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Thread: Is crossdressing the only thing you keep secret?

  1. #26
    Aspiring Member NancyJ's Avatar
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    Perhaps there is a fine line between privacy and secrecy. In an intimate relationship, a marriage, secrecy can hurt. I have told my wife my secrets (which includes my sexual fantasies). These were often difficult, but honest, conversations. No one else needs to know. To me, that is privacy. No one else in my life would want to know that I wear panties, love feminine things, and that I am in a Wife Led Marriage. The most important person in my life knows more about me than anybody. I do not keep secrets from her even though I do not get a lot of what I want. In our home, she comes first. That is how I want it to be, Nancy

  2. #27
    Senior Member kayegirl's Avatar
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    I believe that I might share the same secret handshakes and passwords as Aunt Kelly. Otherwise I have no secrets, my crossdressing is known to everybody that matters to me.

  3. #28
    Member Mary Loo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Taylor Dame View Post
    Only my crossdressing is kept secret - I'm in a DADT relationship. I am open on everything else, and don't think being secretive is a character trait. I think societal beliefs and pressures cause us to keep that secret.
    This sums it up well for me. We aren?t quite in a strict DADT, but I still try to shield her from as much as I can just so as not to upset her. If she asks, I generally tell, but otherwise no other secrets or secretive characteristics. I think she would even be more okay with it, but for societal opinions on cross dressing and how it reflects on her, not just me.

  4. #29
    Senior Member April Rose's Avatar
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    I have a number of personal issues, but my gender issue is the only one I don't share readily with most people. That seems to be loosening up a bit lately, a little bit at a time.
    I am a vessel of the goddess. Let me express my calling to a feminine life through nurturing love and relatedness.

  5. #30
    Senior Member Heather76's Avatar
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    I have no secrets whatsoever from my wife and I sincerely believe she has none that she keeps from me. With regard to spending, I keep track of our bank accounts and keep income/expense spreadsheets on my computer. Once a month I email them to her so she is always well aware of money we've spent. I don't specifically share what I spend on crossdressing as she's not interested in an itemized list. But, she can readily see what my credit card payments are. If she were to ever ask what I spent on a particular item, I wouldn't hesitate at all to tell her. I'd also tell her specifically how much of my credit card bill was related tom crossdressing if she ever asked. Anything either of us would think to spend over $100.00 for (other than normal household bills/groceries/) would be discussed with the other one beforehand because that's just how we've always been. I suspect that goes back to the early days of our marriage when our budget was tighter than a 32" belt on a 38" waist.

    Privacy and secrets we keep from other people are just that. She and I really need to know everything about one another. Family and friends don't have that need. In fact, something that has surprised over my lifetime is when I learn that others discuss their private sex life within their marriage with friends and/or family. HUH? I honestly have always believed that the intimacy my wife and I share is nobody else's business and not appropriate for the public domain. I also feel that way about our family finances. Fortunately, my wife feels the same way on these topics.
    It's never too late to enjoy a happy childhood.
    Live each day as though it's your last 'cause one day you'll be right.
    I'm finding the more feminine side of me...and I ❤️ this adventure.

  6. #31
    Learning to adapt! ConflictedWife's Avatar
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    Heather,
    I really respect your response. I am sure your wife appreciates the honesty in your relationship.

  7. #32
    Platinum Member alwayshave's Avatar
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    Charlotte, I'm not sure that my dressing is much of a secret if google and my wife know. No, I really don't hide anything from my wife.
    Please call me Jamie, I always_have crossdressed, I always will, "alwayshave".

  8. #33
    Aspiring Member KymG's Avatar
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    Yes pretty much just that, and thats been hard enough over the years.

  9. #34
    Just another 'Gurl'
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    Crossdressing not kept secret. However, the other day my wife asked me how many model train engines I had. Thankfully she was accepting of the number (99) at the time now 102.
    Just another man in a dress

  10. #35
    Silver Member darla_g's Avatar
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    As i have shared in the past i am one of the lucky ones and my wife is supportive of my crossdressing, frequently playing photographer , buying stuff for me and giving fashion advice. I do not however share details with my family, friends or neighbors. None of these people need to know so its not as much a matter of being secretive rather its none of their business. This would be the case with pretty much all the aspects of my life, my hobbies etc. I don't know if any of this is being secretive, just keeping to myself.

  11. #36
    Oh to be an English Rose Jane G's Avatar
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    That would be telling.

  12. #37
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    Oh no, I keep many secrets and quite well. In the Army long ago as a supervisor of the storage and use of classified documents, I even got paid to keep secrets well. I even have secrets upon secrets like what I did while out and about en femme a few weeks ago. None of the things that I keep secret are illegal, immoral, or dangerous, or involve women not my wife, hot cars, alcohol, smoke, or chocolate.

  13. #38
    Junior Member Charly52's Avatar
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    Luckily I?m quite good at keeping secrets probably a good job I am !!!

  14. #39
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    Tough one, wife is aware of my underdressing and is okay with it, doesn't want to partake in it but doesn't care. This is the most important part to me. The only thing else that I keep secret from her is that I love chastity, and when I can dressing up a bit. Not sure how much she would really care, but I have learned to never poke a bear or ask for more than you can stand
    Last edited by char GG; 02-07-2023 at 05:20 PM. Reason: TMI

  15. #40
    Aspiring Member jacques's Avatar
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    hello Charlotte,
    no secrets, just privacy.
    luv J

  16. #41
    Senior Member mbmeen12's Avatar
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    Rather than a character trait, I see the secretiveness as a necessity measure for self-preservation in many circumstances



    Well said!
    Escapism isn't necessarily bad, but is definitely unhealthy in the long term. While helpful in the short term, things will degrade over time. At some point, the escapee will have to face the issue. Things simply blowing over isn't really going to happen in many situations.

  17. #42
    Aspiring Member Joanne108's Avatar
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    No If there are things that I know that are confidential I maintain that. In my relationship with my wife I tell her when she asks.

  18. #43
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    The great irony in my relationship is that there are absolutely no secrets between us with this one tiny exception. 😂

  19. #44
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    Great and thought provoking question.
    Yes, I would say that the extent of my crossdressing is the only thing I don't tell my wife.
    Honesty is the best policy, in theory, just a struggle to live by that maxim...

  20. #45
    New Member Kasey101's Avatar
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    I keep it under wraps for the simple reason I am new to this within myself. So before I decide if I ever want anyone to know and come out of the closet, I just want to be in a place which I have more empowerment. So until that day I am having fun with it behind my closed doors or when I am home alone. No I am not married live with family at the moment.

  21. #46
    Silver Member Majella St Gerard's Avatar
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    I'm Batman. lol

  22. #47
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    Welcome Kasey101!

  23. #48
    Silver Member Natalie5004's Avatar
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    What I pay for HiFi equipment. As the saying goes, "I hope my wife does not sell my system for what I told her I paid for it."

    [SIZE=1]- - - Updated - - -[/SIZE]

    Quote Originally Posted by Mary Loo View Post
    This sums it up well for me. We aren?t quite in a strict DADT, but I still try to shield her from as much as I can just so as not to upset her. If she asks, I generally tell, but otherwise no other secrets or secretive characteristics. I think she would even be more okay with it, but for societal opinions on cross dressing and how it reflects on her, not just me.
    You can show your wife the Hollywood celebrity types wearing skirts and dresses. Even Brad Pitt wore a skirt out. Face it, we are trend setters here.

  24. #49
    Aspiring Member
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    One for sorrow, two for joy,
    Three for a girl, four for a boy,
    Five for silver, six for gold,
    Seven for a secret, never to be told.
    -British nursery rhyme

  25. #50
    Rachel Rachelakld's Avatar
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    I would have joined the secret service, I'm good at keeping secrets until someone asks me, then my face gives it away the answer every time. That's also why I don't play poker
    See all my photos, read many stories of my outings and my early days at
    http://rachelsauckland.blogspot.co.nz

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