What if ?

[TheHiddenMe]

I am out to one person in my male life (save my wife and a couple of ex-girlfriends from many years ago). My friend is the mother of a adult non-binary child, born female, identifies as non-binary, and presents male. I decided to tell her because I thought my friend needed to know she had an ally who understood at least some of the the issues she and their child might face. She felt honored that I trusted her.

Today she sent me an email from the Trevor Project, which helps trans youth. Here is an excerpt:

In 2022, fewer than 1 in 3 transgender and nonbinary young people found their home to be gender-affirming, but acceptance from at least one adult can decrease the risk of LGBTQ youth attempting suicide by 40%.

So, unlike some posters think, when Maria and her wife intervene and try to persuade the parents they are absolutely doing the right thing. Read the above. Getting acceptance from one adult lowers the suicide risk by 40%. Their nephew needs an ally.

And, contrary to other posters, kids of today are FAR more accepting than those of a generation before. They have access to far more information on their phones than any generation before them. There have been demonstrations in schools supporting LGBT kids. The kids are alright; it is the adults who are the problem.

The misinformation is spread by individuals who wish to maintain power. There was a video lately of a woman speaking at a public meeting that while she was never sexually abused by a drag queen she was sexually abused twice in church, but those in power are trying to curry favor with the church.

And that spreading of misinformation cost five lives in Colorado Springs yesterday, based on all available reporting.

Maria, be there for your nephew. And if your drives keep you sane, keep doing them.

[DianeT]

So, unlike some posters think, when Maria and her wife intervene and try to persuade the parents they are absolutely doing the right thing.

Where did you see exactly posters saying that Maria and her wife didn't do the right thing?

And, contrary to other posters, kids of today are FAR more accepting than those of a generation before. They have access to far more information on their phones than any generation before them. There have been demonstrations in schools supporting LGBT kids. The kids are alright; it is the adults who are the problem.

And yet, you allude further in your post to a shooting that wasn't the making of an old timer. I don't say you are wrong, but you are painting a picture of the young society that seems a bit simplistic. Yes they have access to a lot more information. But that doesn't mean they know how to sort it out, compare point of views, and make up their own opinions without being influenced by all kinds of negative ones. I don't think the social networks, who favor emotions other thinking, are necessarily shaping a more tolerant future. And many people see the tolerance issue from their own situation and context. Depending on the streets and boroughs they walk, their origin, their family story, they may experience a very different reality from one another.

And if your drives keep you sane, keep doing them.

I don't consider the "my way or the highway" stance, with zero empathy for the wife, to be a recipe for lasting couples. I commend Maria for accepting to compromise. Maria isn't yielding, she's intelligently investing in her couple by adjusting to a new situation. One could call this business acumen, but in the end she may simply love her wife and wish to keep her happy and serene.

[Shelly Preston]

I can understand if parents have concerns for their children. I worry about the child when the parents blame the Goverment and Schools. Not to mention the disgust on the fathers face when his son walked in. It seems to me they have clearly no understanding of gender issues. I would say they are more worried about what people will think of them than their son.

I hope the son has some sort of support network.

[TheHiddenMe]

Where did you see exactly posters saying that Maria and her wife didn't do the right thing?

What I wrote is that Maria and wife were right to intervene to best serve their nephew. Having read a number of her posts, I know it's not the first time they have intervened on behalf of the nephew, and she and her wife are to be commended for doing so.

And the answer to your question is post 23.

As to young people, look at the voting results on campuses during the elections. In some cases, the votes for the more progressive candidates were in excess of 90%. Young people are specifically rejecting the "hate the LBGT" message some are sending.

Yes, there are a handful of young people who take action on their own using things we are not allowed to talk about on these boards. Do you think they came up with those ideas on their own? And, not so coincidentally, the same people who spread the "hate the LGBT" message happen to be the very same people who prevent actions against the things we can't talk about on this board.

I've made my opinions known, and I won't be posting further on this thread.

[Natalie5004]

Geena, this thread is all about risks and rewards. Which is why your post confuses me. Even in Calif. our mountains get snow. So, we all expect conditions after dark to become colder and more dangerous. U must have known that, too?

U already had your "reward" so taking that "risk" driving back dressed wasn't necessary was it? U had no reason to remain as Geena anymore and could have easily switched clothes before driving back. But, u chose not to. I wondered why?

It takes me up to an hour to dress to the 9's. But, about 10 minutes to get it all off, including makeup!

I dealt with snow back east for 50 years. It is different back there. Not so much snow and people know how to drive in it, mostly. Here a snow event is at 5000 ft or higher elevation mostly. The conditions are FAR WORSE in a California snow event. Trust me.

[DianeT]

And the answer to your question is post 23.

Thanks, I was wondering. You may want to check Dutchess' post again. She isn't saying Maria and her wife did anything wrong. She is just responding to Kelly about labelling parents as bigots (which Maria and her wife did not).

[alwayshave]

I worry about the child when the parents blame the Goverment and Schools.

Shelly, to those who believe sexuality is choice, it's easier to blame the government or school than themselves. We all no it is not a choice, unfortunately this young man's parents do not.