Men do, women don't..

[SaraLin]

... get a thrill out of wearing the opposite sex's clothing?

In another thread, Docrobbysherry made the comment:

I've yet to hear of a woman who was turned on wearing men's things!

And, very few, if any, men who weren't at one time or another when dressing in women's!

and it got me thinking, but I didn't want to hijack that thread.
So - I'll start a new one.

---I'd love to hear your thoughts on this.---

Like Doc said, there is a "thrill" factor involved when men dress femme, that doesn't seem to be there when women dress drab.
"Why is that?", I wondered. Then it hit me.

Maybe - just maybe, it's because of the "built in" social concept of feminine beauty and desirability.

Don't we (as born-male) people dress up because we want(at least in part) to be, feel, or at least look more desirable? let's face it, men's clothing isn't really designed to look or feel sexy. What better way to feel that tingle than to try to look like what you like?

Do (born-female) people get tired of all the looks, comments, and pressure to always be attractive?
Maybe they don't want to be a turn-on for every pair of men's eyes.
So- what to wear that won't be an enticement? Let's face it. Even women's tee shirts and jeans usually are shaped to flatter or enhance their form.

What better way to escape the sex-you-up fashion trend than to put on a baggy men's shirt or some shapeless jeans?
Maybe GG's wear them (in part?) because they AREN'T a turn on - and maybe even a "turn-it-off" for a bit"?

What say you? GG's I'd like to hear your thoughts too!

Sara

[Julie Frisky]

I agree in part about what you are saying, but I partly think because women can wear clothes similar to mens styles as the norm, but men wearing female styles is against the norm in society, so maybe the thrill partly comes from it being a little taboo, it's only thought.

[Niccar]

I agree Julie.

[Claire M]

Where's the thrill in wearing things that are rough, plain, bulky and drab? Alot of women's clothing are designed or marketed to enhance(?) women's physical assets ... to be sexy. Think about it ... when was the last time you saw mens boxers marketed as "sexy". When a guy goes on a first date, he might put on a clean polo. Women might have a server set of underwear, wear a top that shows a little more cleavage or a higher hem line. They may struggle deciding between 2 or 3 different outfits.

So back to the original question ... Men get a sexual thrill out of women's clothing, even if they're not wearing them (or have any interest to do so). What's to get excited about men's clothing (for anybody)

[Helen_Highwater]

I agree in part about what you are saying, but I partly think because women can wear clothes similar to mens styles as the norm, but men wearing female styles is against the norm in society, so maybe the thrill partly comes from it being a little taboo, it's only thought.

I tend to agree. Women have a green light to dress as they wish, none of the taboos that exist for men. A woman can put on a man's suit and have it called chic.

[nvlady]

Forbidden fruit.
It is acceptable for women to wear jeans and/or flannel shirts, but men have been told all their lives that women's clothes and playing with dolls or playing girls games are a big no no.

[JohnH]

I consider the idea of "Forbidden Fruit", that is, boys being prohibited from wearing women's clothes and playing with dolls or playing girls games, as a form of child abuse. Mercifully I was spared from it.
My mother taught me how to cook and how to apply lipstick. And my paternal grandmother taught me how to apply nail polish.
I have gotten virtually no pushback from wearing dresses, even at church. So I believe men's inhibitions of wearing feminine attire are mostly in their heads.
And why are men's "fashions" so dull and dreary? There was the "Great Male Renunciation" starting around 1750 where men's fashions became utilitarian and prosaic.

John

[SophiaRose]

Im with Claire on this. Mens clothes are so blaaa. Women?s can be so dramatic and eye catching they draw us in - As they should I guess.

[Brynna M]

Knowing full well I’m a man observing women from the outside, I would say women get much more excitement out of women’s clothing than both men and women get out of men’s style clothing and general appearance. I’d agree that getting dressed day to day in gender normative clothing isn’t sexual for anyone but that special opportunity to look good has a sexual component for many people.

[char GG]

I've said this before. I don't wear "men's clothes". I wear women's clothes that made to fit women, from the women's department, whether it's jeans or whatever. I don't wear "lumberjack" clothes either.

If you find men's clothes boring, then you aren't looking for men's clothes that are attractive. Where I work, I see men wearing the most awesome "men's" clothes. Sequin, colorful, flowered, or embroidered shirts, shiny and or nicely fitted pants, shoes with embellishments, or chunky heels. Women are attracted to men wearing clothes that enhance their masculinity. I realize that doesn't make a difference to those on this forum who just like to wear women's clothes.

Women are not "turned on" by wearing underwear or dresses. Many don't want attention (unless clubbing or something) for what they are wearing. It's no wonder those that just want to be left alone and fly under the radar. A pretty 20's something lady just wants to live their life like a 20 something guy does. Many younger women want to be acknowledged for their brains.
If you want to wear women's clothes, so be it. Do it. Don't try to justify it. That's just wear what you want.

[docrobbysherry]

All I can say is, "Great minds think alike", SaraLin!

My only add is; You've explained perfectly why I prefer to dress drab rather than "dress to blend"!

[Jean O]

The best fitting jeans I ware are a pair from Gloria Vanderbilt. Still working on the best top to complement my bra and breast forms.

[Dutchess]

Well , women( mostly) aren't attempting to be men...I don't actually know anyone who wears male clothing. I never have . While the demographics of this forum are somewhat older, I see a alot of naivety here and alot of sexual inexperience too and I think it's both of those things.. for some of these men it's the hottest most edgiest thing they've ever done .. and for somebody like me it's nothing.

I feel bad for some of you all, some of your lives must have been very very repressive.

Men don't cat call me they know better... even in public . I present a certain way, they know better. I had a 24 year old man, good looking guy too,an RN ,chat me up at the store a couple weeks ago and asked me out on a date ... He also did not ask me for my number, he knew that I wouldn't want to do that so instead he gave me his number and told me just to hang on to it and text him or call him if I ever felt like it. We were in a very long line and we're able to talk for about an hour. This is the third young person in their twenties that's done that with me in the past couple of years.
Most men tend to treat me like this very gentlemanly, with a lot of manners.


There are absolutely men's clothing made of silk ,satin, all kinds of beautiful materials and patterns. Jacquards , paisleys ,florals of all kinds velvets ,all colors all cuts.
There's a silver Paisley ,oh my God!!!!! it's silver and aqua Paisley down on the boulevard it is this beautiful silk and satin suit!!! oh I wished I had a boyfriend!!!! I would dress him up in that and we would just party all night long... hahahaha
Oh well lol
You all just don't want to wear them- that's the truth of it bc you ( I am not talking to Sara or anyone in particular ) don't get off on those like you do the women's clothing. Char is right, the justification here is some of the most epic I have ever witnessed ..

The men here in LA/Orange county /Inland Empire / SanDiego - SOCAL wear all kinds of extremely chic expensive things and look out of this world good .. I mean fine .. Very very hot .. I guess they missed the memo they shouldn't wear such things .. ( or cry or laugh or like the color pink , buy fresh flowers ?? and other things I read here that you all cant do here dressed as males )

[CynthiaD]

Ok, guys, try this. Get yourself a really nice looking suit, a couple of nice ties and dress shirts and some new shoes. Buy yourself a fedora to top it off. Get dressed up in this stuff, and go someplace where there are a lot of women. Walk around for a while and check out the women's reactions. You'll get a lot of attention. Women like sharp-looking men's clothing. Or as ZZ Top said "Every girl crazy ’bout a sharp-dressed man."

Men's clothing isn't boring unless you want it to be.

[docrobbysherry]

Wow, Duchess! U touched a lot of buttons!

I've never even thot about wearing flashy, gay, or androgenous men's clothes except at Halloween before I began CDing. Why? I never thot about this until now, but I guess because I don't want to look like a swishy man? But, I'm ok with being seen as a MIAD, rite? No, I can't explain that either!

And, u mentioned how gentlemanly men r with u. Which remended me that I've been hit on by maybe a dozen men in person. And, every single man acted gentlemanly, even drunk. Most were under 45 I'd guess?
Yet, so many posts here r warning dressers to be very careful when out and about. Good advice I agree.
Even tho my experiences in clubs and bars across the country have not been problematic at all!

[mykell]

just a point ive seen....i attended pflag support group in my area.
long skirts. no heels it wasn't practical....gave up counting at say 75 female to male folks, maybe 10 FTM identities....i thought who wouldn't want to be a pretty girl
any way ive never asked any if it made them feel sexy but they described it as they feel right.

nowadays im out twice a week doing volunteer gigs, flared pants make my feet look smaller....tops that hide my diabetic belly.

when i first got here flashy heels and skirts posted in the gallery with tons of compliments.

now when i post at an event its pretty practical, flats, jeans and a nice top and hardly anyone will post on those types of looks, not really sure ive made my point?

so truthfully if you saw my pinterest account you would say total diva....a glamazon as i call myself but its hard and unpractical.

i volunteer at a thrift store near asbury nj and we do get some very nice donations but ive never seen any as flashy that some have described here.

and with all i do i still live a male life and still find some very nice shirts to take home and wear to work.
of course the percentage of male to female findings tilts way to the F side....

[Marketa]

All of you are right and I'll add also a bit of my thoughts.

Let's be frank here: men's bodies aren't sexy. They might be well built and that making them attractive to women, but in general men's bodies aren't sexy. They weren't designed like that. They are supposed to be strong for survival and that's what made them desirable in the past (hunters gatherers society).

On the other hand women's bodies are sexy, because they needed to attract men.

And even as people and our society evolved these basics are still ingrained in our brains, even if we don't realize it. And that's why most female clothing are made to make women look "sexy", or better said to enhance their qualities, but men's clothing are made primarily to make them look bigger.

And you have take into account also simple way of doing things just out of "habit". That's why female clothes still have buttons and zippers made in a way that their maid can close them more comfortably.

[Debbie Denier]

I think a lot of men are thrilled to dress up because it goes against all the expected social norms. The only time you hear a boy being called pretty , is when one is referring to a budgie.If somebody called me sexy in male mode I would think it was a wind up. Everyone has different perceptions.

[Brynna M]

as ZZ Top said "Every girl crazy ?bout a sharp-dressed man."

As my wife said ? every man looks good in a tux?.(send a pic from friends wedding) wow you do not look good in a tux!?
My build is a near perfect wide rectangle. It?s like draping a suit an a cinder block. While I may not look good as a woman, shape wear and clothes with structure are fun to play with.

[ColleenA]

The general consensus here seems to be that men's clothes (and bodies) are not sexy, but that women's are. Such a male view. Which is understandable, but how about if we broaden our minds (no pun intended)?

First, ask the GGs if there can be anything sexy about a man's body. When I saw Brad Pitt's abs in "Fight Club," I was envious. Or Chris Hemsworth as Thor. Even if I worked with their trainers, I would have little hope of looking that good.

But can we really make a blanket statement that women's bodies are inherently sexy? Every straight man knows which female body types he finds attractive, and there is a lot of overlap among males. This is why Jenny McCarthy could be in Playboy while her cousin, Melissa McCarthy, could not. But everyone should be honest and admit there are body types they do not find attractive. (I have realized, though, that any woman - of any size - can find at least a few admirers in the male population.)

Now when it comes to clothing, here too we need to expand our thinking. I think it is true that more women's clothes are designed to accentuate the body than men's, but again there can be no blanket statements.

As a senior, when I go out, I am looking to blend in, not stand out, and to be comfortable. Thus, I will wear capris or plain skirts with simple tops and sneakers - utilitarian, not sexy (still thrilling, but not in a sexual way). The dresses I own are nice looking, but I consequently don't wear them as often outside, especially when I am just going to the Target or the strip mall. So for women, there are plenty of clothes that might be classified gender-specific, but not sexy.

As for men's clothing, I appreciate that char GG and Dutchess describe some that can be considered attractive. I want to add another sort as well. In 1990, a documentary called "Paris Is Burning" came out about the vogue/ball culture of New York in the 1980s. Much of the movie was focused on drag queens with their gowns, wigs, makeup, etc. But there was a small segment that introduced me to the concept of drag kings. Yes, that is what you think it is; I don't even need to explain. As I recall, all of the ones shown at these balls wore uniforms. I think we all know that many women find men in uniform (military, police, firefighter) attractive. So there you go - another type of men's clothing that has sex appeal.

And as small as the population of crossdressers is in the male population, I would guess there is an even thinner population of CDs among females - but they do exist.

[Dutchess]

I don't need a large quantity of males " hitting" on me in some bar.

That's not me. I prefer quality over quantity any day. At our age, attracting herds of males of any age would tell me that I am not putting myself out there correctly. This time I did not show a video of the clothing either I merely talked about it and right away I get insulted for it even just in words.

No you never thought about being a swishy man because you're wearing a latex suit in public I guess. I don't know.
You do your thing and I'll do mine.

[Stephanie47]

Whether it be male or female clothing I always want to look "nice, clean and attractive." A guy should not look like a slob if there is no reason to look like "Pigpen" of the "Peanuts" comic strip. I feel very comfortable in a filthy tee shirt and jeans with sweat dripping of my brow as I dig a hole in the backyard. When I was still working in a professional office environment I never wore a white dress shirt. I expressed myself with colors and ties. Many times professional visitors took me for the boss because the boss was not dressed professionally. As a retire it's a lot of graphic tee shirts that get a lot of smiles and may give rise to a conversation.

In my early puberty days there was a sexual component to wearing my mother's attire, but self gratification with a copy of Playboy magazine would be any different? I suppose anybody would run the risk of only being stimulated sexually by only one thing. I do not get sexually excited by male attire and never have. I am long past getting sexually stimulated by female attire on my body. If anybody cares about sexual stimulation there are plenty of on-line article concerning self-stimulation, male and female.

I do agree, I have never encountered a woman who said she was stimulated when wearing male attire. The females in my family have/do wear male attire because of functionality and price, e.g. slim jeans for guys and flannel shirts.

[SaraLin]

Interesting responses, everyone. Thank you for that. Differing ideas always give me more food for thought.


Char, while I think you were disagreeing with me, this snippet is sort of what I was trying to say:

Women are not "turned on" by wearing underwear or dresses. Many don't want attention (unless clubbing or something) for what they are wearing. It's no wonder those that just want to be left alone and fly under the radar. A pretty 20's something lady just wants to live their life like a 20 something guy does.

CD males have their reasons for dressing femme.
I tend to believe that GG ladies who wear men's things have entirely different reasons.
I'm just wondering if trying to NOT attract attention, particularly from men, might be one factor.

[Philipa Jane]

As a younger male I wore a boiler suit to work but went out in a suit of a different kind. With beautiful shirts of chiffon and silk
When I got married things changed and I was no longer the smartly dressed male. Just tidy and un-noticeable.

I don't do dreary anymore.
Anytime I go out I dress for me and I like to think I do it with style.
I think I blend in but there again I do stand out because so many GG's dress so casual. Tidy but not really noticeable.
Today I went to a restaurant in a black pantsuit and had a patron (GG) remark to me that I looked very elegant.
This made my day.
(Sometimes I just wish I could take a decent photograph.)
The pantsuit was from Temu which was even better in my eyes for the compliment as it only cost me $20 AU.
When we went to order food one of my companions said she wished she had dressed up. Maybe I am having a positive influence here.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Ws've got a long way to go to get the Bubble in the Middle.