Feeling Entitled

[Traci H]

While I love dressing, I am pretty much of a cheapskate with my spending. I still have a certain amount of guilt with spending funds on girly items that maybe could be spent in some other way. So I shop the deals, thrift stores, and sales.

However once in a while something happens that I as a guy steps in and saves our ?family? a bunch of money. It might be a car repair or like the other day, a sewer line I had to really work at to clear, saving hundreds of dollars. There I am in my burlap men?s coarse jeans busting my hinder.

Afterwards I feel this sense of accomplishment that also says ?Hey you can reward yourself with something nice, which might mean a new top or panties or whatever. My wife hates the whole CD thing, so it?s not like I can discuss it with her or show her, but still the urge to indulge myself feels appropriate. Does this ever happen to any of you?

[Steph_CD_62]

I also have a hard time spending a bunch of money on my crossdressing items, especially since I don't wear most things outside of our house.
I am always looking for sales or looking on E-bay for less expensive items.
If I do find something that I really like, and it more than I normally would spend, I ask the wife what she thinks and MOST of the time she says if I want it just get it.

[docrobbysherry]

That sounds too complicated! I watch a game and if my team wins I get to buy something for Sherry!

I tend to decide on which my team is after they win!

[Heather76]

I spend an average of $50.00 - $75.00 each month on CD items. I don't feel at all bad about it as I only buy things on sale and at discount stores. A typical dress I buy is less than $15.00. ALL the panties I buy are less than $3.00/pair. My bras and bralettes average less than $15.00 each. My wigs are in the $60.00 range. The only 2 things I've purchased that I consider expensive are my 3 sets of forms. They average about $100.00/set. But, here's the deal. I don't drink any alcohol. I don't smoke. I don't gamble. I don't bet or go to casinos. I spend about $50.00/month on golf. I drive a 10 year old car so have no car payments. I simply don't spend much money on a day-to-day basis. This month I did spend a bit more on CD items as I purchased 7 pairs of Hanes Silk Reflections thigh highs (about $12.00 each), a lipstick, and KISS magnetic eye lashes. That's about $100.00 this month but those items will last quite a while.

And, like you, I do a lot of the maintenace and upkeep of our house myself. So, no, I don't feel at all bad about what I spend on cross dressing.

[Jillcder]

Traci, I like your way of thinking I just completed some home remodeling saving us thousands I wonder how my wife would react to that logic.

[GretchenM]

Wow, we must be clones. I feel the same way and am the same way so often. One could apply that same description to me.

In terms of why that is, based on the latest theories we bounce back and forth between kind of the classic male-like dominated identity, behaviors, and expectations and a female-like sense of self that is also fairly feminine in so many ways. Our neural nets react to the circumstances in definite ways and that produces the shifting between male-like dominated and female-like dominated. Back in the 1980's we would be considered as having an undifferentiated identity, but later on that became known as an androgynous identity which exhibits anything from more separate identities to well blended identities with behavior patterns changing as needed.

[Natalie5004]

I like Doc's Idea. How much do I spend? Who knows? Not much. Maybe a new dress per month. I only have so much space. I new one goes in, one comes out.

[Debbie Denier]

I feel the same Traci.I don?t spend anywhere near what my wife and daughter s do on clothes. That includes both drab and fem. So when I do and purchase a bargain. I feel I am worth it .

[Stephanie47]

My wife and I are financially secure. She spend money on her hobbies, and I spend money on mine. The only difference is she shows me and I do not poke the bear. Over the decades I have seen marriages destroyed by financial irresponsibly. Is there any difference between tricking out a truck or buying a new dress?

[Angela Marie]

While I was out last week I went into a Lululemon store bought a pair of leggings. Yeah they were expensive but i'm a leggings junkie. I really don't spend much on other stuff but I don't feel bad about spending on Angela.

[Traci H]

Stephanie, I?m sure my wife would rather I trick out my vehicle, less risk of her being embarrassed by her living with a CD. But it is what it is and we make it work. With that in mind, I just ordered a bra I had in my cart. 44a is hard to come by.

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Debbie, yes my wife spends way more on her hobbies and even beverages. That?s ok. I?ll shop the bargains and sales while justifying my odd purchases by my value to the household. Now to get her to be ok with a pedicure and color???.

[Maria 60]

I would spend more but like others I don't wear anything out of the house that kind of makes it a waste of money. My wife is more with if I want something why hold back and just get it. I'm the one who puts on the breaks and tells her it's a waste if it just hangs in the closet and I don't wear it out.

[Traci H]

Like I said, I?m a cheapskate at times. Kind of my justification that I?m not spending much. My wife would not agree however as I have accumulated hundreds of panties over the years. Tomorrow is senior day at Goodwill. I hope to stop and pursue the tops and jeans. If you find one that is the color of the day, it?s 50% off, then a 15% senior discount on that. Nice short sleeve rayon/spandex tees are usually $3.99. I walk out with some virtually brand new ones for less than $2. Some are actually NWT. Love the Apt 9 and Nine West ones. They are so soft. Works for me. I deserve it too after my hard work. Thanks for your input all.

[BLUE ORCHID]

I have always been lucky enough to afford what I want without taking away from the Family,

[Traci H]

Blue, the funds I spend on fem clothing are not much in reality. My wife spends more on her hobbies for sure. We are not rich, but certainly financially secure in our retirement. Have more funds now than we ever did before while raising kids for sure. Still find myself justifying my purchases to some degree no matter what. If my wife endorsed such, it would be a different matter totally I know.

[Maid_Marion]

Yes, I do the same. I'll celebrate fixing something by buying something that I may never wear outside the house.
Retail therapy is cheap compared to seeing a therapist!

Fixing stuff these days can be really cheap if you know how to shop and have the skills to do it. As well as a house full of tools!

Marion

[ReallyLauren]

I'm not a big spender but once in a while I love to get myself something. Most of my spending now is on everyday female items to build my wardrobe for my everyday activities to support the fact that I am Lauren more and more now.

[alwayshave]

Traci, I don't feel guilty spending money on makeup or dresses. CDing is really my only hobby and I don't spend money on anything else. That being said, I love thrift stores to find dresses.

[jjjjohanne]

For us, every month, we distribute cash to each of us. There is pocket money, grocery money, date money, etc. That pocket cash is money that we spend on whatever without a need to ask permission. It is discretionary spending money, I suppose. Normally, that is enough for the month for each of us. Sometimes, like when I have gotten a bonus at work, we have distributed extra pocket money to both of us. I have saved up money from my pocket money and splurged on a $100 dress, etc. before. Almost always, though, my crossdressing money flows from my discretionary pocket money. AND there have been times.... where I was personally broke for two weeks because I spent my money too quickly.

[Melody Rich]

I find it difficult too, justifying the expense which might otherwise be used.

Then again, the clothing that I buy, is clothing that I can wear everyday. While the clothing looks feminine, I do not.

I look like a man who wears some female clothing, but does so in a way that looks good without trying to pass as a woman.

[Veronica Lacey]

A male task performance bonus? Maybe you could call it a Commission for Doing Male Essentials or C.D.M.E.?

[Karren H]

Nope. I do not have any money issues when it comes to buying fem items for me or anything else. Even in retirement (semi-retirement since I keep getting calls to do more consulting though really trying to quit) Plus 5 decades of saving and good planning and a little luck! Lol.

[Traci H]

Well I haven?t had a chance to spend my commission or other rewards quite yet. Well other than that bra that arrived via Amazon the other day?.. As noted, its not about the money, I?m not jeopardizing any family finances here and have been very responsible in my purchases. Well, my wife would disagree on that front when she looked at my bin of panties. Off to the thrift store for a top or jeans!