Are accepting wives really rare? Survey says....

[mbmeen12]

https://www.crossdressers.com/forums...-wife-SO/page3

You posted a very similar post in 2007 and I am skeptical to what end when I see posts asking for stats and to what end and why does the individual ask??? Like all polling it is an imperfect science but makes a great college thesis paper on LGBT studies if working towards a degree. Or it's a new math fetish lol.

[Lisa Gerrie]

Julie, I appreciate the effort, it's something I would do. But some folks get concerned about an outside researcher (psychology, sexuality) joining the forum and collecting data in just that way. For some here, privacy is almost pathological.

[JulieC]

That was 2007...16 years ago. I didn't even remember that thread before I started this one. I don't even know how you found that thread. I look at my own profile and I see only as far back as 2021 on "Find latest posts". I'm very obviously not an outside researcher. I've made over 1600 posts here and have been here since 2006. If I've offended someone, I'm sorry. This was a good faith effort, and nothing more.

[Lacey New]

Personally I love seeing data like this. I know that this is a limited sample but I appreciate the effort. I would love to see a larger sample that does a deeper dive into the prevalence of cross dressing although I don?t think that one will ever get done because there is little value in it except to the cross dressing community and many men would lie and deny it if asked. However, if you read the reviews of certain brands and styles of women?s panties on retailer websites, there are a lot of them written by men.

[JennyMay]

Well, I think,I may already be included but I’m a #6. I feel so sad for those whose wives are not accepting of this aspect of their partner’s identity.

[BLACK STOCKINGS]

I would say I am a 6+ - other half loves how I look dressed - I dress almost every day after work and she loves checking out my outfit of the day.

[April Rose]

I appreciate the effort, Julie. I am too old to expect to find another relationship, but it's nice to think that the odds of finding a healthy relationship might not be as bad as I have been thinking. At any given time, my late wife could have been in category 4,5 or 6.

Di, as far as I know, my late wife joined the fab forum just long enough to introduce herself, and read Posts. She told me it was reassuring to her that the site was so welcoming, and inhabited by by reasonable people.

[Di]

Thanks April I appreciate it.
We try our best to be welcoming and have a place the GGs can say anything.

Black Stockings that’s wonderful.

JennyMay I totally agree but there are some the CDs that demands this and that …..my way or the highway. But then that has to do with the CD is a jerk not cding.
Ok
I will stop interrupting.

[Teresa.Smith.VA]

My wife is totally supportive, clearly in group #6+. Always has been.

Wife welcomes me dressing en femme around her. She actively supports me by buying fem things, shopping, dinning out, or vacationing together as "girlfriends." She encourages me to dress when she sees any hint in my mood to dress.

We are deeply in love as a strait married couple, but we also have tons of fun being girls together when the need suits me.

[JesseVF]

I?m appreciative of being in the 5 category, and totally jealous of the 6?s!

[Aka_Donna]

Initial poster-- you have been asked a couple of times, but ducked a clear answer to the question. When was the start date of your "survey". It's not really a survey, but a counting of member responses about CD experiences. A parallel counting would be of interest by the moderaters of the FAB forum. My guess is that the percentages may vary.

[mbmeen12]

JulieC I personally think it is a great question and fun and again thought provoking. When I was in the military, I did trends research. So I just went to the search bar and bam, same question....that's all. Now your next question, has the data changed based on yearly moderation trends? As to the pathology of importance of privacy responses, but that can be another survey.
Cheers��

[sometimes_miss]

As one who went through a marriage back in the 1990's, I've been clandestinely dating while cautiously asking my dates about how thy felt about transgendered peoplel ( Bruce Jenmer/ Caitlin) now for many years(. So far no positive responses. OH, I understand. Hundreds of thousands of years, of evolutiion, making women more attracted to what are traditional male positive behaviors, vs our own Trans sexual gender selveseelves, and we find that women are simply not attracted to 'feminine' quality males, or any men who they perceive to be 'less than all male, all the time', men. ' While I am not happy about that response, I understand it. We don't get to choose what turns us on, or what turns us off. So I don't blame women, for simply not choosing us as mates. But that leaves us with no option; we aren't attracted to men, and women aren't attracted to us. So there's nowhere to go.
There are so few females out there, who are willing to accept us. that there just seems that there's no hope for us. It's a difficult to life to deal with. I know, I know, that the vast majority of women, simply find us repuslive as romantic mates, but I don't know what else to do.
Just spending the rest of my life, dating, and cautiously finding out that winding up that she is absolutely NOT interested in a guy who has less than 'all manly, all the time' feelings, leaves us with not much future at all.
While most here don't consider themselves transgendered, the simple desire to adopt feminine dress, behavior, and self identity is pretty obvious a demonstration of what at least our subconscious desires are trying to tell us.

[DanielleDubois]

One thing missing in this equation TIME , I have gone through all stages over time, from fully being accepted to DADT and finally being fully accepted to the point where I can leave the house dressed and stay out overnight. .

Debs, your comment is so true. The acceptance and support of Danielle by my wife has been an evolution. Depending when I would have answered this survey over the past 40 years or even the several years I have been on this forum my answer would be very different. In the beginning it was a total secret , then DADT, then acceptance and willing to see Danielle, back to discussing Danielle stuff but not wanting to see Danielle and in the last year being able to periodically do a Danielle fashion show for my wife. And who knows for sure but the level of acceptance could change again.

[ellbee]

I was surprised too but thought it would be higher.acceptance.
But I was thinking of all our FAB through the years that joined only to sort it out and understand.
( Hundreds and hundreds) I only remember two that I all these years that left over it and two out 300 or so is good odds.

Thanks for that, Di!

And that's what I've basically concluded over the decades, that actual CD'ing in & of itself (barring extreme instances, of course)? It's not really a huge deal to many GG's, generally speaking.


However, that doesn't mean there probably aren't at least some aspects of it, that may be a bit worrisome/bothersome to a number of them, at least somewhere along the way?

Understandable with anything, really.

I suppose that may entail working thru that, on one end or another (or both!).



Anyway, as for the OP? I see nothing wrong with any of it.

I suppose, though, that one always has to take into consideration of who is providing answers -- and if there may be any personal bias *in that*, on the part of the CD'er, perhaps without even realizing it?

IOW, take *any* kind of results, no matter how "scientific" & "accurate" one may believe, with an appropriate-sized grain of salt.


Interesting stuff!


And yes, the CD'er absolutely plays a role in how the wife/SO views the CD'ing.

No, not anywhere near 100%, unfortunately. But every bit can help, I believe. It's not always easy waters to navigate, but it's a journey worth taking, IMO!

[BLUE ORCHID]

Pretty much #4, We have a very workable DA/DT,

[Gi Gondin]

Hi everyone I'm going to have to open a new category 7 although I appreciate it may have very few members, this is for men with obsessively passionate wives who have instilled crossdressing as a permanent way of life. Anyone else like to join?

I’m living between a 6 and 7 in Julie’s scale. Not a full time CD but CD is regarded as permanent and not allowed to fade out. Pink fog is always welcomed and wished for.

Thanks for adding that point Amy.

[Lacey New]

As one who went through a marriage back in the 1990's, I've been clandestinely dating while cautiously asking my dates about how thy felt about transgendered peoplel ( Bruce Jenmer/ Caitlin) now for many years(. So far no positive responses. OH, I understand. Hundreds of thousands of years, of evolutiion, making women more attracted to what are traditional male positive behaviors, vs our own Trans sexual gender selveseelves, and we find that women are simply not attracted to 'feminine' quality males, or any men who they perceive to be 'less than all male, all the time', men. ' While I am not happy about that response, I understand it. We don't get to choose what turns us on, or what turns us off. So I don't blame women, for simply not choosing us as mates. But that leaves us with no option; we aren't attracted to men, and women aren't attracted to us. So there's nowhere to go.
There are so few females out there, who are willing to accept us. that there just seems that there's no hope for us. It's a difficult to life to deal with. I know, I know, that the vast majority of women, simply find us repuslive as romantic mates, but I don't know what else to do.
Just spending the rest of my life, dating, and cautiously finding out that winding up that she is absolutely NOT interested in a guy who has less than 'all manly, all the time' feelings, leaves us with not much future at all.
While most here don't consider themselves transgendered, the simple desire to adopt feminine dress, behavior, and self identity is pretty obvious a demonstration of what at least our subconscious desires are trying to tell us.

Yep. I can relate. Whenever the topic comes up it is clear that the whole notion is repugnant to her. That?s why my cross dressing has remained a secret.

[CDMargret]

Wow this is so neat. Cat 6 for my situation. I never would have thought the numbers to be that high.

[Christie ann]

Hi, #2 here.

Julie, thanks for compiling all this stuff, I can?t imagine reading every post to glean this stuff. Interesting results!

[Jane G]

. I'm surprised by your stats being in cat 4. I thought the rest of the world was worse off. Perhaps it's better out there that us old folk thought. Which considering how fortunate I consider my own position, being born in 1961, can only be a good thing. Stuff global warming for just a moment. There is hope for crossdressers too.