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Latex Lover
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no time like the present
I made the mistake of waiting too long in my first marriage to bring up the subject, only to learn as time went on that she had a huge disdain for any man who would willing wear her lingerie...so, for 15 years, I hid clothes, burned clothes, lied, deceived, and generally placed my heart in my throat whenever i dared to put on a pair of panties. Happily, that marriage ended before I completely lost my marbles, and I vowed to not hold back in my next relationship. I told my current partner there is something she should know about me...something a little strange perhaps but having no bearing on my feelings for her or on my manhood...and I just blurted it out. What followed was a great discussion about sexuality, likes and dislikes, and her affirmation that if dressing was something I liked to do, then she was all for it. That was four years ago and her acceptance keeps getting better. Hope that helps! Luv, Bev
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Velvet Crossdresseruperer
Hi Jenny,
I think Julie sums it up very well. As always, her posts are very insightful.
(I also think she will make an excellent moderator!)
Anyway, I can only speak from my personal experience with Tamara.
When we first met we hit it off instantly. I pratically moved in with her within a few days. After a few weeks, Tamara and her friend thought it would be a good laugh to put a little dress on me and some make-up. Little knowing I loved every bit of it! With this, I knew she was quite open with these kind of things.
It was after a few months together when I realised I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her and wanted her to know everything about me. No secrets.
I showed her my little skirt and told her I liked wearing it. I was nervous as hell obviously, but I felt like she deserved to know. She was shocked at first, stating she felt betrayed that I didn't tell her sooner, before she developed such strong feelings for me.
She wore my skirt that night and it was incredible. Since then we have had no secrets at all, nothing hidden. We talk openly about what we do and don't like. This way we have a clear understanding of where the borders are, what each other will permit.
I do however place limits on my dressing up. She doesn't like it all the time, which I understand. Sometimes she wants the man in her life to be a man. Other times we play dressup together and have a wild time!
All things in moderation. I think if I constantly walked around in girl clothes it would become too normal. I would loose the great thrill and excitement of when I do get all dressed up.
Like Julie mentions, a good way of testing the water without actually going there, is when watching a television program about crossdressing, what is there reaction? Do they think its funny? cute? kinky? or disgusting and perverted?
You could make little suggestion to her like, 'That dress looks great on you, better than on me!'. Say this like you're just having a laugh and see their reaction. They might say, 'well lets find out!'
Ultimately I guess it all depends on how well you get know each other, what she will and wont tolerate. This takes a while to judge, but don't take too long or she may feel too betrayed that you have kept such a secret from her.
Last edited by ~Tammy~; 05-25-2004 at 02:43 PM.
Reason: A few speeling mistakes :)
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New Member
With my wife, I didn't tell her until four years into the relationship, and it was this length of time that was the main problem she had with it.
On the other hand, you want to know that you can really trust the person first.
Try this link:
http://www.ren.org/rbp03.HTML
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Velvet Crossdresseruperer
Excellent link!
Lara, that is an incredible read. Some many points I can relate too. I asked my GF to read it. It gives a each side a great understanding of things.
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to tell or not to tell!!!!
jenny its simple tell her right away " if she loves you she wont mind" after all she might double her warddrobe
honesty always prevents future misunderstandings i think!
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i have yet to ttell my wife flat out and i am miserable. do it now before it's too late
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Member
As soon as possible.
I agree with most of the post.
I told my wife as early as our second date. I was cooking dinner and she happened into the bathroom of my apartment at the time and low and behold what did she find. Well you can guess.
She was accepting almost the second she walked back in to the room with an article of clothing. With a great big smile. "Whats this" she said!!
Most of you know I'm a fair skinned redhead. I turned beat red. And that was that.
20 wonderful years later, 2 daughters who share my life with me. I could not be happier.
The right mate will make you happier than anything else in your life as a dresser.
Summer
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Latex Lover
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Hello all,
The girls are right
Tell her as soon as possible and get it over with. You won't be sorry that you did because, deep down in your heart, you know its the right thing to do.
I also waited, like some of the girls, and it can get to be a sticky wicket at times. She came around after awhile. My SO is one special lady to except the fact that she is married to another girl.
Lots of Love
Suzzie (Q)
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I can say that I never really wanted to tell my wife. After all I had not told anyone in 34 years. But, last Halloween my wife's friend was having a costume party. I figured I would make a joke about cross-dressing for the party. She thought it was a pretty funny idea. I was quite thrilled to be able to dress up and go into public. So, after the party one thing lead to another and I told her that I kind of liked getting dressed up that night. She was not at all thrilled to hear this!!!! And after a few days of talking about it. She had kind of accepted it. And this was after 14 years of marriage. If I was to do it over I think I would be up front about it. Sneaking around and trying to dress is a pain
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Girls just want to have fun indeed ! Go for it girls.
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