I'd say MOST of us are "In the closet" as our "Hobby" is "secret" for the most part. It's just that those who are OUT are MUCH MORE likely to be POSTING as it IS their "personality type" to do so.
I'd say MOST of us are "In the closet" as our "Hobby" is "secret" for the most part. It's just that those who are OUT are MUCH MORE likely to be POSTING as it IS their "personality type" to do so.
I am not out of the closet but also have not dressed in a very long time (15+ years) before getting married. Since the urge to dress is back and stronger than ever, it sorta feels like I want to bust the closet door down!
In the closet. Ex wife knows. A couple of ex girl friends know.
These boards are my out of the closet time.
Don't know if I've already answered this question but here we go again, I'm still very much like most here still in the closet as regards to Mr CDing. Only a very few people know.
I am definitely out of the closet. I go shopping, to doctor appointments, and even go to church wearing a dress. At my church there may be a guessing game: what will John wear? Is it going to be a dress with heels, mens business casual, or a mens coat and tie outfit?
John (Legal name)
Preferred pronouns: he, his, him
In the closet mostly because my wife is not happy with my gender issues.
There's no more room left in my closet, so I'm mostly out! Seriously, though, I've been gradually integrating my wardrobe for long enough now that no one seems surprised at how I dress. I wear what fits my mood, and to some "degree", the current weather. This includes snug jeans, bodysuits, padded sports bras, leggings, and yes, at times even skirts and heels.
I'm usually in some form of hybrid attire that suits my tastes at the moment as well as the situation/task at hand, and am usually recognizable as my male self.
Whatever I wear I just own it, and have never had a negative reaction from anyone.
Last edited by Marsha Louise; 03-15-2023 at 08:30 AM.
Fashion liberated and loving it!
This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine.
This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine.
This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine.
Let it shine, let it shine, let it shine
OK to answer the closet question.
Yes and no.
Wife, her Son, Sister, sales woman at my wig shop. My usual male friends? No way.
My usual girl friends? That happen to really be my wives friends, No.
I do go out at least once a week as Natalie during the day. Shopping at the grocery store and some clothes and person items.
Am I living at Natalie full time? No. Do I want to? No. Do I wish I had larger breasts, Yes. Do I want to be a transwoman? No.
I have my fun as Natalie and at times Natalie will have dinner at home with my wife. She does not want me going out but I do when she is away. I am sneeky like that.
Last week while I was out galivanting, I came home and there was her car in front. She should have been at work. So, I did not stop and drove past and parked for about 15 minutes and drove by again. She was gone.
Last edited by Natalie5004; 05-11-2023 at 04:21 PM.
Thank you all very much, I never expected to find so much feedback and support. I am normal. Brenda
Only my wife knows and is supportive as long as it is just between the 2 of us.
Hi Brenda!
I think that most of us were in the situation that you describe, some for short times, and other for long periods. I remained mostly closeted even with my wife knowing about Maria and not being really negative toward her as long as no makeup etc. However, almost 30 years later, she shoved Maria out the door by finding a party group on Meetup that I I could attend. I started going to these monthly parties, feeling more and more comfortable as time went on, and then the pandemic hit. Since that time, while I still love and cherish my things, Maria has not dressed much (originally because everyone was home and there was no where to go since everything including school was closed) and now a year later after lock down lifted I still wonder whether I want to go back to the parties. I see pictures of others and looks like the same fabulous times like before, but Maria sort-of backstopped into the closet.... you are not an anomaly
My wife, ex wife and counselor know and that's it. My now wife is totally cool with it. I dress whenever I want around the house. She buys me stuff too. I get the same reaction from her whether I come down the stairs in shorts and flip flops or stilettos, pantyhose and a dress. Life is too freaking short, your heels shouldn't be.
If dressing makes you happy that is all that matters.
I am very much in the closet. My wife knows and is hardcore DADT. Panties are my regular everyday underwear, but I don't let her see me in them if I can help it. I have been out on occasion and went to Keystone a few years back (I really want to do that again!). My brother knows because I felt like he should know something so important about me, but he doesn't want to hear another word about it and advised me not to share it with anyone else. My oldest daughter knows, and she is very accepting, but we haven't talked about it in years. She hasn't seen me since I got a better wig! One of my other daughters knows for sure, even though it's never come up, but I know her vibe and she's DADT.
Count me "in the closet." My wife knows I like to wear women's clothing but she does not know the extent of my wardrobe. She is not appreciative of my cross dressing, but has not said "boo" about it. On occasion she has found a garment or two that I failed to sequester away. She has seen the browser open to this site. On occasion, but now it is pre-covid that I have ventured out into the world in evening hours when my wife has been out of town.
Let me deal with this comment first and then I will answer the OP's question as I see it.Originally Posted by MarinaTwelve200
Marina,
Let's see. The person posting right before me says they are in the closet and they have almost 13,700 posts.
You have almost 4,800 posts. And you say you are firmly in the closet.
There are a ton of people who say they are in the closet that post a LOT.
Please quit insulting people who do go out, which you have done at least twice in this thread. Your first post in this thread was even more insulting to those in the community.
Answering the question.
Everyone's definition of "in the closet" differs. Let's also restrict the conversation to crossdressers, as opposed to those who are transitioning, or present female a significant portion of the time.
I would say the vast majority of crossdressers would consider themselves in the closet. The numbers on this board show it. As of right now, there are 7 members and 112 guests viewing the board. That ratio is pretty consistent over time; something like 15 to 20 times the number of guests versus the numbers of members. Having been a lurker for a LONG time, I believe a large portion of that 112 are crossdressers who are afraid to even create and anonymous ID on a crossdresser board, much less being out and about in public. Of course, no one knows the real numbers, because those 112 are hiding in the shadows and don't want to be seen.
Personally, those who know are my wife, ex-girlfriends from a long time ago, and ONE person from my male life whom I've told.
However, I have made friends while being out, and those friends know both sides of me. Some have seen guy me and girl me. Others are Facebook friends who have met Dee but my Facebook page is guy me. As my friend Michelle seems to know everyone I have been introduced to a lot of people while out.
Yes, I go out regularly (like today for a couple of hours), and I post about it and write about it. Why? Because I like writing. Because I like posting pictures. I also believe there are LOTS of those 112 people in the shadows who wish they could do what I do.
I went out because I read on boards like these (and blogs) about people who were out, and I asked myself, "Why not me?" And I found acceptance and fun and made friends, and ZERO ridicule and issues. I want someone who reads my stuff to ask themself "why not me?"
So no, I don't consider myself to be "in the closet", I am probably in the minority, and my life is better because I stopped thinking about going out and actually started going out.
I'm Sun-Dee at Kandi's Land; read about my outings here:
https://www.kandis-land.com/author/dee/
I'm still in the closet, but I go out fully dressed or partly dressed occasionally. I always try to stay away from people I know and places where is a good chance of stumbling on someone I know. Only exception are "unisex" type of women's clothes I occasionally wear openly.
Definitely IN the closest. Too scared to come out.
I'm definitely in the closet to friends and family and I don't think I'll ever come out. Mentally though I've finally accepted that I'm a cross dresser and I no longer see it as some sort of weird thing, fetish or impairment. This acceptance has brought some peace in my mind.
I came out to everyone even did it on facebook. Everyone accepted and mostly said yea I knew we was waiting on you.
Flickr- https://www.flickr.com/photos/brandiedaniels/
I've been totally out since like 2015. Everyone I know knows I crossdress and has seen me dressed. I'm incredibly lucky to have such great people in my life.
I am still very much in the closet, only my ex-wife knows that I am a cross dresser.
Ex-wife knows. Some very new trans friends now know.
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