I was out shopping in Manchester and to my horror a person who I had worked with for 10 years was coming towards me on the same footpath, so I thought nothing I could do, so just walked past him and we was shoulder to shoulder as we passed each other, and he didnt even give me a glance.
Betty, I prefer it both ways: Go out a lot but never where anyone knows u!
First, I don't dress to vanilla venues for mundane tasks. As a CD I don't have any desire to.
Second, I go out a lot dressed to T friendly clubs, bars, etc. But, not near where I live!
Lastly, I attend many out of town T events and conventions in other cities like Vegas! Where the chance of running into someone I know is less than one in a million!
U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.
Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!
If one is not ready to be recognized, one is not ready to go out, at least not in locale where the chance of such an encounter is significantly above zero. I know that, for some crossdressers at least, that risk is a big part of the thrill, but you should be doing an honest risk assessment (likelihood and impact) when contemplating venturing out.
Calling bigotry an "opinion" is like calling arsenic a "flavor".
Aunt Kelly's point is a good one...Likelihood AND Impact! This is a major reason why I don't go out any kind of dressed anywhere near home. Even so, with a small likelihood but huge impact, the risk can still be great. 1 x 10 or 10 x 1, (likelihood and impact) it's still 10.
I once tried on some sandals in an outdoor store as Christie. A few weeks later I was in the same store as a guy and one of the SA’s asked if I had bought those sandals. And, I have also been close to people who know the male me and didn’t show any recognition when I walked past as Christie. I guess some people are paid to pay attention.
Exactly my situation. My car is 1 of 2 cars built in the color/trim/engine/etc. I've never seen another one like it and know if any of my friends saw it, they would assume I'm behind the wheel. I've been very cautious about where I go in it en femme.Originally Posted by Stephanie47
It's never too late to enjoy a happy childhood.
Live each day as though it's your last 'cause one day you'll be right.
I'm finding the more feminine side of me...and I ❤️ this adventure.
I've had three accidental outings so far:
1. My wife and I were having drinks at a favorite bar, and noticed a friend at a booth near ours. I had already walked past the booth to go to the restroom. My wife decided to go talk to her, and I decided "what the heck" and went over, too. I said to the friend "well now you know something new about me!". She said "are you wearing a skirt?" I said "yes!". Nothing else was said about crossdressing. I sat down and joined them. It turned out that she was there with a daughter of an acquaintance, and another young woman. We just had a normal conversation, some nice catching up, etc.
2. A GG friend and I had a "girl's day out", including shopping lunch, and on a whim, our local art museum. We're having a great time, and I walk around the corner and who do I see but one of my closest male friends, who I was not out to, and his girl friend, who I had met a few times. I saw him before he saw me, so I beat a hasty retreat into a different gallery. Again, I said "what the heck", as I had been wanting to come out to him anyway, and went back to where they were. (BTW, my GG friend was super -- she had said "HELLO, [FRIEND]" loudly so I would hear to to let me know when she first saw them). He said "you look different", with a laugh, and that was it. His girlfriend, who has since become good friends with my wife and me, just gave me a big hug and said I looked great. Again, we didn't mention crossdressing after that.
3. The same day as #2, I went to fair trade store (similar to Ten Thousand Villages) where I am out to the employees, and sometimes volunteer (not in Joanie mode). A good friend of my wife's, who I know slightly, was there. She was very positive as well.
So I am apparently very recognizable in Joanie mode, but have only had positive experiences when accidentally outed.
I have walked past several people I know while dressed and nobody recognised me. They probably didn't even acknowledge my existence as you walk past strangers all the time.
With makeup, a wig and feminine style glasses, I don't think I am that recognisable.
On the other hand, I was heading into public transportation in male mode. A group of 3 T girls that I know, also in male mode, recognized me and called out to me.
Another time I was in male mode talking with a group of people, including 1 T girl en femme. She didn't recognize me until I introduced myself to her using my girl name.
Hi, I'm Steffi and I'm a crossdresser... And I accept and celebrate both sides of me. Or, maybe I'm gender fluid.
Betty, I can remember the first time I crossed paths with someone who I knew from male mode. I was scared to death. I still get a little nervous when I'm around people I know. what really gets me nervous is when they come up to me and start talking to me. Thats when it really gets nerve racking. But so far no one has recognized me but I still don't push it and won't go to certain places that I am sure that I would run into friends... take care and try not to show your anxiety.
" I have to tell you, sweetheart, my breasts are as smooth and beautiful as the day that I bought them " Lola from Kinky Boots
I've only had it happen twice once I was leaving my street and my neighbor asked who was that girl I saw driving your car My response was "not me I don't know must have been a car like mine" leaving my all alley Not likely anyway that's as far as it went The next time I saw a friend in the mall I just made a bee line out of there. Lucky so far I did see a friend once in a gay bar that did drag shows I was not dressed He admitted that he was gay and I admitted that I was a cross dresser. We both had a good laugh
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]Sallee
It definitely is a small world. When I dress I just see me in a dress but a few years back I was a little surprised. On Halloween we dressed up and went house hopping and of course I was dressed as a sexy witch. I was sitting at my in-laws close friends house that we would associate with often. About half hour later the husband asked my wife where I was, my wife laughed and told him I was right there. He starred at my for a few minutes and was he was in disbelief that was me, he said he was going to ask my mother in-law who the women was. I guess we look better then we think but I believe as hard as it could be but if in that situation and we don't make any alarming movement to draw the attention from that person.
I guess we look better then we think.
I have four stories, but only two turned out to be what they seemed to be.
1) Once I went grocery shopping across town while dressed pretty. I was a man in a skirt. (That's all I ever do.) While leaving the store, I heard someone say, "Hey Joey!" I was mortified. I kept walking. She called to me again. I decided that there was no point pretending I wasn't me. I turned around. It turned out to be the owner of a restaurant that I frequent. Sometimes I go there while dressed pretty. She and her husband talked to me briefly at the entrance to the grocery store.
2) I was at the airport waiting for baggage. I was dressed pretty. Someone calls my name. I did not turn around. They kept calling. Eventually they said, "Joey! Turn around!" I finally looked their way. It wasn't someone that I knew. That other Joey didn't want to see them either.
3) I wore a dress and heels to a pharmacy rather close to where I grew up. It was late. I had talked to the employee there about my crossdressing at one point. This time, I decided to show up there dressed pretty and say hi to her. She loved my outfit and was kind and friendly. Then, as I was leaving, I opened the exit door and encountered my brother's best friend. He knows me. He was three meters away. He said "Hey!" and maintained eye contact. He never acted like he noticed anything unusual. There's no way that he didn't notice my outfit. I mean, I guess he could have not noticed -- but not reasonably. My brother is the primary person that I know that I would NOT want to know about my crossdressing. Later, I saw the guy while we were at a restaurant. I went over and spoke to him and his wife. No sign of any change in their behavior. I have never mentioned it to him. I am sure my brother would say something if he knew.
4) I went out to eat with an aunt who did not know that I crossdress. I didn't tell her. I just showed up in a knee-length skirt, black top with a white button-up shirt that was open, and flats. She saw me come in. She stood up and hugged me. We sat and talked and ate. At the end, I figured I needed to tell her not to mention my outfit to anyone. I asked her, "Did you notice my outfit?" She said no. I told her. Then we left the restaurant and when shopping. She wanted to buy me a dress that I tried on. I didn't think that I would wear it, so we didn't get it.
I am a man who presents male and wears feminine clothes.
I blog about my outings: https://joeypress.wordpress.com/
Regarding hiding in plain sight. I cannot find my socks in my sock draw. I ask my wife, "Where are my socks?" She walks over and picks them right out. Most people can and do hide in plain sight.
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