I guess this is a purge

[Star]

good luck....if you can get out of this it is great i suppose.. hang on to your stuff though...

[gennee]

[SIZE="4"]Congratulations on find true love, Natalie. I wish the best for both of. I'm with Steph and Kelly on keeping your stuff. I believe in rainy days.

Gennee[/SIZE]

[kiwigirl]

Have purged twice and it is really expensive to restock a couple of years later. A girl must always put something aside for a rainy day (so to speak)

[Siobhan Marie]

Agree with the others:
1. You must tell Sandie of your CD past. Has she told you of her past issues?
2. Don't purge! Store. I have purged 3 times and had to re-supply
3. Your desire to CD will return.

Vikki

[SIZE="3"]Can only agree with the other girls. Please don't purge, store it as its costly and heartbreaking to have to replace everything, I've been there myself and its not a nice place to go. I want to take this opportunity to wish you well with your new relationship, but please please don't purge.

huge Anna x[/SIZE]

[Melissa A.]

Hi Natalie,

I hope you work things out with the woman in your life, and sincerely hope you find happiness.

I would also like to, even though I'm repeating others here, share my feelings and experiences. Like you, when I met my first wife, I fell head over heels in love, like I never thought I could before. And like you, the urge to crossdress completely melted away. At this point in my life, I was still firmly in the closet and had already been through several purges. I always thought it was the crossdressing, even though it brought me happiness and peace while doing it, that was the problem in my life, because it also seemed to bring me much conflict and pain. Before we married, I told her about my past, and also told her that crosdressing was a part of my past, not my future. This was not a bald-face lie, as it was what I truly believed at the time. She was very understanding, and seemed very open minded about the whole thing. Didn't even say a negative word about cross dressing. Afterwards, she even occasionally let me wear bras and panties when we slept or made love, perhaps thinking that if she allowed a little bit, the urge to fully crossdress would remain a part of my past.

Well, it didn't. As our relationship continued, and we settled into our day-to-day life together, the old feelings started to return. The first time, and every time, she came home unexpectedley and caught me dressing, she went through the roof. There were many such incidents. She never left me over it, our relationship ended for mostly other reasons. But it sure didn't help! And I spent alot of money purging and buying, and also making promises I just never could keep, ultimately. She was not a closed minded , ignorant person. As a matter of fact, she is quite intelligent. But as she told me many times, "I simply don't want a husband that wears make-up, high heels, and skirts". You can't blame anyone for feeling the way they feel. I do, however, take solace in the fact that I tried to be honest with her before we married.

I'm not telling you what to do, or what will happen with you. Everyone is different, and unlike you, I have been a crossdresser since as far back as I can remember, at least since I was 4 years old. Obviously, and as those who know me here know, my life has changed quite a bit, and I now accept and am content with who and what I am.

All I am saying is "never say never", cause ya truly never know. Be prepared for that.

An ironic postscript to my story: Her and I were talking once recently (we get along fine), and she said to me that she had done some research after we split up, and all other things in our married life being ok(they weren't) she probably would have eventually been willing to reach a compromise on my cding. Really shocked me.

Just goes ta show ya, ya never know.

Wishing you luck and strength.

Hugs,

Melissa