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Thread: Thank you for the confidence

  1. #1
    Silver Member Maria 60's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2010

    Thank you for the confidence

    Well one week into my "what If" post and trying to cut down my Friday drive I was sitting on the coach and my wife told me "I know you want to go, just go and if something happens we will deal with it together". I didn't hesitate and I got dressed and off I went.
    This time of year the police set up spot checks to control drunk drivers, they position themselves on roads that they trap you and you can't turn around. Well a few minutes into the drive by the time I seen the flashing lights it was to late, I'm now trapped and have to go threw the check. A few years ago I would have freaked out and had a panic attack and probably put my head and eyes down to the floor with embarrassment and probably try to remove as much fem stuff as possible. Just like a man who rolls up his sleeves before doing a chore, I hiked up my skirt, fixed my hair and touched up my lipstick and told myself "I could do this". I was now in the single row like a animal going to slaughter and I see the row of police officers. The first officer waved me to pass down the line until one officer waved me to stop. I opened my window and I automatically put my head high and staired him straight in the eyes, for a second and only a second he had a look like he seen a ghost, and in that second it gave me the opportunity to say "good evening officer how can I help you". The next thing they do is come in close so they can smell your breath when you respond to a question. He asked me if I had any alcoholic beverages tonight and he started moving closer to me, I moved closer to him and told him I didn't. He pulled away and told me to have a nice evening and I responded that I planned too. I know it's so minor but for me I was so proud how I handled that, I didn't even break a sweat and I was so confident. The next thing I thought about was this community. Thank you, thank you to this community and to everyone here for giving me the confidence, I could and would have never handled that situation so calm and confident without this place. I know for some this is nothing but for me for some reason it meant so much and I believe I owe it all to you. Thank you all.

  2. #2
    Silver Member Pumped's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2013
    Good story! Confidence goes a long way!

    Those DUI checkpoints can be funny. A buddy and some other friends went out one night, two cars. When they left the restaurant they ran into a DUI check point, they all had been drinking. My friend was in front and the cop asked hm if he had been drinking? By the way, he is a vodka drinker. "You bet I have! I had a couple drinks with dinner!" They told him to go on his way. The second car the lady driving had a small glass of wine and rarely drinks. When asked she stumbled, said no, and they had her pull over and did the drill then let her go. Knowing my buddy the two drinks was probably closer to ten. He is a well practiced alcoholic!

  3. #3
    Platinum Member alwayshave's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
    Washington, DC
    Maria, I'm so glad you made it through the checkpoint without a panic attack.
    Please call me Jamie, I always_have crossdressed, I always will, "alwayshave".

  4. #4
    Gold Member bridget thronton's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Michigan USA
    Well done Maria - you had done nothing wrong and owned how you appeared

  5. #5
    Aspiring Member Debs's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    North West UK
    its hard to stop the panic unless you realise that its not illegal to wear clothes of the opposite sex, or is it in your state/county Maria ?, Ive checked the internet and could not find any laws that would get you arrested for wearing clothes of the opposite sex, good job really, most women wear mens clothes, there would be thousands of arrests, lol

  6. #6
    Gold Member Helen_Highwater's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Midlands UK

    Confidence is what enables so many of us to go out. How often has it been written, " Head high, act like you belong there".

    Skulking around a store and the SA's will think your shoplifting. Go about your business just like any other shopper and you're ignored.

    I'm glad you've been able to come to some arrangement with you SO. You're encounter with the law shows just what you can achieve so who knows what's next for you.

  7. #7
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2020
    Great story Maria, For some reason just because we are wearing a dress most crossdressers think they are doing something wrong or illegal. Many times I would leave my hotel dressed and travel 200 miles home at first I was terrified that I might be pulled over on the interstate or have a flat tire but as time went on I actually thought it would be nice to have an interaction with law enforcement to build confidence and prove there is nothing to worry about.

  8. #8
    Silver Member Sandi Beech's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2019
    Southeast US
    Glad you kept your cool. That is always the best way to handle the situation.

    The last time I was caught in a road block, I was not crossdressed, but I was shocked that they had tow trucks lined up to haul off peoples cars. It seems in addition to drunk driving, a number are out there driving on suspended or revoked licenses, and that is another sure way to get into trouble. It goes without saying to always make sure you have your paperwork and license in order, especially true when crossdressed.


  9. #9
    Banned Read only
    Join Date
    Oct 2010
    Western Washington
    On the occasions when I do have the opportunity to go for an evening drive I make sure I have not consumed alcohol. That whether en femme or en drab. It's an old habit from driving with kids. Although, it is probably not illegal to wear women's clothing there is always the possibility a officer may make a person go through the assessment because he has a grudge against cross dressers. That's life. It's still an issue of risk vs reward. Minimize risk to enjoy the reward.

    Sandi, brings up a point. Know your state laws. In some states what is a civil infraction/ticket, maybe a cause to haul you into jail in another state.

  10. #10
    Member Valerie Louise's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    SE Wisconsin
    Awesome Maria, just awesome. Great read, well written, and your actions give us all a good example. Well done, girl!
    Just call me Val

  11. #11
    Silver Member Geena75's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2013
    Great reaction, Maria! Your response to the situation was perfect! I was out and bought a bottle of wine and was anticipating getting carded (some places do it as a matter of procedure). I was ready to show my ID with my male, bearded face and just answer any puzzlement with "I don't look like that right now, of course," but they just passed me through without checking. Maybe they wanted to avoid the scenario altogether.

  12. #12
    Oh my god, I'm a girl! jazmine's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Damn! ......It does get easier. After awhile it's like, "****, this is who I am..." I'm glad it turned out well with out any {blow-back}.... Peace!
    So I like dressing like girl. BIG DEAL!

  13. #13
    Senior Member Jenn A116's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2012
    lower right part of US
    Great example about facing your fear and overcoming it! Congratulations.
    Jenn A --- nothing fancy, just me.

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