Partners attitudes towards clothing

[CharlotteCD]

I have an attraction to lingerie and stockings, and that comes in the form of both wanting to wear it myself, and of wanting to see my wife in it.

She has zero interest in owning nice lingerie, and apparently doesn't feel sexy in it, doesn't see why anybody finds it sexy etc.

We do however share a love of jeggings, dresses and jumpsuits.

I often wonder if she doesn't care for clothing so much because it's always been there, she's always been able to wear it, so it's not even on her radar. Conversely, maybe I DO care because I haven't ever been able to wear it as normal attire.

Anybody else have similar or opposite situations?

[VS Fan]

Exactly the same here with regards to pantyhose, thongs, skirts, and other items. I also agree that I tend to wear things that I wish she would wear.

[kimdl93]

Interesting question. My first wife enjoyed wearing lingerie. My second did not. I think its a matter of personal preference.

[alwayshave]

My ex-wife once told me she doesn't look good in lingerie and therefore didn't want to wear it. I believe this is because lingerie is modeled by lingerie models, and a lot of women feel if they are not built like the model, there is no reason to wear the lingerie. I don't hold that opinion. I like lingerie on my wife who does not have a model's figure and on my chubby self.

[Crissy 107]

I think it goes back to how the SO’s were brought up. If their Mother embraced and enjoyed something then that, whatever it is, would be something they would also enjoy. I particularly observe that with makeup and nail polish.
There are always exceptions but generally I think it is true.

[JulieC]

I've noted before that to women, pantyhose are just another form of socks. To me, they are something entirely else. I don't think boudoir lingerie quit fits the same description, but I do think most lingerie is less about the person wearing it and more about the person who sees it. I once bought a sexy two piece lingerie set for my then girlfriend. She was very receptive and wore it for me once. But, I've never made that mistake again. Such gifts are really for me in that I would want her to wear it for me, and not for her.

I agree with alwaysshave. So much marketing is geared towards size 0 models with DD breasts. It's completely unrealistic. Victoria's Secret finally gave up their approach in this. They're now actually marketing to real people. Women have enough pressure in their lives to look a certain way (that is never achievable). Adding on lingerie is like the perfect insult added on to that.

[Gillian Gigs]

My wife can't stand to have to wear pantyhose. I have never seen her in a skirt either. Well she does wear dresses on occasions, but if she can get by without pantyhose she will. She totally thinks that I am nuts for liking to wear pantyhose, and personally, I love wearing skirts. She has never worn stay up stockings either. I think it all boils down to personal choice.

[Cheryl T]

I love stockings as well, but actually find that I rarely wear them anymore.
Since we retired I could be wearing them nearly every day but I just don't. I've become more casual in my style, which fits the area we are in. Now and then I just feel like being "dressy" and go all out, but it's rare anymore and truthfully I don't mind. I'm good with being just an average gal.
When we met she wore skirts and stockings all the time, but as time has passed that's been reserved for special occasions like weddings and such or for special nights. That's fine too. Times have changed, we have changed.
But since you've planted the bug today will be a stocking day for this lady.

[Natalie5004]

My wife loves to get dressed to the max for any event. As a matter of fact, she invents events to dress for.

I am expected to dress like Johnny Rose from Shitt's Creek. I would much rather dress like Moira.

[Jen.nd]

My wife doesnt like they way she looks in lingerie either even tho i tell her she is beautiful and i like they way she looks. I think its alot to do with how confindent your SO is. But i get where you are coming from because I wish i could wear lingerie and the sort for sexy time like allll the time hahaha.

[Joanne108]

I have to admit that the thought that was putting on forbidden clothing appealed to me when I started dressing! Now It?s about wow I think I might just look passable if I squint.

[docrobbysherry]

My ex and I had similar tastes in clothing up until she put on so much weight that she doesn't look good in anything.

When we divorced 25 years ago she left a lot of her sexy dresses in her closet. Which I still wear from time to time!

Even at 80 I hate "dressing to blend"!
But, that's all she's been doing for the last 35 years. So, I guess she has a lot more in common with many of u than Sherry and I!

[CharlotteCD]

I don't know if the forbidden thing was ever at the forefront of my mind. I think my focus was more on the shape, the textures and feel against my skin. Those elements really drew me in as my sister grew into her teens.

Bras have held a fascination for me ever since I first discovered hers, and I can remember every one I wore.

[Maria 60]

My wife on many occasions when she seen me sleeping wearing a bra or pantyhose she will ask me why do I enjoy punishing myself. She used to wear lingerie early in our marriage and then she said she wanted to be comfortable and warm instead. On one occasion I was wearing shiny and silky feeling pantyhose and I told my wife how amazing they felt. She told me she's never felt that great feeling wearing pantyhose. Then again most women have been wearing tights and pantyhose all there lives. I could already speak for my 2 year old granddaughter who begs us to remove her tights and seeing her happy reaction when she finally gets them off. My wife always tells me the biggest advantage of having a crossdress husband is that I understand how important it is to find a comfortable bra or any underclothes at any price.

[GaleWarning]

I have a different take on this thread.
My ex- had zero interest in being intimate.
So, zero interest in looking sexy.
She wore hosiery when she was working in an office, but stopped as soon as she stopped working.
So, I started.

[sara66]

I bought my wife some lingerie when we were first married. She promptly returned it. She doesn't like the way she looks in lingerie, I told her I did like it. No joy.
She is not a fan of pantyhose, but doesn't mind heavier tights in the winter. She does like wearing skirts and dresses. She will even wear heels.
Sara

[TheHiddenMe]

We can't explain to anyone WHY we like dressing in lingerie or dresses, but our female significant others are supposed to explain WHY they don't like wearing them?

Your wife just doesn't like them. She doesn't need a reason.

[Debbie Denier]

When 1st dating then married. Wife used to wear sexy lingerie stockings etc. After being married about 10 yrs . Fashions changed to practical and comfort. The1st items to go were stockings . Then panties changed to cotton. Special occasions such as weddings then special outfits and pantyhose are purchased. But thats it. I own more lingerie and nylons than my wife.

[Jillcder]

Same here Charlotte my wife has zero interest in nice lingerie.

[chrissy111]

My wife has always loved getting dressed up special as I call it. She has many events for her job which she needs to be dressed up for. She despises pantyhose, so she will always wear stockings

[CDMargret]

My wife used to wear nylons at the bank. Just hated them and still does. She will dress up in lingerie and wear nylons for me if I ask. Soon after play she is stripping them off like the are on fire. lol Now dresses, skirts and such she wears often and I buy her all the cute outfits I can find. Luckily we are the same size so I wear them too. Bonus! Bras have never rocked my boat much. I do have a few to hold the girls but usually I never wear them. Leggins have become a daily staple in my dressing. Shapermint brand are great with the silicone waist band to hold them in place. LOVE THAT.

[Deborah G]

My SO either critiques herself in lingerie, or doesn't see the need at the moment. Go figure... Me, I just ENJOY the experience of wearing all lingerie and hose! This has not changed for me since I can remember. I feel that alot of GG's are missing the boat on this one; what is more fem than lingerie and hose?

[Di]

MOD HAT

Just talking in general what attitudes toward clothing like the OP is talking about - fine
Some of the answers are just rude and against this RULE

Ridiculing members/non-members, or the manner in which they express themselves. This includes any complaint about the way females, males, transgendered, or any other cross-section of the membership dress, the way they express themselves (such as spelling and language skills, and any mention of religious beliefs, political preferences and affiliations, sexual preference, etc.)

Anymore put downs on women and how they dress.
How how sexy you are compared to your wife
Anymore moderation on this thread it is done.
Again

Many here want to be accepted for being themselves, wearing what they want freely .
You would think you would have the same compassion for your loved ones .

Again anymore moderation this thread is done.

[Stephanie47]

Boy, I do not want this thread to be axed, so I'll try to be careful and report "Just the Facts" as Detective Friday would say.

BK= Before Kids, my wife and I would spend many Saturdays in mid-town Manhattan sightseeing and perusing stores, including just about every lingerie section. We'd start at Bloomingdale's and work ourselves down to Macy's, Gimbel's, Saks, et al. Or we would work in the reverse direction. She was a girl from the west coast and I became her tour guide. In the early 1970's lingerie was popular, including bras, panties and slips. I think, my thoughts, there was more modesty and bedroom attire and undergarments were a way for women to express themselves in private. That was certainly the case of my wife. She had to wear dresses or skirts and blouses wherever she worked.

After kids? At home mom? Yes, there were still occasions when the lingerie came out and we played, but there were other priorities of life. Comfort ruled over playtime. Me? I've mentioned before on this forum that I do not own a single pair of women's pants/jeans. Why not? To me those are garments co-opted from a man's world. I understand why my wife, daughter and granddaughter wear such attire, and, in fact all of them have gone to thrift stores and purchased men's attire because men's attire either fit better; are less expensive; or are more functional. I have always tended to dress as a male peacock when working, and, still dress nicely as a retiree. I only look like a slob when working in the dirt.

I love colors and patterns; women's wear and men's wear. While my wife only wears pants, she is still expressive in the tops she wears. As I told my wife, "I do not know, why I do what I do." I think my mind is set to emulate a women on the extreme expression of femininity as men see women. A woman, being a woman, does not need to prove herself to any man.

My wife and I have grown old together; fifty years plus. She still makes my heart sing and I still get the twinkle of her eye. It isn't the clothes.

[CharlotteCD]

We can't explain to anyone WHY we like dressing in lingerie or dresses, but our female significant others are supposed to explain WHY they don't like wearing them?

Your wife just doesn't like them. She doesn't need a reason.

I'll respect Di's moderator comments and not give this post my full thoughts, but let's just say that you couldn't be further from the point if you tried.

Di, thanks for your post - I haven't intended this thread to be any of the things you have mentioned, and more just a conversation about how we are alike or differ from our partners.

It is, IMO, a really interesting thing considering the psychology of a human relationship. As an example:

I love stockings, tights, lingerie. I love to see my wife in it. She's not fussed, as is more "clothes off" in the bedroom. To be opposing here isn't a surprise.

I love dresses, skirts and jeggings. She also likes all of these things. This isn't a surprise.

I fancy a woman who wears all of the clothes I feel sexy in - of course I am going to find her sexy in them as well. MAYBE that is part of what attracted me to her in the first place (visually, not emotionally)??

Does anybody here have a totally different style that they like to wear, and is opposite to how their wife would dress? And is it how you'd prefer to see her dress?