman and are doing the correct things with regards to mannerisms or make-up or dress styles ...etc. But that doesn't necessarily make them a tease. When I went out in public en femme the first 2 or 3 times, I dressed very frumpy not wanting anyone to look my way. But now even though I dress stylishly to blend in most of the time, I occasionally wear a short mini-skirt or other short skirts or a short dress and march out with the attitude like "Okay people, here I am, go ahead and have a look!". I like the attention but am not trying to intentionally attract anyone in an overtly sexual manner. I also do not have any interest in men and if approached I would very nicely let them know how I felt.

    But your point is well taken. Being an attractive CD means that you will occasionally get approached by someone but the best thing is to anticipate that will happen and formulate a nice but clear response that will insure the situation will not escalate into something uncomfortable.
    YOLO

  11. #11
    Heisthebride Heisthebride's Avatar
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    I think everyone dreams of being attractive, people looking at you and envious of your beauty. But that’s just a dream. For myself, I try to look the part as best I can, so generally I will dress to the nines if I’m going out and will be seen. As I’ve gotten older I will do a more casual look, especially when alone around the house and working from home. I have no expectations of meeting someone or having a pass made at me, but I am happy to receive a compliment on my nails, makeup or dress.
    Rebecca Bas

  12. #12
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    I would love to dress and be attractive. To look good in my clothes. But at my size it will never be. You really don?t find that many attractive woman at over 6? tall. I kinda hide try to blend in. But I have my fantasy

  13. #13
    Super Moderator char GG's Avatar
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    If you end up attracting chasers, they won't be deterred by a wedding ring set or even a wife/gf sitting next to you. (This happened with my hubby). You have to be politely firm if you don't want that kind of attention. Typically, take care which venue you choose to limit or increase your chances of being hit on.

    Chasers usually know what to say to flatter their prey. They might fully know who the CDers are.
    Last edited by char GG; 09-07-2022 at 09:17 PM.

  14. #14
    Stockings and heels girl Linda Stockings's Avatar
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    I can agree, to some extent, with just about all the answers above. I would like to add that if you go out dressed enough times, sooner or later you will probably be hit on by some guy. In my case I wasn't expecting it or looking for it to happen. I was dressed in a navy blue skirt suit, blouse, nice wig, 31/2 inch heels, and nude pantyhose. It was in the late 90's. My makeup was light and (I hoped) natural looking. I was window shopping at a local Dressbarn. The owner walked up with a couple of carpenter contractors and she started telling them how she wanted the store display window changed. One of the contractors looked me up and down several times and finally said "OKAY.....". What was wrong was his tone of voice. I half expected him to follow up by suggesting we go behind the building for some nasty things. I felt rotten. I felt somewhat violated. It made me realize that if I blended at all it was only from a long distance. So I had thought I was presenting as a well dressed professional lady. There were some other times of being clocked. The worst time was by a plain clothed police officer in a shopping mall. Which I've described in detail in a previous post and won't bore you with the details here. Suffice to say he was very rude and made no bones about using a loud tone. So, I guess...... expect it, and be prepared for whatever way it occurs.

  15. #15
    Senior Member Geena75's Avatar
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    Given my penchant for showing off legs and higher hemlines, my attempts at being attractive could well turn to the 'attract' aspect, except that I am large, and otherwise not so attractive.

    Honestly, though, I don't think I would have a clue if I attracted someone. Never in my life have I been in the situation where someone was attracted to me on account of my appearance, at least to my knowledge. So, I am either very dense or very inexperienced, or both.

  16. #16
    Senior Member Heather76's Avatar
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    I think I've always been a realist. I'm just an average looking old guy and wouldn't expect anything more than looking like an average looking old lady. Regardless of how I look, I would like to blend. That may not be possible; but, that would be a goal. After reading many posts, I'm somewhat convinced blending may not be as impossible as I originally thought in that many have reported other people simply don't notice and don't care what other people look like. They are going about their own business and couldn't care less about the "other faces in the crowd."
    It's never too late to enjoy a happy childhood.
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    I'm finding the more feminine side of me...and I ❤️ this adventure.

  17. #17
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    If a CDer is supposed to dress according to his age, I am not the least worried. I am one of the oldest here. About the only male that might hit on me would be a boy scout working on his badge by offering to help me across the street.

    Ineke

  18. #18
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    My tendency is to dress for me. If someone were to consider me to be well put together, it would be a major accomplishment. I wish that side of my being attracted my wife. I have no delusions that anyone else is going to be attracted and that suits me fine.

  19. #19
    Member Debs's Avatar
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    my girlfriend is trans, she is gorgeous, and I have no problem whatsover in giving her a great big kiss, lol

  20. #20
    Just being true to myself Jolene Robertson's Avatar
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    I hear what you're saying, for most of us and I know for me we don't pass that well. I dress for me and try and be appropriate for where I'm going if I'm going out. I have only been hit on once (at a casino) and didn't handle it very well, I just sat there like a bump on the log and didn't interact with him at all. I wasn't prepared for anything like that, I wish I'd have at least talked to him, my wife was sitting across the isle from us and I'm not interested in anyone other than my wife but still should have spoken to him.

  21. #21
    Aspiring Member Debbie Denier's Avatar
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    I want to look as good as I can but do not want any unwanted attention .

  22. #22
    Oh to be an English Rose Jane G's Avatar
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    When I used to body surf winter waves I would occasionally get mistaken for a seal. Even had a few people take photos, then come over after I hit the beach and laugh about it with me. Less chance of me being mistaken for an attractive female I fear. Not that I go out much dressed these days. Though back when I was smaller, a young teen and ventured out far more, I do recall a few wolf whistles from afar. I never had the confidence to face my admires though.

  23. #23
    Platinum Member alwayshave's Avatar
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    Michelle, Of course I want to look attractive. I am also happily married. I have been hit on at a LQBTQ+ bar. It was one of the few times I have been out without my wife. I was just there to platonically dance with other women and politely demurred.
    Please call me Jamie, I always_have crossdressed, I always will, "alwayshave".

  24. #24
    Exploring NEPA now Cheryl T's Avatar
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    Attractive for sure.
    There's nothing like a compliment on your appearance to make your day.
    I don't wear women's clothes, I wear MY clothes !

  25. #25
    Administrator Di's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by char GG View Post
    If you end up attracting chasers, they won't be deterred by a wedding ring set or even a wife/gf sitting next to you. (This happened with my hubby). You have to be politely firm if you don't want that kind of attention. Typically, take care which venue you choose to limit or increase your chances of being hit on.

    Chasers usually know what to say to flatter their prey. They might fully know who the CDers are.
    Read the above and read it again .
    Chasers know exactly what to say and feed into your wanting to feel like a woman.
    Beware.

    About the kiss with the CD you met , anyone trying to persuade me to cross my boundaries would be kicked to the curb. What a jerk .
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    You forever and always will be my one and only true love . ❤️

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