A rare acknowledgement of my CD'ing from my wife

[CharlotteCD]

My wife and I have been away for a few days, and on the way home we'd been talking about Christmas presents etc, and she was talking about how out of date her makeup is. We had a long discussion about exactly what items she needs, what sort of brands she is looking for, how many for each makeup kit (work locker, gym kit, home kit!), and I started to ask for more specifics like colours for eyeshadow.

Wife: "I normally go for fairly neutral tones, light colours"
Me: "Why don't you get a work set as well then so you don't have to carry them"
Wife: "You can get smaller 3-4 colour palettes"
*Cue me laughing at her explaining for the 3rd time about eyeshadow palettes*
Me, joking: "You don't need to teach me about palette sizes"
Wife: "No, you already know plenty about makeup" with a light laugh.


That was the first time that she's explicitly/directly referenced my dressing since she accidentally opened some clothes that were delivered for me, but I had handed her with her mail in error way back in 2020.

It's really thrown me that she has actually had what feels like a bravery or acknowledgement to actually mention it. It's not something that needs to be mentioned, and it's highly unlike her to make a joke back to me about something that (at the time) bothered/bothers her so much.


It's a momentary thing, and it probably won't be brought up for another three years, but I feel somewhat reassured that my wife has actually acknowledged that side of me exists/existed, and on the weekend of our wedding anniversary as well.

I don't expect responses, just wanted to share an unusual moment.

[Diane P]

Charlotte, I'm happy for you that even as a little joke between the two of your wife has slightly acknowledged your crossdressing. I'm certain that was a major step for her to do that. Congratulations! take what little victories you can get and be happy with them.

[Tip or Ozma]

Charlotte, I treasure the times when my wife, GJ, and I engage in conversations about make-up or clothing.

[Crissy 107]

I think those of us that have less then full acceptance, most of us, take the small wins we get along the way. Myself I always hope it will build on itself but it has not at least yet. Just more wishful thinking.

[Kitty Sue]

I would consider that a positive. My wife no longer brings up my cross dressing. I don't bring it up to her either. I believe that I have entered into a DADT relationship which is fine for now and to be honest that is kind of what I am most comfortable with at the moment. Long term IDK but I attempt to just take things one day at a time.

[docrobbysherry]

U can continue with the, "probablies", and, "maybes", forever, Charlotte.

Or, u can act like a grown up and have a conversation!

[kimdl93]

Any acknowledgement without rancor is a good thing. It may be three years before it happens again, but that is so much better than bitterness or anger.

[Maria 60]

That sounded like you probably had an amazing suprised feel good smirk on your face when she said that, even if it doesn't happen all the time I'm sure it feels good when it does.
It is a great feeling when they say somethings just out of the blue and acknowledge us, sometimes my wife may be buying something on Amazon and she will ask me if I want one also, or in a mall and ask if I need a bra of pantyhose or anything like that, its really strange like you said it may not happen all the time but it does feel good when it does. Cheers and hopefully some more acknowledgements will come soon.

[DianeT]

I can understand why it means a lot to you. Acknowledgement is a level of acceptance.

[Jillcder]

Lucky you I would very much enjoy a conversation like that with my wife.

[Stephanie47]

I know what you're expressing; total silence for a long time and then maybe a one sentence or two acknowledgement. I was floored and could not react quickly when my wife said to me, "Take what you want!" when she was clearing out nightgowns that no longer fit her (sigh!) from the back of her side of the walk-in closet. In the pile was a white peignoir from 1971 that I had bought her when we were first married and I did not know squat about women's sizes.

[Heather76]

U can continue with the, "probablies", and, "maybes", forever, Charlotte.

Or, u can act like a grown up and have a conversation!

Sherry, that really isn't always a possibility. In my case, my wife is fully aware I CD. She sees it every night after dinner when I put on a dress and other garments. I sleep in the same bed with her wearing my panties, thigh highs, bra, forms, and nighties. When we get up in the morning, depending upon what's scheduled for the day, she may see me walking around en femme for several more hours. She accepts that I'm a cross dresser; BUT, she is still not particularly comfortable talking about it. When I'm dressed, we often times hug and kiss so her body is up tight against my "boobs." She doesn't flinch one bit being held close. But, on the times I've mentioned anything related to cross dressing, her responses are always short and definitely say, in essence, "I really don't care to discuss it." I don't push it as I don't care to make her uncomfortable beyond whatever level of discomfort, if any, she feels when seeimg me dressed.

[alwayshave]

Charlotte, From your post I can feel how important this was to you. I so happy for you.

[CharlotteCD]

It's been interesting to see the above responses, thanks to those who have commented.

I think that the last post above sums it up - this was important to me.

There have been numerous posts over the years on this site where the mention of crossdressing from a spouse in a DADT relationship is used in anger, to belittle, degrade or mock the CD'ing partner. The simple fact that this was brought up in a discussion that was lighthearted and not at all fractious has meant so much to me.

I'm not foolish enough to believe this is a thawing, or any kind of acceptance of crossdressing - this is simple acknowledgement, and I think that despite not dressing for some time, or feeling the need to dress even, that it is a really positive thing to not have it in my mind that my wife sits there all day hating me and hating crossdressing.

[Sabine7]

My wife acknowledged recently too. She is about to scrap her old shoes especially those with high heels. She simply told me she could have left them for me to play with. Another time when having bought a new dress, she told me I was allowed to try it because "you will like it". Joke or not, it looks like she is about to accept my feminine side.
Btw. I can't stand hearing complains about how terrible walking in high heels is! Own wife and daugther saying the same non-sense.