Outed....by a tomato

[Helen_Highwater]

and some cucumber!

I'll explain but first cast your minds back if you will to a few weeks ago when I had a week home alone. One of the things I did during the time was to wash a few things that had been in the wardrobe unused for a while and needed freshening up. Rather that hang my washing out for the neighbours to see I dried them on an airer in the conservatory. All was duly put away except I overlooked a short red nightie which got left hanging over a chair.

Sat watching TV 'er in doors comes into the room. "Who's is this?!". Well nothing for it but to say mine as I was under the impression that my secret wasn't and she knew at least something of my dressing. "You wear this?", "Why?" in a less than happy voice. Now at this point I'm a little confused as she's said things that indicated as I say my secret wasn't entirely hidden so was surprised that she seemed more than a little shocked. Anyway nothing more was said.

Now guess who washed out a pair of knickers in the shower and then forgot to take them off the towel rail. Again confronted and again nothing else said.

Now back to that tomato.

Most days we have a salad for lunch and today was no exception. I'd had a couple of hours home alone that morning and having spend the time in a skirt and tee with a bralette had covered up when my good lady came home. She eats her lunch while watching TV downstairs, I retreat to my old office upstairs and sit on the PC in my skirt and top knowing that I'll hear her moving about and have time to cover up.

However......... today tomatoes and cucumber were missed off the plate and it was only when she sat down she realised the error and being the good soul she is, in what I can only describe as ninja mode, brought me my missing salad. First thing I knew of it was the office door opening and she entered, I could see the look of surprise on her face but without braking stride she duly said something like, "Here, your lunch will taste better now", put the toms and cucumber on my plate a left. And again nothing more has been said.

So now I'm having to give consideration as to how to move things forward. Instinct tells me we're a way off acceptance but also not outright rejection. So yes it's time to have the talk. It's just finding the right time and words.

[kimdl93]

Seems like you had a couple very brief conversations, but maybe just thank her for not making a big deal out of a nightie, undies or skirt.

[docrobbysherry]

We can all guess here until heck freezes over waiting "for the rite time", Helen. Or, u could just ask her?

[Crissy 107]

Helen, I have known you since I got here but did not know you were totally in the closet. Definitely time for the talk, good luck!

[susan jackson]

Proof positive that salad (and vegetables in general) are bad for you and evil!

[bridget thronton]

Hope there is a way forward for you and your wife (you seem to be trying to get caught)

[Debs]

Helen, youve been dodging this bullet for a while, talk while its fresh, dont let it fester and become a bigger problem. I think she already had an inclination, her reaction seems to be quite tame for what she has just witnessed, its time, dont waste this opportunity or you'll be dadt forever !!!! you cant undo whats been seen.

[Heather76]

My personal take on this is that you are somewhat past having :the talk." I believe you are at the point of simply saying something along the lines of "I really thought you kn ew I enjoy cross dressing. But, the look in your eyes makes me think maybe you only suspected that was the case. Regardless, I appreciate the fact you didn't make a big deal of it. If you'd ever care to talk about it, please tell me."

[Davina2833]

Helen,

As others have said she knows, Now have the talk...

Davina

[GretchenM]

Our wives often know more than we think they know. Now is the opportunity to present her with the truth regarding your needs and personal behavior and view. It may mean less freedom or it could mean a continuation without the secrecy. All sorts of possibilities, but honesty is the mission. But watch for the anger over deception and be prepared to explain that in a way that does not implicate fear of her reaction as the reason for your secrecy. That can be taken as putting the blame on her. DON'T GO THERE! Keep the blame on yourself in the form of shame and fear and all of that, but be careful that the fear factor does not come out as fear of her reaction - that says distrust of her. Those negatives add up to a greater love of yourself than for her. Don't go there either. Keep the secrecy factor on you and the common perception in our culture that men should not be women (and visa versa). That is untrue and unnatural. Some men and women can easily be the opposite - we are all different and unique when it comes to gender identity and almost anything is possible - it is the way Nature is; diversity and variation is the rule. Without that we would all still be bacteria.

[Rhonda Jean]

You've got a conservatory???

[DianeT]

When I was taught English at school, one of the first things they told us was specific to English (I mean, English English) was "understatement".
Reading your little couple adventures, and I couldn't say why exactly since it's not technically it, but I have a feeling that your wife mastered the art when she just mentioned that "your lunch should taste better now".

[mykell]

maybe time for a talk.....a bouquet of flowers at the very least.

wanted to share this :trans.jpg

[Vikky]

I am surprised your CD adventures have not attracted more attention from your wife.
Surely she should know what is going on, as it seems she knows some. Maybe time to tell more?
Vikky

[Stephanie47]

From you descriptive posts on this forum, if you think you're deceiving your wife, you're only deceiving yourself. Wives are not stupid. They observe. Your wife's and my wife's "acceptance" may be limited to "Do what your want, but don't rub it in my face!" She may interrupt the nightie and panty as an attempt to push your cross dressing on her. Perhaps you should have that discussion to gauge how she really feels about your cross dressing rather than letting unspoken words fester into more disharmony.

[rachellegsep]

very good Mykell.

[Fiona_44]

You are correct Helen, it is time to sit down and talk. As I said on another thread recently, most women know more than they let on and, based on your wife's reactions, she probably had some inkling of what was going on. It is a very difficult discussion to have but sometimes it is necessary. Wish you all the best.

[Debbie Denier]

As meticulous, thorough and precise you have been . I am amazed you haven?t been confronted before. Definitely time for the talk , choose your words carefully. I would start by telling your wife how much you love her.Take a deep breath and good luck . Hopefully you can reach some sort of compromise.

[Sandi Beech]

Wow Helen. Considering the number of recent incidents that outed you, I would think she would have discussed it if she really wanted to. It seems to me she does not want to.

If you were to bring up the subject, I think I would just start off by saying this. Does it bother you that I like women?s clothing. Then you can reassure her nothing is changing and you just did not want to rub it in her face.

On the good side, it could be much worse. My wife would be hitting me with ultimatums after a few incidents in a row like that.

Good luck with it.

Sandi

[audreyinalbany]

so twice in the last week or so you "accidentally" left out a couple of female clothing items??? I think maybe a part of you is telling yourself it's time for the talk

[alwayshave]

Hellen, I guess the question is: were you subconsciously leaving things out?

[jacques]

hello Helen,
beware - cucumbers often repeat!
luv J

[Karren H]

On the good side, it could be much worse. My wife would be hitting me with ultimatums after a few incidents in a row like that.

Mine would have either left me or kicked me out the door! Funny but yesterday morning I was walking by my desk and noticed what I thought was a pen only to discover it was an Ulta eyebrow pencil that I had used the previous night. She Who Must Be Obeyed would not have thought that was funny if she had seen it first.