Are you truly a crossdresser?

[Rikkicn]

The is a quote from a 1990 paper written by Holly Boswell. I found it very interesting and wondered what others might think.

I would like to offer a challenge to those of us who are uncertain about defining ourselves as strictly crossdressers or transsexual people. Are you truly a crossdresser, or is this only an indication of far greater potential for gender evolution, which is turn a deeper imperative for personal growth and integration? If you believe yourself to be transsexual, are you losing as much ground as you are gaining? Are you unnecessarily sacrificing your preferred style of lovemaking, or your ability to procreate (especially if you’re a lesbian)? Are you truly becoming yourself, with a long-term life-plan intact, or are you allowing yourself to be compromised by external expectations? Our high-tech culture promises a quick fix, but there are significant health risks. Your life is precious, and good health is crucial. The freedom to choose one’s gender is a potent sword that cuts both ways. Be true to yourself.

Love,
Rikki

[gennee]

This is an interesting article, Rikki. I started crossdressing last year and I can say that I do it because I love it. I have a saying:'Never let others define who you are'. I have passed a number of threshholds in this journey and have been better for it.

Gennee

[MarinaTwelve200]

Nearly EVERYONE here is a crossdresser whether we are transsexual or not. Crossdressing is what one DOES not what one is.

It is an ACT engaged in for many different reasons and can be a 'symptom" of, or a reaction to several different, unrelated conditions. Its kinda like a cough. One may cough because one has Pneumonia, a simple Cold or merly has something stuck in one's throught. So to call one a "Cougher" because one coughs really makes little sense---Just as calling a person a Crossdresser makes little sense.

We crossdress for many reasons-- Some more profound than others and mostly unrelated---We may be playing with IDENTITY. We may have Sexuality problems or only using CD as a form of relaxation or a fetish. Even some forms of SM include crossdressing.

My point is --That Crossdressing is nothing more than wearing the clothing of the opposite sex, and really says nothing as to the WHY. Yes Transsexuals may crossdress, but so may a straight guy with a fetish or some homosexuals---ALL different conditions that only have crossdressing in common--and done for different reasons.

[Maria D]

Nearly EVERYONE here is a crossdresser whether we are transsexual or not. Crossdressing is what one DOES not what one is.

It is an ACT engaged in for many different reasons and can be a 'symptom" of, or a reaction to several different, unrelated conditions.

Crossdressing is what someone does, it is the act. A crossdresser is someone who performs that act, and is defined by the fact that they perform it. It is perfectly valid to call someone a crossdresser. I would call a brick layer a brick layer without knowing or caring the reason they were laying the bricks.

The article seems to ask if some people stop there, and perhaps deny certain aspects of themselves, in order to be 'feminine' or 'masculine', rather than just being 'themselves' with the comfy bits of both. Interesting.

Take care

[btmgrl6]

I am a ts(non-op as yet)i suppose. Iam evolving into that which I truly believe I was meant to be.
....a female. I 've had these feelings for as long as I can remember..Something just wasn't right. It took a many years and a lot of therapy, but I am finally free of external expectations And free to pratice my preferred style of lovemaking and very comfortable with Stepf. And I agree that cd's do it for many different reasons,and that crossdressing is what one does, not what one is.

Steph

gaining ground, very much so..........

[jessica duprea]

I cross dress so i am a cross dresser.
If I had the cash and was not in my current relationship, I would have breast, Vagina, FFS, longer hair, no body hair, and I would never go back.

When I am horny I crave a man so what of it.

Not sure what that makes me, there are way to many labels can we get rid of a few.

please

I like these

[stephanie100]

I cross dress so i am a cross dresser.
If I had the cash and was not in my current relationship, I would have breast, Vagina, FFS, longer hair, no body hair, and I would never go back.

When I am horny I crave a man so what of it.

Not sure what that makes me, there are way to many labels can we get rid of a few.

please

I agree compleatly.

[Donna Delite]

Yes, I truly am a cd ! For me there are no underlying issues, I don't want to be a full time woman. I've been dressing for 30 yrs and by now know exactly who and what I am, and that's a crossdresser. My temporary journeys into womanhood is all I need and am glad of it. I feel sorry for those of us who can't or won't accept the facts.

[Nigella]

There are many labels given to people, and to fit into society we all need a pigeon hole to slot into. People may call me what they will, it matters to me not one little jot, I am content with my life and giving me another label will not alter that.

[Deanna2]

At the risk of misquoting a great philospher here, but I think he said something like ' I think, therefore I am'.

I wear femme gear a lot. Therefore I am --------- 'very happy, relaxed and comfortable'.

[Faye Emmette]

Oo aye!
And a Bikie. A Father and Grandfather and once an analytical chemist.
Many descriptions of me. It's just the first one was the hardest to come to terms with.
F.

[Tina Dixon]

Just a crossdresser, i have thought where will it lead? But at the moment just a CD.

[Ms. Donna]

Nearly EVERYONE here is a crossdresser whether we are transsexual or not. Crossdressing is what one DOES not what one is.

It is an ACT engaged in for many different reasons and can be a 'symptom" of, or a reaction to several different, unrelated conditions. Its kinda like a cough. One may cough because one has Pneumonia, a simple Cold or merly has something stuck in one's throught. So to call one a "Cougher" because one coughs really makes little sense---Just as calling a person a Crossdresser makes little sense.

We crossdress for many reasons-- Some more profound than others and mostly unrelated---We may be playing with IDENTITY. We may have Sexuality problems or only using CD as a form of relaxation or a fetish. Even some forms of SM include crossdressing.

My point is --That Crossdressing is nothing more than wearing the clothing of the opposite sex, and really says nothing as to the WHY. Yes Transsexuals may crossdress, but so may a straight guy with a fetish or some homosexuals---ALL different conditions that only have crossdressing in common--and done for different reasons.

Crossdressing is what someone does, it is the act. A crossdresser is someone who performs that act, and is defined by the fact that they perform it. It is perfectly valid to call someone a crossdresser. I would call a brick layer a brick layer without knowing or caring the reason they were laying the bricks.

The article seems to ask if some people stop there, and perhaps deny certain aspects of themselves, in order to be 'feminine' or 'masculine', rather than just being 'themselves' with the comfy bits of both. Interesting.

• I wear clothing intended for women
• In that respect, I crossdress.
• Ergo, I am a crossdresser.

Q.E.D.

Love & Stuff,
Donna

[Adrienne Heels]

I dress because I like to be in women's clothing...especially jewelry and heels. But I am straight, a married man with 2 kids. I have intense desires to dress, and it may well be an identity issue. I do have some very feminine tendencies, but also many masculine ones. I think my dressing (and shopping!) helps me deal with my feminine issues and keeps me sane.

[Monica Elena]

Yes, I truly am a cd ! For me there are no underlying issues, I don't want to be a full time woman. I've been dressing for 30 yrs and by now know exactly who and what I am, and that's a crossdresser. My temporary journeys into womanhood is all I need and am glad of it. I feel sorry for those of us who can't or won't accept the facts.

I strongly agree with Donna.

I am a crossdresser and glad of it even I love to wear dresses, heels, makeup and when dressed I express my female self.

[Rikkicn]

The title of this thread "Are you truly a crossdresser" was a sentence from the article. I didn't mean to question those here but rather was interested in all of our thoughts and feelings relative to what Ms. Boswell had written.
Sorry, my mistake

Rikki

[EricaCD]

Don't apologize. It's an interesting question.

The more freedom I get to dress, the more it becomes clear that I do, in fact, max out. Of course, I cannot unconditionally guarantee what the future will bring. However, based on the empirical evidence of the last several years, I'd say the odds are excellent that I will end up being nothing more than a garden variety CD. That's quite enough to keep me content.

Erica

[Eric/a]

As long as we're quoting and adapting famous sayings, wasn't it Sigmund Freud who said, "Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar?" For us, it could be "Sometimes a CD is just a CD," meaning that some of us dress up because it's fun and let it go at that. We enjoy it well enough not to see the need to look for so-called hidden causes and get tangled up in "this means this and that means that."

[livy_m_b]

For myself, I'm as good a woman as I can be; for my spouse, I'm as good a man as I can be. It's not perfect, but it's where life has placed me and it works.

[AZGia]

For me I make it simple, I am who I am, my labels are George, Gia, Bear and anything else you would like to call me. I dress and do what I do because that is me and nothing more. Simple isn't it.

[HaleyPink2000]

For myself, I'm as good a woman as I can be; for my spouse, I'm as good a man as I can be. It's not perfect, but it's where life has placed me and it works.

livy:

I like your comment and would like to point out what you said. It's a really big statement that most might have over looked. Also so very true.


"For myself, I'm as good a woman as I can be",

What a cool statement, I'd love to steel this comment to use in the future.

HGz.

[~Dee~]

im TS, and i think that this is the sort of questioning that i had to come to terms with before i could feel comfortable saying that i was.
it can be a big step, so figuring the things that you are giving up and what you are gaining are a must... i dont think the label needs to be there, just the element of choice.
to me, i feel that the gains far outway the losses.

when it comes down to it, its the same thing that i seem to end up telling people.. 'its just.. me' .. im not trying to be someone else or meet anyone else expectations of what it is to be me. ultimately, its always going to be me who decides, because its me who has to live with the changes.

i dont think that there are quick fixes, especially not in this sort of field, i have no delusions that things might get extremely difficult over time.. but all in all.. im doing it, because 'its just me'...

[Caitlintgsd]

Nearly EVERYONE here is a crossdresser whether we are transsexual or not. Crossdressing is what one DOES not what one is.

Clothingwise I crossdress. In my head I'm a ts, non-op for now. I don't really have a burning desire to cut off any body parts because they don't bother me. I don't really use those things anyway. I am on HRT and love it.

[Siobhan Marie]

For me I make it simple, I am who I am, my labels are George, Gia, Bear and anything else you would like to call me. I dress and do what I do because that is me and nothing more. Simple isn't it.

couldn't agree more. I am who I am.

Anna x

[Nlenro-nu2]

Crossdressing is what someone does, it is the act. A crossdresser is someone who performs that act, and is defined by the fact that they perform it. It is perfectly valid to call someone a crossdresser. I would call a brick layer a brick layer without knowing or caring the reason they were laying the bricks.

The article seems to ask if some people stop there, and perhaps deny certain aspects of themselves, in order to be 'feminine' or 'masculine', rather than just being 'themselves' with the comfy bits of both. Interesting.

Take care

Hi! I'm Nlenro-nu2 Your message above is pretty accurate. You sound like you know what you're talking about. Oh by the way I do bricklaying and I do crossdressing! I do homaker work too! I just wish I could live as a female crossdressed without some jerk insulting me or remarking He Ain't Woman! I hate such jerks!