Today is my family's annual reunion. This is the third year I wasn't invited. Ever since I transitioned three years ago, they have cut me off. I'm not too bothered by it. I'm an Air Force brat and the only time I saw my aunts, uncles, and cousins were the reunions so I never got too close to them. What kinda hurts though is my parents; they were invited and they are going. I know my mom loves them and wants to see them, but I would have hoped she would have at least argued to have me attend or stand in solidarity with me and not go. I may seem a little selfish because my aunt is 84 and is in very poor health. This will most likely be her last reunion; the last time my parents will see her at a reunion. But, everyone lives within thirty minutes of each other and my parents meet the family all the time, including my sick aunt.
My oldest daughter (21) wasn't invited because she is a lesbian, but my two younger kids (18) were. Both of them said they weren't going to go. My parents offered to take them, but they were always bored when they went in the past and don't have any attachment to the 'family' at all.
Maybe soon I'll post how far my parents have come to accept me, but I am hurt by what I overheard the other day. I was invited to go over and swim with them in their pool. While we were hanging out, my mom got a phone call from my cousin 'D-Bag' and he wanted to know if I was going to be at the reunion. I heard her reiterate that 'Jason' isn't coming; and she kept using 'he' pronouns as she talked about me over there swimming. I confronted her dead-naming me and she says it is easier to say Jason and refer to me as a he when talking about me to her family and friends. She explained they get mad at her for supporting me and accepting me; calling me Lisa and using she/ her pronouns. I tried explaining how hurtful that is to me. While I am glad they accept me as Lisa and their daughter, I feel that they should stand up for me. I feel parents should support their kids and stand up for them. Even if I wasn't trans, not only would I not attend any activity my lesbian daughter was excluded from, I would cut the offenders out of my life; family or not.
I hope my parents have a good time. I don't feel like I am missing out too much. I would have liked to know what people have been up to (the family unfriended me on Facebook), but I don't want to be around a bunch of bigots anyway. I would like to think if my parents saw someone harassing me they would intervene on my behalf, but I'm not entirely sure. It is best to avoid a possible bad situation. Also the fact my daughter isn't invited is a reason not to go. I guess my point is that while I am grateful that my parents accept me, I wish they weren't embarrassed by me.
