Option to get married presenting as a woman?

[Jessica G.]

I wanted to share something my wife and I have talked about. We will get into deeper conversation when we are relaxed having a drink or a smoke.
One of these topics that my wife brought up was about getting married as Jessica.
It would not be an official wedding as we just got Married 2 years ago and I'm not going to change my name.
She said she likes the idea at some point but wanted to know if I ever had the want too.
I would love to, but at this point I don't feel the immediate need to do this but its nice to have the option.

She said we could do a small gathering of people that know (not many), she would like to get a new wedding dress then the one she used for our wedding. I would also need one too!
She has been such a supportive wife since I started to express my inner feminine self for a couple of years now and it sometime shocks me when she considers something like this on her own.

Has anyone else been able to experience getting married/remarried as there feminine self?

Jessica <3

[Alyssa87]

I really like that idea, I think its awesome that your wife is so supportive! I think its really cool!

[kimdl93]

Sadly, no but I think it sounds like a wonderful thing to share with your wife!

Here’s a great example: https://www.unordinarystyle.com/?p=1032

[Rhonda Darling]

You could probably do it as a recommitment ceremony — no legal effect, more a feel good (warm and fuzzy) moment for the benefit of the happily married couple, supported by those friends and family who are invited. Tell your wonderful wife an unconditional YES, but that the timing is everything.

I would love to do it with my wife, but being 73 and retired, and what with the economy going as it is, doing it now would be an unnecessary expense. When you do it, I know you’ll both love it and remember it for the rest of your lives.

Kind regards,
Rhonda

[Di]

We had two ceremonies both at a chapel at niagara Falls. Same chapel
We posted pictures here of our Sher& Di Wedding
The day before was our official one .
You should do it if your wife wants it.
We both wore white gowns.
My best friend ( a member here ) wore a tux and her hubby wore a gown.
Make it how you want it.

[Jessica G.]

Thank you Kim for sharing that link, looks like it was such a fun time by those photos. I would love something like that!

Rhonda that sounds like a good Idea, and like I mentioned its nothing I need at this moment but it would be something I and her want to do, a recommitment sounds like the best idea. Affordable, with people that care and I'd love to make that memory.

Wow Di, sounds like such a great experience! I think I will at some point, and I'm looking forward to it.

[docrobbysherry]

I attended a trans wedding at the Tuscany in Vegas many years ago. Both wore wedding gowns of course!

There were about 50 people there. Equally trans and straight as I recall? Lovely evening!

So, why NOT, Jessica?

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Jessica , That sounds Awesome, >Orchid**OO**

[JulieC]

I agree with some others; do it as a recommitment/renewal thing. Ok after two years is maybe a bit soon, but 5? 10? I think if you do it just to do it, it's more like a costume party than anything else.

Personally, I would love to do this. That said, only two people in my life know I crossdress. So, it'd be a small wedding (well, renewal).

[Sometimes Steffi]

A CD friend of mine got married to a GG overlooking the Potomac River. I think that they were married by "an officient" friend, so it was legal. "He" wore white, but I don't think that she did.

I also went of a relative's Lesbian wedding. They were married by "an officient" relative, so it was legal. They both wore white.

[alwayshave]

Jessica, That is great. I'd love a wedding dress.

[Genifer Teal]

Any excuse is a good excuse for a party.

[Jillcder]

Now that would be a dream come true! I would absolutely start making plans what beautiful way to commit your Crossdressing lifestyle with your incredible wife. I have had a couple dress fittings at a bridle shop and always dreamed about renewing our vows with me wearing a wedding dress. Also buy your sweet wife something special for V-day she definitely deserves it.

[Natalie5004]

Great idea. Who is going to be your bridesmaid?

[audreyinalbany]

I've never been mush into the 'wearing a wedding dress' mindset, but it'd be pretty great to be a GUEST where I could wear some of the stuff you see gg's wearing at weddings. There are precious few opportunities these days where people get all dressed up, but a wedding sure would qualify.

[Raychel]

Jessica, that sounds absoltely amazing, I would totally jump at that opportunity.
That would be such an amazing experience.

Di, Would have loved to see that, I can only imagine how fun that was and how great you both looked.

[Rhonda Jean]

This came up between my then-accepting wife and me more than once. I don't think either one of us were really serious about it. I tried on her wedding dress on our wedding night. It was years before I realized I shouldn't have done that and wished I hadn't. I've bought two Goodwill wedding dresses. I'm not one to dress to just to admire myself in the mirror, but the wedding dresses were exceptions. Kind of a heady thing to wear a wedding dress.

When brought up between my wife and me it morphed from "That'd be fun" to "You just want an excuse to wear a wedding dress" to "You really want to be a bride, don't you?". All true. Point is, to me it was never about wanting to renew our vows. Never about me re-committing to her. At best it would have been about her showing that she loved "all of me". Not that I wasn't wholly committed to her. I certainly was, but that didn't require a ceremony. It would have been entirely about me, entirely for my benefit, and really about indulging my fantasy. Kind of cheapens the vow renewal. Took me a while to catch on to that, or at least to admit it.

Too much thining? Maybe. Everybody's situation is different. Sometimes this stuff goes deeper than the surface. Don't get me wrong, the whole bride experience still creeps into my fantasies even at my age. I get it, and if you get to do it I'll be very jealous!

[ReallyLauren]

That sounds like it would be wonderful Jessica! I would love to a renewal of my marriage vows as Lauren. To me, a renewal should reflect the changes that individual's lives have gone through since the original wedding and a commitment to the each other as they have evolved. On top of this I would love to be a bride and experience everything that comes with this. While the subject has been discussed, it hasn't become serious yet but I can hope.

[Cheryl T]

Good for you.

I haven't had the opportunity but I know some who have done this. It's something I would love to do. The gown, the veil, the primping and all the ceremony. It would at the very least be a great reason to get a wedding gown.

[Jessica G.]

Thanks everyone for replying.

A recommitment idea sounds like a great way to do something like this. I told my wife about that Idea and she agrees.
She then started to talk about how she wanted to get a better dress, not that her dress was bad but it was a Torrid dress that retailed for $200. But it was fine as we had a $3500 backyard wedding that worked out great.

As far as a wedding dress I've never tried one let alone though about wearing one. I would try to find one that is by size than go and get a fitting or even find a nice used one that looks my style. No need to spend a lot of money to make it happen.

JillCDer it sure would be a great way to make that happen and create that permanent memory together. She is great and I already planned on it, she has been wanting one of Dita Von Teese's lingerie sets ever since we saw her in Vegas in November, expensive but she is worth it!

Natalie, that I don't know, our friend circle is so small now and were talking I can count them on one hand. Plus my brother, mother and cousin are the only other ones to know. Don't have to many to pick from

audreyinalbany I know what you mean, there are so many nice dresses I would like to wear but its not everyday that an appropriate event comes up to wear them. Wedding seems like the top when it comes to wearing really nice clothing.

Rhonda Jean, thank you for sharing your side. To my surprise my wife brought it up, it was something I thought would be over the top for her so it was never something that came to mind. She has told me she sees nothing wrong with it even if I ask her if she is really fine with me presenting as a woman. She said she loves me for me, not weather I am a man or a woman but for who I am. But now that it is an option I am wondering about about a bride experience. Time shall tell.

Lauren I really hope it is something that you get to do, as it sound like you would really love it. I agree with you as far as reflecting changes. I was barely dressing when we got married Oct of 2022 and a lot has changed and it would be a great way to solidify this part of me with the woman that I love and accepts me for who I am.

[JohnH]

If I ever get married again I might be dressed en femme but with my real masculine name of John. My wife passed away on 2023 April 4 and it's mighty lonely.to not have a wife anymore.

Jessica, if you truly want to wear a gown and present like a woman for your recommitment ceremony go right ahead. My suggestion however is for you to use your real masculine name.

John

[Kitty Sue]

Sounds like fun.

[JulieC]

As far as a wedding dress I've never tried one let alone though about wearing one. I would try to find one that is by size than go and get a fitting or even find a nice used one that looks my style. No need to spend a lot of money to make it happen...

...there are so many nice dresses I would like to wear but its not everyday that an appropriate event comes up to wear them. Wedding seems like the top when it comes to wearing really nice clothing.

Jessica, I can understand the idea to be frugal when it comes to this. But, the reality is this is likely a once in a lifetime event. For a husband-to-be, you just rent a tux and be done with it. For a bride, it's an entirely different experience. I would go the whole nine yards. Not that you spend 10s of thousands of dollars, but you don't want to regret not having the dress you really wanted, or the accoutrements, or the heels, or the hair, or the jewelry. Yeah sure, you could go to Goodwill a few times and maybe find a decent enough dress. But, where's the fun in that?

Do this right. Peruse online catalogues. Get an idea of the type or types of wedding dresses that really get to you. Go to a bridal salon. Get measured. Talk with the consultant about what you like, bring pictures to show them. Then you can try on those general styles in store and see if they really do work, and how you respond to those styles.

[patti.jean]

Jessica,
I hope you are able to have your wedding and wish the brides all the best.

Katherine and I had two weddings the first was a traditional wedding and at the second wedding we both wore wedding dresses. The second wedding was at the The Dunes Resort in Saugatuck during a TG Weekend event. It was several years ago and is a precious memory.

FL000011.jpg

This is a photo of the dress I wore.

[Jessica G.]

John, I'm sorry to hear about your wife. In regards to the name since it's nothing that's official I would like to hear my name that matches.

JulieC after reading what you wrote, you do make some very good points. I guess I just never thought about some of those aspects. I think it's because I have not put to much thought into this as it's just been am idea we would probably like to do but who knows when. I may change my mind and decide to go all out within reason. You opened my eyes to thinking about other aspects of the wedding experience.
Patti that sounds like it was a wonderful experience. You must of felt beautiful! That is such a nice dress. I'm happy you got to experience it. Thanks for sharing