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  1. #1
    Member AmeeJo's Avatar
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    I told my wife

    Well, AmeeJo is now public, so to speak. Our company finally left and after my wife got some well deserved rest I went in and told her I had something I wanted to talk to her about. I told her it was not as big news as my oldest when she came out as transgender but it was along the same lines. Then I just said it "I like to crossdress and have since I was 12". She was a bit surprised but did not show any anger at all. In fact it was quite the opposite. There was acceptance just not understanding. She did have some questions, of course. I answered every one without hesitation. We talked about how I got started and where I have progressed to. She was surprised to hear that I have a wardrobe and wanted to know where I kept it. She said I was really good at hiding it all these years as she never once suspected anything until I started getting my nails done and even then was not convinced it was anything more than a phase. I think she thought I have been dressing with someone else but I assured her I have not. She told me to bring my clothes into the house and I can keep them in the closet (anyone who sees it would think it was hers anyway). We are basically the same size. She thinks she might want to borrow something if she likes it. I feel so relieved to finally have this off of my chest and I don't think it could have gone better. I'm not ready to openly dress in front of her yet and I will not dress in front of my 14 year old but I'm in a much better place now. Oh, by the way, she had absolutely no issues with me telling my mother or my daughter first. She looked at it the same way I did as a way to test the waters before diving in.I'm sure there will be more to follow...
    We can only achieve what we dare to reach for.

  2. #2
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    Well done on taking such a big step, and I'm so glad it appears to have worked out for you.

    A bit of awkward boundary setting to come no doubt, but a great start.

  3. #3
    Junior Member Michelle Isgurly's Avatar
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    Good for you honey, a weight is off your shoulders 💖

  4. #4
    Senior Member Kris Burton's Avatar
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    Well done Ameejo! And how equally wonderful that your wife is accepting. No more hiding - the truth has set you free!
    www.flickr.com/people/194195593@N05/

  5. #5
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    Congratulations AmeeJo, you are very lucky to have such an accepting spouse.
    From my own experience you may get some follow-up questions but it sounds like you
    both handled it really well.

    Sophie

  6. #6
    Silver Member NancyTO's Avatar
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    A good outcome.

    Wonder if she will now allow you to borrow some of her clothes?
    If your not living on the edge, you're taking up too much room.

  7. #7
    Silver Member Frannie7's Avatar
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    Congrats, AmeeJo. I am very happy for you.

  8. #8
    Seasoned Member Rhonda Darling's Avatar
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    Ameejo, though we don’t know each other, nevertheless, I’m proud of you, girl. That was a huge step that you took that many here only dream of. I never told my late wife, and have regrets about that. My wonderful current wife was told as soon as dating got serious. She, like your wife, took it well, but she needed lots of research and lots of discussion in order to understand this facet of me so as to not perceive it as a risk to our relationship. You are off to a great start. Cherish her and by all means keep the discussion going. Be especially aware of any research she may do — there are many seeming professionals who consider us to be abominations who can be cured, or who see us as lost souls, or who attempt to pigeon hole us in definitions that don’t fit. Make sure she finds supportive research that reflects our reality as regular people who have a non-threatening characteristic/trait that actually make us better people. Having her join here and read about us, and perhaps joining the Female at Birth forum, might help her understand us more clearly. IMHO. YMMD.

    Best regards,
    Rhonda
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    Be all the woman that you can be!
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    . . . and now, On With The Show!

  9. #9
    Aspiring Member Debs's Avatar
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    Ameejo, deep breath, its a long way down !!!!, lol Always make her remember what she found on the first day, over the next 20 years or so it will waver and change, its not her fault or yours its life, go with the flow, but dressing will always be with you both now for the rest of your relationship, but yep big steps girl !!!, but if your like me and its in your xy jeans, you cannot ever let go, and always embrace it, it will work out ok in the end, wether its dadt for a few years etc , but its now part of your life, good caall girl. hiding it never works out

  10. #10
    Platinum Member alwayshave's Avatar
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    AmeeJo, I am so glad that your reveal went well. I realize it is a big step, fraught with real world consequences. Your wife's response was perfect.
    Please call me Jamie, I always_have crossdressed, I always will, "alwayshave".

  11. #11
    Super Moderator char GG's Avatar
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    Well done! She may have more questions in the future but this is excellent news.

  12. #12
    Senior Member Heather76's Avatar
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    That is GREAT!!! All those years of hiding and the stress that goes with it, has now vanished. With certain boundaries, you can now be you. Success stories are always wonderful to hear.
    It's never too late to enjoy a happy childhood.
    Live each day as though it's your last 'cause one day you'll be right.
    I'm finding the more feminine side of me...and I ❤️ this adventure.

  13. #13
    Platinum Member Crissy 107's Avatar
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    AmeeJo, That is wonderful and I am so happy for you both! Just a word of caution, even though on first blush she is accepting there may be some up and down times. You did it and so far so good, now you can exhale. You did good AmeeJo!
    Crissy

  14. #14
    Administrator Di's Avatar
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    Must feel so good getting this off your shoulders.
    Expect more questions just be honest .
    I am relieved for you.
    If you are a Genetic Female (Female at Birth) and would like to join us in the F.A.B. Forum, please follow the link.

    F.A.B. Forum Access

    Sherlyn,My beautiful sweet girl
    You forever and always will be my one and only true love . ❤️


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  15. #15
    Amanda countrygirl's Avatar
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    So happy for you.
    Amanda

  16. #16
    Member AmeeJo's Avatar
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    Thank you to everyone who has posted so far. I'm still on cloud nine with all of this. The first thing I did was to get my toenail color changed. The red is gone and I now have a nice candy apple green. She said they look nice but still a bit too dark for her taste. She did say it didn't affect her like the red did though so it'll take some time I think. I moved all of my tops into the closet already. I wanted to see how this went before I start bringing up my dresses. So far so good.
    We can only achieve what we dare to reach for.

  17. #17
    Senior Member Emily in the south's Avatar
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    So very happy for you AmeeJo. What a great milestone and you have such a nice future ahead.
    All the very best to you. Looking forward to your positive updates..

    Emily

  18. #18
    Member AmeeJo's Avatar
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    Thank you everyone! This has been an amazing afternoon and evening. We talked a bit more and one request she made was to change the color of my toenails. I didn't know that she HATES red nail polish. She initially told me she didn't like them when I first got them done but I assumed she was just surprised to see them. Apparently she has had an issue with bright red since she was a little girl. Who knew? I'll probably go in next week and get my toes redone and my fingernails as well. I am definitely going to take all of this SLOWLY. I am still relieved that my 43 year old secret is finally laid to rest.
    We can only achieve what we dare to reach for.

  19. #19
    Platinum Member Crissy 107's Avatar
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    AmeeJo, I would get some nail polish remover and clean them up tomorrow.
    Crissy

  20. #20
    Member AmeeJo's Avatar
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    They're gel so I have to soak it off. I'll go see my nail tech tomorrow. She'll hook me up.
    Last edited by AmeeJo; 10-31-2022 at 10:51 PM.

  21. #21
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    Whew!
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  22. #22
    Member NonbiNancy's Avatar
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    Congratulations AmeeJo! What a weight that's been lifted. There's nothing quite like that feeling of coming clean and then being accepted. I'm very happy for you.

  23. #23
    Gold Member bridget thronton's Avatar
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    Well done - you have a great wife

  24. #24
    Junior Member GraceM's Avatar
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    Ameejo, such great news, so happy for you both.

  25. #25
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    Congratulations Ameejo only another crossdresser can know the courage it takes to open up to a spouse so happy for you that it went well.

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