Hobby or life style? Crossdressing is what to you?

[bridget thronton]

It is part of who I am - I like wearing dresses and heels and likely will do just that every day when I retire in 3 years

[mbmeen12]

How do you view crossdressing in your life?

It is a means of mental and physical expression.

[alwayshave]

Given my current time restraints it is a hobby. Someday, I hope to make it a lifestyle.

[GretchenM]

Great question, Di.

For me it is no hobby. It is a part of an adaptation to living with an undifferentiated gender identity. Since I was able to sense an identity probably at 2 or 3 years old my identity has been variable and fairly ambiguous, sometimes more male-like, sometimes neutral, and sometimes more female-like. The adaptive variability is driven, in part, by the prevailing requirements of the social environment I am currently in. If, for example, I am with a woman or more women than men I will shift to the more female-like mode if I deem it appropriate to most completely connect with others. But in other situations I will be more male-like or neutral.

I find the female-like mode the most comfortable in an all around identity, but blended in to that are distinctive male-like behaviors that are of less importance but fully available if needed. In some thinking this is the essence of psychological androgeny. It is also fully consistent with the modern Gender Mosaic theory of gender differentiation.

In my normal expression I tend to blend with mild male-like dress and mild female-like dress - hints of each but nothing purely one way or the other. Some find it confusing but then they are operating in a more either/or mode of thinking and expectation which is fine. But I try hard to not exhibit an in your face definite identity expression as many with more differentiated identities are more prone to do. I am always expressing in the middle ground in public.

But in private it is either that or deeper into the female-like expression from head to toe. I enjoy those times immensely, but I personally feel it is inappropriate for me to engage in that publicly as it does not reflect my social identity which is a mild mixture of female and male dress in a way that is not intrusive but adaptable to the many different situations we encounter as we move through the social world. Which is also characteristic of a mildly androgynous undifferentiated identity. Thus that is a lifestyle.

[Kris Burton]

For me it's an equal balance of both qualities. It is not something I do 24/7 but rather when the opportunity arises. I find it fun and artistic as well - more hobby-like in that regard. I also find it takes up a large part of my consciousness. It is always on my mind, and seems to fulfill a deep need in my psyche. I believe I am a much more well-adjusted and happy individual since I began to actively CD. At this point I would not wish to stop. As such it has taken on lifestyle qualities as well.

[Maria 60]

I would be safe to say it started off very sexual and soon after it became just read or watch tv dressed just felt so relaxing. When my children unexpectedly went to school out of town my wife was so worried that things were going to excell at a fast rate and we were going to live with locked doors and window shades closed. But for some reason the opposite happened, while my children were living at home when opportunity hit I had to go all out because I didn't know when my next chance would come.again. Instead I wasn't fully dressing I was mostly doing my dressing when I would settle for the day and just enjoyed wearing a nightly or full slip reading of watching a movie, almost like my relax and slow down time. I still did dress full out but not having anyone home it was more of when I wanted to instead of when I had to, so it became normal and new experience to do house chores dressed and just at a different pace. To me I would call it a little of a habit because I can't fully control it and also a hobby because I do it in my spare time and do add to it. My wife more surprised then anyone thinking when the children left it was going to be a full evolvement, instead I dressed less and wasn't as frustrated trying to find time. It just seems like it goes through different phases that I guess always keeps it fresh and exciting.

[MarinaTwelve200]

Definitely a HOBBY, with a few side benefits. About twice a month for a few hours, creating and collecting "looks" and enjoying the Relaxation, Detachment, stress relief, not to mention the pleasure of feeling pretty and the erotic feelings. PERSONALLY, I feel with the 24/7 folks it's something more AKIN to transsexualism or at least an "unhealthy obsession". But, then again, it's only my uninformed opinion. L&LL.

[SaraLin]

Well Di, my (semi)joking response would be "I crossdress because the world expects me to look like a man."

In all seriousness, I dress as feminine as "house rules" allow because it helps keep the dysphoria at arm's length and still maintain a <somewhat?> normal life.
If I had to completely stop, I honestly believe I'd slowly have a meltdown.

So - it's more than a hobby and surely less than a lifestyle. It's just my way of balancing my life.

[Crissy 107]

I do not consider this a hobby but due to a DADT relationship it is not a lifestyle either. Yes of course I would like to do more but I cannot, at least not at this time.
I am always hopeful but I may be The King of Wishful Thinking

[ReallyLauren]

It started as a deep seeded hobby many years ago when I dressed occasionally but it's more of a lifestyle now. Right now, I'm dressing multiple times per week and doing my normal activities (recreation, shopping, etc) as my authentic self. I'm Lauren and I want to dress, act and live as a woman as much as I can.

[chrissy111]

Now that I'm full-time I guess it has become a life style. But as I look back I really believe it's also been a hobby that I have lived with since I met my girlfriend/wife.

[suddenly_CD]

I don't consider it either for me. It's more 'therapy' than anything. It keeps me calm and centred as I am a bit impatient and can easily see the bad in any situation. Being dressed puts a different outlook on life (no idea why but I'm not complaining). I'm lucky that I work from home, have no obligation to put my camera on for meetings and have a fully accepting wife. So, I have dressed every day this week (and I do most weeks if I need to) - looking to change into something a bit more 'party' for Friday evening's end of week booze up with the wife later :-). I'm a bit more conservatively dressed for work at the moment and this is what helps keep the stress of long work days in a difficult job, in check.

[Rhonda Jean]

I think as a group we're really good at parsing words, and that includes me. I have alternately described it as a hobby and a lifestyle/identity depending on who I was talking to and the impression I wanted to leave. For many years it was simply my identity. I couched it as a hobby when it seemed more palatable to do so. When I'd find a few hours here and there or go off for a couple of days to do my girl thing, hobby would seem an adequate throw-away description. I wasn't fooling anybody.

[CarlaWestin]

I don't know. I view it as just a very satisfying pleasurable experience. It's a special color in the usual day to day box of crayons.
Maybe it is just playing dress up. But, it's my form of entertainment and sometimes adventure.

[AllieBellema]

It's a hobby to me. It's something I've been interested in doing when I was younger and, even though I have days where I feel genderfluid, I never planned on making this part of my lifestyle. It also helps that most of my dresses are victorian so I can't blend in with todays females anyway, unless I went to some southern reanactment. Granted, it's been a fun hobby for me. It's a lot to put on but I love the results once I got everything on and see myself in the mirror!

[JulieC]

"Hobby" - a pursuit outside one's regular occupation engaged in especially for relaxation
"Lifestyle" - the typical way of life of an individual
"Identity" - the distinguishing character or personality of an individual

Crossdressing is an expression of my identity. Crossdressing is a need for me. The longer I don't crossdress, the more negative impact there is. So, to me CDing is me being me. It's not a hobby in any respect. To me, a hobby is something one gets interested in and later potentially loses interest in it and moves onto something else. I can't do that with crossdressing. Is it a lifestyle? How often I get to dress is a function of my lifestyle. I might make choices that support crossdressing and that might be considered a lifestyle. For the last month+, I've been able to crossdress full time at home (and have). I've been undressed more than half the time outside of the house. I guess you could say that's a lifestyle. Really though, it's a time in my life I've been waiting for for a long, long, long time. I'm now finding myself transforming inside, as the femme aspects of me are finally integrating into the whole me.

[Karren H]

I think to me it’s more of a sport! You train and practice and perform! Needs to be both an amature and professional crossdressing league!

[Cheryl T]

Certainly not a hobby.
Restoring cars, woodworking, snowmobiling, amateur sports are hobbies.
I don't know that I can call it a lifestyle as that's a shady area to me. This is and always has been a part of me. I believe it to be genetic the same as my eye color, being right or left handed, my hair color, height and so on.
It's just me, who I am, who I love to be.

[DAVIDA]

Well, for me, it's neither one.
It is and always was, me.
I have been this way for as long as I can remember.
I didn't ask to be a CD, nor would I want to be one if there had been a choice.
My entire life I thought I was an abomination.
Do I feel this way now? No.
Jean was the first person I ever told about it, because I didn't think I could marry her with ought letting her decide for herself if she was willing to go along this road or not.
To my surprise and absolute joy, it wasn't even an issue.
She is the one who helped me realize I wasn't some kind of freak.
She told me that if I wasn't the way I am, I probably wouldn't be the person she fell in love with.
I do know too, that I could stop dressing in anything feminine, but it wouldn't change who I am, a crossdresser.
I have been out and about in Atlanta several times, and she was always with me.
I have met people from this forum, even drove to Savannah dressed alone to meet up with a former member and we walked around the city.
This is all behind me and I have no need or want, to ever go out again.
I guess all this rambling is to say I am just ....ME.

[Teresa.Smith.VA]

I too would not call my need to CD a hobby or life style. However, occasional CDing is an essential need that brings me great joy.

I revealed my need to CD soon after I met my wife. We have both enjoyed pretending that we are girlfriends who enjoy each other's company, at home and in public. Sharing my need to CD has clearly brought us closer together.

[lmildcd]

I don't know if I consider cross-dressing a hobby. I like wearing women's clothes from time to time since it makes me feel better. It is not a lifestyle for me. I may wear leggings and shirts that could pass for regular sweat clothes when I go to the store. Sometimes I wear pantyhose, stockings, or knee highs underneath regular clothes when I go out. I only wear dresses and skirts in my own home.

[Di]

Thank you everyone for telling your truth.
I think it helps new GGs seeing how it is different for everyone.
I think when they look for answers they read something and mistakenly think every CD is the same .
I love reading what crossdressing is to you .
We have the BEST members!
I like getting to know you.

[Misty_cder]

When I first started dressing, I have to say it was a hobby because it was a fetish for me. Now some 30 years later, it has become a lifestyle. I do not get to dress 24 / 7 like some ladies do, but my underdressing and the time I do get to dress are just a part of me.

[Stephanie47]

I dislike trying to assign a single word to a complex issue. Tomorrow I am headed to the Museum of Flight in Tukwila, WA for the annual Northwest Scale Modelers show. That's a hobby of mine; Building military plastic models. I do not consider that activity to be part of my sexual identity or genetic makeup, etc. wearing women's attire something I need to do to maintain some sort of inner balance in my life. Depending upon external stimuli my inner self reacts differently. Given the overt hostility there has existed towards men who emulate a woman, I do not know why I or any other man would voluntarily engage in cross-dressing.

It is possible to have a hobby within this activity. I do collect/amass as many colors as possible of my favorite Vanity Fair panties. I have no intentions of wearing them unless I acquire more than one of a color. I see that as no different than collecting postage stamps.

[Andrea Renea]

Given the two options I`d say is a hobby. Just something fun that I do.

I go out multiple times a week. Grocery shopping, shopping at Burlington, TJ Maxx, gas station etc...

I don`t dress all day. Maybe until noon then I`m back in male mode in the afternoon.

I`ve aiways been treated well and with repect.