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Thread: Interactions IRL

  1. #1
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    Interactions IRL

    My experience so far has been that people are much kinder interacting face to face than on tiny screens. To those who venture outside enfemme, it would be so nice to hear of the best, worst, kindest, friendliest or rudest things people have said to you. Here are some quotes from my most recent adventure:

    Older woman walking behind me at the airport: "I am looking at your bag (tote) trying to read the brand name because I need a new one and yours is really nice!"

    A college student at the museum shop while browsing in the same aisle for five minutes before returning to her group of fellow students : "I really love your hat, it goes well with your dress."

    A woman trying to get a perfect selfie shot when I offered to take her photo seeing her struggle after taking probably the 50th selfie: "Thanks hun! You look so nice, you look like a model."

    Starbucks' cashier while placing order after a morning run in an athletic mini dress paired with sneakers and a bucket hat: "You look so wonderful, everything is coming together perfectly (making a heart sign with hands)."

    Food truck guy when the order was ready: "Here's your order, senorita!". "Gracias! Muy buena!" I replied.

    A woman at the sidewalk who I politely asked if she would take a picture of me: "Absolutely, I am going to take a few from different angles and distances and you can keep changing poses." She took about thirty in two minutes.

    A young couple who I asked if they could take a picture of me while waiting for the walk sign. The guy while the girl took the photos "You're in luck, she goes to film school." "Yay!", I said with a big smile and bigger thanks.

    A drunk guy coming out of the underground metro station downtown where I was getting a few photos taken by a kind woman late at night as bus friend pulled him away (he could barely walk): "You (the woman taking the photos) know she (me) is a _______"(few times). No one could understand what he was saying. He was loud but very drunk. Neither the woman nor I paid any attention and his friend pulled him away.

    The woman I set next to at a bar and talked for a few minutes when I was leaving: "Are you on Instagram?" (as she opened the app on her phone). We talked a bit more and ended up exchanging phone numbers.

    A group of four young people (two couples likely), all the way from Kentucky to Ontario, after talking to them for a bit, taking their photos and asking if they could take mine. One of the girls who I handed my phone to: "Aaaw, you want me to take your photos? (Holding the phone close to her heart) Absolutely!" As I took off my rain jacket (it was raining a little) and set the bag and the jacket in a corner and she prepared to take the photos, the other girl a standing a few steps behind her: "OMG! That girl (me)! I am going to picture her too!" One of the guys was really sweet and gentlemanly. We parted with hugs.

    The guy at the hotel reception, "Would that be all Ms. Last name?" The girl at the same desk next morning: "I hope you have a good day Ms. last name after attending to my request."

  2. #2
    New "old" girl Suzie Petersen's Avatar
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    Awesome post Prazia, sure sounds like had a great experience all around!
    Good for you and thanks for sharing some uplifting thoughts and comments.

  3. #3
    Aspiring Member Bea_'s Avatar
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    I posted about it a while back but I wore my pearls (in drab mode) to a local coffee shop and the young male barista told me "I love the pearls! You're really rocking them." My confidence skyrocketed for that day.
    To be loved but not known is comforting but superficial. To be known and not loved is our greatest fear. But to be fully known and truly loved is, well, a lot like being loved by God. It is what we need more than anything. ~ Timothy Keller

  4. #4
    Platinum Member kimdl93's Avatar
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    Those were really lovely statements (well, excluding the indecipherable drunk guy).

    It got me thinking back to IRL statements. A few have stayed with me over the years. My step daughter said “You’re beautiful” the first time she met me en femme. The first time I met a close personal GG friend she said “you have a Meryl Streep thing going on” and later observed “you’re just the same person as ever, except with much nicer clothes!” And after being drawn into a bachelorette party, I thanked the girl who invited me for being so welcoming and accepting. She insisted that she had no idea I was a transwoman and said “I I just assumed you were an attractive mature woman.”

    I hold onto those comments at times when I don’t feel great about myself.
    Last edited by kimdl93; 05-02-2024 at 03:21 PM.
    Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one.

    Eleanor Roosevelt

  5. #5
    New "old" girl Suzie Petersen's Avatar
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    Awesome comments Kim! And I absolutely agree that you do have a Meryl Streep thing going on! And the comment from your step daughter is just priceless!

    One comment I received that comes to mind was one time I got up from the table where I had just finished lunch with 3 other T-girls, downtown Atlanta. I was wearing flared stone washed jeans that had cuts and patches all over. Nice butt and hip padding so lots of curves, crop top with bare midriff, 4" ankle boots, Big hair and hoop earrings, and of course my sunglasses and a cute purse. I was like 155 lbs, 5'11", and very tan that summer. I felt good and thought I looked great!
    As I am walking out of the restaurant, this guy gets up and walks next to me and says "So, what kind of work do you do?" LOL

    My wife once said to me "You do this so well. You are better at makeup than most women I know!". It was a very nice compliment for sure, but I could barely hear it over the sound of the alarm bells going off inside her head.

    And then there was the guy hanging around on a sidewalk late one evening where I was the last one of us to get into a minivan as we were leaving for somewhere. He sneaks up behind me and reaches up under my short leather skirt to touch my thigh!
    I swung around, screaming "What are you doing, Creep!" at him, and he just gasped "But you are so pretty!" a split second before my purse hit him in the face. I take that as a compliment
    Last edited by Suzie Petersen; 05-02-2024 at 10:47 PM. Reason: Adding a few more details to the story.

  6. #6
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    I sometimes get compliments on my Triple pierced Earings
    Having my ears triple pierced is AWESOME, ~~......

    I can explain it to you, But I can't comprehend it for you !

    If at first you don't succeed, Then Skydiving isn't for you.

    Be careful what you wish for, Once you ring a bell , you just can't Un-Ring it !! !!

  7. #7
    Silver Member Sandi Beech's Avatar
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    I have had similar interactions IRL.
    Without a doubt, I am treated much better when I am en femme. I am not going to try to recall all the conversations since I have a lot of started threads if anyone wants to read a lot : )

    The thing is, I like going to bars and clubs because people are generally there to socialize for a while. It is lovely to receive comments from people in passing, but those kinds of interactions tend to be brief. I really enjoy spending an evening out meeting new people and it is a lot easier for me in real life as Sandi. Weird but true.

    Of course, I tend to dress to be noticed and it seems to work for me ; )

    Sandi

  8. #8
    Gold Member Sometimes Steffi's Avatar
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    There's a line at the end of the movie "Tootsie".

    But I was a better man with you, as a woman... than I ever was with a woman, as a man. You know what I mean? I just gotta learn to do it without the dress.
    Hi, I'm Steffi and I'm a crossdresser... And I accept and celebrate both sides of me. Or, maybe I'm gender fluid.

  9. #9
    Exploring NEPA now Cheryl T's Avatar
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    The one that stands out most for me happened about 10 years ago.
    We were shopping at Macy's and wouldn't you know it nature called. We all have trepidation about using the ladies restroom and so we're more aware of those around us. Well, I finished, went to the sink to wash my hands and then turned to use the hand dryer. Wouldn't you know there was a woman there with 2 little girls. Children can be our worst enemy in situations like this.
    Well, the little girl had hair half way down her back and was standing under the dryer with her hair blowing around like she was in a commercial. She was laughing and having a great time. The mother saw me approaching, looked at me then to her daughter and said "that's enough honey, let the nice lady use it now". We smiled at each other and they left.

    Another time, again at Macy's, I was in the dressing room trying on a dress. My wife was wandering the racks and I wanted her to give her opinion on the dress. I strolled out to the entrance of the dressing room and was searching the racks for her and this older woman was standing there. She saw me looking around and said, "don't worry hun, he's going to love you in that dress". Well, that made my day for sure and my wife got a chuckle out of it too.
    I don't wear women's clothes, I wear MY clothes !

  10. #10
    Member Georgia_Maine's Avatar
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    The one that stands out for me was while leaving a store. I reached in to change to my sunglasses and as I did a young man outside rushed to the door and held it open for me! Of course I said, "Thank you".
    Georgia (Gigi) Maine

  11. #11
    Senior Member Adelaide's Avatar
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    I had many...but the one that still makes me laugh the most was at Costco.
    I'm in line waiting to have my items scanned and pay....then when it gets to my turn, I hand out my Costco membership card....on which there's my male picture on it. The lady looks at me, looks at the picture and relooks at me again.....and says "Ma"am, you are so much prettier in real life. Please go at the member's counter and get a new picture taken".

  12. #12
    Gold Member Helen_Highwater's Avatar
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    I can't recall having a bad direct interaction apart from a petrol garage attendant pointedly saying, "Thanks, MATE" but he was a d?$K head in my eyes and just let that slide. Had a couple of disapproving looks over the years but never anything actually said.

    Positives: Sat in the car when a late teens, early twenties girl walk passed with her much younger brother. Spotting me I saw her mouth something at me and took it to be a negative. Well she walked around to the drivers side and through the glass I could just make out it was, "Wow, you look amazing!". Well not that amazing that I got read I suppose but never the less I'll take it. So I wound down the window and I thanked her for her kind words and it was at this point I noticed her younger brother looking at me with puzzlement on his face. Quizzically he looked at me and said "Are you a man?" You've got to be honest with kids so I replied yes I am. "Oh" came back and that was really the end of it.

    I've chatted with folks while on public transport, SA's when buying things. Conversations usually started by them which sometimes makes me wonder if they're in fact checking me out. Compliments on what I'm wearing are common, it's a woman thing I guess and all are gratefully received.

    Also had doors held open for me a number of times which is always nice and gets a smile and a "Thank you, that was kind of you" from me in return. I feel telling people they've been kind makes them more likely to be kind in the future. I remember getting into a lift with an elderly chap who was the perfect gentleman and did the "Please, after you" both in and out.
    Who dares wears Get in, get out without being noticed

  13. #13
    Super Moderator char GG's Avatar
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    Nice responses. You may be the only CDer that someone has ever "realized" that they've seen. The lasting impression that you give regarding the kindness of your response, may be how the person thinks of "all CDers".

    Well done.

  14. #14
    Senior Member jjjjohanne's Avatar
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    I present male, but wear women's clothing.

    * I was in a consignment shop, wearing all male clothes. I was holding a dress on a hanger. The owner walked past me and leaned and said in a low voice, "You can try that on if you want to."
    * I was eating at a Subway. A man was the only other person in the restaurant. We started talking. When he got up to leave, he awkwardly said, "I like your dress."
    * I was walking down the sidewalk. I woman was walking toward me. I said, "I love your sweater." She said, "I love YOUR skirt."
    * I was at a church that I had visited a couple times in a dress. The pastor's wife saw me and remembered my name and gave me a hug.
    * Perhaps my favorite: In the grocery store, a woman came up to me with a handwritten note. It said, "You are beautiful!" (She also said it, "I just want you to know that you are beautiful. Just beautiful." She welled up while saying it.) ...She must have bad eye-sight. HA!

    Joey
    I am a man who presents male and wears feminine clothes.
    I blog about my outings: https://joeypress.wordpress.com/

  15. #15
    Board-Certified Shaman LaSirenaBella's Avatar
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    Good for you, Prazia.

    Those kinds of small encounters really fill your heart. I tend to get my share while I'm out and about, just running errands.
    Sirena Rivera
    "Because when you stop and look around, this life is pretty amazing." - Theodor S. Geisel

  16. #16
    Hot Geezer Girl docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    Great interactions, Prazia!

    But??? IRL: Inevitably Reach Limits? Incovenient Reaction to Lesbiens?
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

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