Anyone transgender been able to rein it into just crossdressing?

[Samantha51]

After writing the above, I read some more of your writings and now I want to talk about a bit more.
Your list of reasons for thinking you might be trans are troubling to me, so let's look at them.

1. Euphoria when I see myself dressed (not always)
Look closely at this. Why euphoria? Why not a "finally, this is what's right" sense of relief? Be sure it's not just about "the look" - which could be CD.
Euphoria is the right word. I wasn't expecting the visceral, immediate sense of "rightness" when I saw myself. First time I ever felt that way. Electric. So I do consider this gender euphoria. I then googled to name this new sensation which led me to where I am now - this was key to me. It was more than just thinking I looked ok because I didn't - hairy body, no makeup or wig

2. A quiet voice saying "you're a woman" when I stripped away all the female clothing, mannerisms and behaviours and asked myself "why".
Now, this one I can't and won't argue against. An inner knowing is just that - a knowing. Just be sure it's your voice in your head, not someone elses.

3. I enjoy the comfort of wearing a bra - most days - it's like a hug. That could just be lack of mothering.
Sorry, but this sounds more CD than T*.
There's an old joke that goes "a CD can't wait to get home and put on her bra. A Trans woman can't wait to get home and take off her bra."
It's the hug that it gives mem but that's not CD or TG. My wife dislikes bras so I understand what you're saying

4. I am enjoying wearing a blouse in private. OK, just CD.
You said it this time, not me.

5. A yearning to start HRT.
OK - but why? What do you expect to get from it? Have you weighed the pros AND the cons? This is where the counsellors come into play and I'll bow out and not say anything more
Why? To know peace (hopefully). I'd start it as a limited time trial of one to three months. If I feel nothing (or worse) then I'll know I'm NOT transgender but if I feel better as many many trans people do then it will give me so much confidence. It'd be a trial for the mental improvements not for physical changes

6. I like feeling my boobs (just pecs and fat!) through my bra - there's a surge of relaxation and calm. I know cis women don't go fondling themselves!
Again - this sounds more like CD than trans. Bras are (to women) primarily a "necessary evil" and not a big deal.
Again, I know women don't love bras, but it's not the knowledge or feel of the bra (I actually prefer the feel of a plain cotton bra) it's a similar electricity I feel when seeing myself dressed sometimes - the gender euphoria is the best I can describe it

7. Other things like loving women's clothes, wanting to look like women, wanting to walk down the street arm in arm with other women, wanting to be in women's company, disliking toxic men.
About the only trans indication in this list it the phrase "other women", but even here it seems like it's based on a skewed vision of what women really do. I've only seen women walking arm in arm in commercials (or if they're intoxicated).
Here in the UK it used to be common for women to hold hands and walk arm in arm. I admit it is (sadly IMO) less frequent nowadays.

I'd suggest that you step back, take a deep breath, and examine what you really need to do.
There is no blood test or brain scan or genetic test so everything relies upon my own sense of self, and that is warped by a lifetime of normal living, trying to get on. Knowing myself is hard and is why I've not jumped further yet.

I'm not keeping score, but I'd call that the majority indicative of TG. But it's the very doubt about "is this enough" and what I have to lose that is holding me back.

Thank you for your reply x

[OrdinaryAverageGuy]

I'm not trans, so maybe I don't know what I'm talking about. But I suspect that if you can only cd, not transition, and be perfectly happy, then maybe you're only a cd and not trans. If that's not enough, maybe you're trans.

[docrobbysherry]

I got nothing, Sam! But then, I do everything backwards or the hard way!

When I suddenly began dressing in my 50's, and for the next 10+ years I thot I wanted real boobs and to become a woman.

Then, I found this site. Which quickly helped me realize I wanted to appear to be a woman, not actually become one!

I've been a happy CD for the last 15 years!

[Kitty Sue]

Do you have any transgender support groups in your area. I used to attend one not far from where I live. The members were wonderful! However, I stopped attending meetings as I realized I was not transgender but just a crosssresser/transvestite.

[Samantha51]

Yes, I've attended one a few times and will go again (and change there) when I buy an outfit. There's another group that meets in a cafe that I want to try. This well be a litmus test. Thanks x

[Christie ann]

Samantha, I am definitely trans. I have known since I was pretty young, but back then you learned quickly to hide all that stuff. As is a common story, the advent of the internet and the increase in the transgender population gave me the vocabulary for what I already knew. But now I am married and have kids and grand kids. If I were 20 right now, I would transition without hesitation. But I am not. I love my wife too much to make her go through the pain of a transitioning husband. As so many GG’s on this site will tell you, she didn’t sign up for that. However, I didn’t sign up for it either. Nonetheless, I have needed to look at other avenues to take care of the gender dysphoria that rears its ugly head more and more often.

I have had the chance to spend days at a time at Christine ( with even longer times between) these memories help so much. I spend too much on clothes that I will never be able to wear out. I try and do things that are physically demanding and mentally challenging to keep the monsters at bay. Oh, and I live vicariously though the members here.

I don’t know what you are facing but I imagine you know in your deepest being if you are trans or not. The big question is what are you going to do about it. When you have other people in the equation you have to carefully weigh just how much you have to be a woman and how much you can get by. Sandi’s dad made a good comment. Sometimes you only get half of the loaf.

Good luck, think hard we are all pulling for you.

[Genifer Teal]

I don't hate being a man or hate my male parts. I don't feel dysphoria. For me it's a positive desire to be a woman. Odd to say the least. It's called gender incongruence for me, not dysphoria. I dislike my body hair, etc but that's no biggie.

I did some searching. everything official pretty much correlates dysphoria and incongruence as the same. they speak of them pretty much in the same way. Even in the same sentence interchangeably. I didn't go to any outside discussion of it other than medical. Just saying it doesn't seem to be Much more than a rewording of gender identity disorder.

[Jane G]

We are all so different, but the basic instincts and need never go away. Life brings what it brings. An ever changing cacophony of decisions and choices. In my formative years I had such a desire to be a woman. I was out to close family, I took hormones. But it was never supported or tolerated, by those I was close to. My farther actively discouraged me. You can imagine how, in those days. (Love you dad.) My mother was a business woman. I cried at my fathers funeral, but not my mothers. I Joined the Royal Navy and Married the love of my life, who I had met at school. I never told her I crossed dressed, she found out the hard way. We are still in love after 45 years together and she prefers that I present to the world as male. It's a small compromise for what I get back. If we had not fallen for each other, who knows how I would present to the world, in these modern times. I know I am transgender. The internet keeps affirming such. But honestly, there is more to life, it is simply one part.