Whats wrong with Closet dressing?

[tekla west]

You should be part of the first liberated generation, not the last unliberated one. Susie

Right on Sister. Except I would change "should" to "CAN," particulary where it addressed at youger people. But the CAN works at any age. You DON"T HAVE TO do it, but it CAN be done. Given the option, the choice is yours, but liberation sounds better than repression. Given that you DO have a choice, the results are in your own hands. The pain you signed up for, the suffering is only an option.

[Carroll]

You know Jane, it took me a while to get the nerve to dress in front of my wife. She knew I dressed but never saw me. My fear was she was going to laugh her ass off....she did, but she did say I looked pretty good.
Nver rush into anything you are not ready to do. Stay in the closet if that is your choice. If you chose to come out go at the pace and direction the YOU want to go. I do see some people here that basically say "throw caution in the wind and go for it!". They mean no harm its just thats what they did and they way they feel. Remember, Its all about you baby!

Carroll

[Mary Jane]

To thine own self be true. I also feel no need to "come out" to everyone. I have a couple of select friends that know of my dressing but for the most part it is a private thing for me too. Just do what you feel is right for you. As has been said, all of us are different.

[Lisa Golightly]

I think fashion is a very personal thing. What you wear is an expression of your personality. I express a feminine personality and that's that. No pressure, no demands, no crusade.

[suanne]

[QUOTE=Janereed]hello everyone,


There is people sometimes quite blatantly telling you to "Get out of the crossdressing closet" "Tell people" etc.
Im not drilling anyone one member is particular, but its genrally the older amoungst us, telling us young-uns. It can really confuse one, make them feel rejected or worse. (A quote from Janereed)

Hi. Ummmmmm older as in age, been on forum for ages, or been a crossdresser (or whatever) for a long time? If it's age. I don't feel like the older are putting pressure on anybody to "come out" of anything. cders on this forum show respect for who ever you are and how you dress. No pressure there. I am a long time crossdresser and am still in the closet and am going to stay there (I have a light in my closet) forever if I have anything to do about it. Thats my 0.02. Sounds like the pressure is on your end. Relax.....if it feels good.....do it!

Suanne

[Jackie-Ann]

To thine own self be true. I also feel no need to "come out" to everyone. I have a couple of select friends that know of my dressing but for the most part it is a private thing for me too. Just do what you feel is right for you. As has been said, all of us are different.

Hi, Mary Jane, like you and many more, CD is something very personal and going out in public areas, like shopping, walking down the street, it doesn't fit me for a logical reason: "I don't pass as a woman,neither my looks or my voice". So I don't like the feeling of being part of a show to others because our society, especially men ( being born a male, I know) will undoubtly think or call me a homo.So I'm comfortable with the privacy of my home and my wife's acceptance of my female persona in and out of bed anytime of the day without questions. I'm moderate regarding make-up and dressing fully all the time.Having my body smooth (hairless) and wearing panties and gowns are enough most of the time.The only person that I care about acceptance is Cheryl, my GG wife. She knows that we could go and I'ld dress up in a private home or a club where there are other couples like us. Now we live in a small city in a small country in S.A., when we lived in the U.S. we never had the chance to find other couples or clubs because our busy schedule. I doubt very seriously that I ever going to enjoy being live with other CD's like me, talking and sharing our "things".That's life, when I was living in a country where you can find the people I never had the time to do it, now that we're retired we live far off from the CD scene.

[Ranee Daze]

By my terms I am closeted as you are. What this means to me is that I live the separate lives and keep my two sexual identities apart. I go out dressed, but no one in this world is able to connect my manself with my femmeself. I like having residences in both worlds. I have no desire to come out of that closet for it would have disasterous effects on my work, my family and my relationships.
There are alot more posts about coming out than there are about happily managing life in the closet. Maybe we can strike more of a balance.
As far as it being an age thingie, well I am 49 and I love the closet!

[EricaCD]

No pressure, no demands, no crusade.

Couldn't have stated the general premise better.

I will, however, add that this forum unabashedly strives to help every CD find a greater sense of self-acceptance and self comfort. And to the extent this forum succeeds, many of the members (myself included) rethink their self-imposed desire for total privacy. My sense is that the numerous posts regarding "first time shopping", "first time out", etc. are a celebration of that increased self-acceptance, as opposed to a sense of giving in to CD peer pressure (god what a weird concept).

Erica

[Jackie-Ann]

Couldn't have stated the general premise better.

I will, however, add that this forum unabashedly strives to help every CD find a greater sense of self-acceptance and self comfort. And to the extent this forum succeeds, many of the members (myself included) rethink their self-imposed desire for total privacy. My sense is that the numerous posts regarding "first time shopping", "first time out", etc. are a celebration of that increased self-acceptance, as opposed to a sense of giving in to CD peer pressure (god what a weird concept).

Erica

Hi, Erica, In your case, you can pass very well as GG. My wife and I looked at your album and she was stunned at your pictures. Your natural looks are delicate. You're probably a hansome man and a gorgeous looking woman.Thank you for sharing with us your album.

[Mia001]

Hi Jane,

It's very simple. If you don't want to tell people, for whatever reason, then don't. It's your choice and, as no one here knows your situation as well as you do, then it has to be your choice.

People here will have advice to offer. That's part of the support generated by these forums. What worked out so well for them may be a disaster for you though. The best advice I can offer to post any questions you may have, read the responses and then make up your own mind.

I have told my best friend but no one else so I'm really still in the closet myself except for one person which suits me fine. People here have given me great support which is always welcome and very much appreciated but, at the end of the day, the only person qualified to make decisions for me is me.

Take care,

Mark.

[Sky]

Now we live in a small city in a small country in S.A....
...That's life, when I was living in a country where you can find the people I never had the time to do it, now that we're retired we live far off from the CD scene.

I assume S.A. is South America. If it's not being too indiscrete, where in SA are you now? If you prefer to answer via private msg is fine.

Because you know, I'm from there too and I know some cities are actually more cd friendly than the vast majority of US cities...

[noname]

Instead I spent ALL that time closeted, hiding my desires, building an elaborate facade of masculinity to hide how I really felt inside. Almost all of my "masculinity" was not the real me. I had to be a "male chauvinist pig", I had to stay out of the kitchen and laundry, I had to burp and fart loudly in public, get falling down drunk with the guys, never do a lick of housework, Be disdainful of women's accomplishments, etc.,etc. All of this was made up in order to convince myself and others that I was a "real guy". What a waste of a life!!!

Well said. Though I was never took on the male pig roll. I will say I'm a bit surprised by how many closet people are here.

I think fashion is a very personal thing. What you wear is an expression of your personality.

Yup, I'm all about the fashion.

[susie lynn]

Hi Girls, Ive dressed for over 40 yrs and have never went out except once on halloween , plus I dont wear the breast ,wig or makeup except for pics, I have no desire to look like a girl, even though it does sound fun .
I enjoy wearing the clothes minus the bra and Im happy with that, there
most likely not too many that are like me but everyone has their likes and wants so do what you want not what someone else might want or think

[Barb Valentine]

I'm no spring chicken
And I like the comfort of my nice air conditioned closet
Where I can wear what I want and don't care how I look
I don't have to please anybody but myself