why do people look at crossdressing weird

[janedoe311]

for me they look like men that need a hair cut and have a hormone problem!
So we are just used to it is all.

Granted men that CD usually want to look like women. But how much of that is because you either look like a women or a man, to keep the comments and snickers down. Not a man in a dress. Many CD'ers would simply just like to wear a skirt on a hot day but can not. As in another thread I started about kilt day. Even wearing kilts is not accepted at least in the US. So what is that about? It is just a Kilt.

[Kristen Kelly]

sorry gurls, but so many of you who do crossdress have a hard time accepting that you do it so if you find it strange, what the heck is the rest of society meant to think. Just my
Jess

weird (wîrd)
adj. weird·er, weird·est
Of a strikingly odd or unusual character; strange.
Thats us...LOL Like it or not we are way outside the norm, very rare too. So yeap we are weird according to societal norms.

Hello,

Even though they do have a previledge of wearing mens wear, they STILL LOOK LIKE WOMEN. Some women that wear mens wear have no desire to alter or otherwise change their gender. Where as We CD's take our enjoyment to a level no one dared ever before. CD's try to look, act, and become women for a period of time.
We are challenging the traditional standards of society. Yes some CD's feel that there is a double standard in place. But will anyone(CD,TG) take the initative to step out first and begin to change society"s outlook instead of crying out that life isnt fair?

[SIZE="3"]If you do as I had done for a while and those that accept this style of life surround your world, all is fine and good. What is the ultimate thing for many of us "Passing", and what is passing, being out in public without being noticed. So by our ultimate means of becoming a "woman" we become hidden from the public, they do not see the normally adjusted girls out there just blending in society, they see the girls in the wild outfits, or fetish wear, or those that do not blend (not that any of this is wrong). The only way things will change is if people take notice that we are not threatening to them or others, and just let us exist. [/SIZE]

[Christina Nicole]

I suppose that people have strange ideas about crossdressers. They probably think that the favorite thing for cross dressers talk about is panties. That's not true. Just ignore the thousands of posts on this board about panties. People probably think that cross dressers have weird ideas about sex like "I'm a woman when I wear women's clothes." Note A, B
Going outside in lingerie and nothing else because it feels erotic would probably seem weird to most people.

I suppose because a few cross dressers do some weird things, and are sometimes seen by others or portrayed in the media doing strange things, people get strange ideas. Stop doing strange things and maybe...

Nevermind.

If it was just the clothes, and the appearance of a woman, maybe it wouldn't be quite so strange to people. It's often more than that. That's probably what give them funny ideas.

Warm regards,
Christina Nicole

[Penny]

Yep, men used to wear wigs, lace and ruffles. Guess we went backward, huh?

yep, we traded it all in on the automobile complete with hat and goggles.
With the breeze blowing directly upon our face, I guess to much to keep the wig waum!

[NatalieGirl]

One thing that we all need to bear in mind is that other people do not have to accept what we do. We cannot force them to think in a certain way.

We have a right to dress as we please and to go out in public dressed that way. We do not have the right to go onto someone's private property dressed, if they do not want us there.

Homosexuals have also struggled to gain acceptance from the general public, and we can learn from their mistakes. Many of them have been foolishly insulting their detractors, calling them "bigoted" or "homophobic". You can hear them at gay pride marches chanting slogan like "I'm here, I'm queer, Get used to it". Such approaches only add fuel to the fire.

The best thing that we can do is to set an example. I have never been insulted or harassed while dressed, but if I ever am, I plan to handle the insults with dignity. The worst thing I could do would be respond in kind.

[marie354]

Then there was this guy that picked up this hot chick in the bar... Took her home... Found the wrong buldge!
I'm afraid that a lot of it has to do with fear. Guys are very afraid of picking up a guy in a dress. Most of them fear that most of all about dating. That makes them angery and sometimes violent.
Unfortunately there a few out there that will mislead someone else and leave a black mark on the rest of us that wouldn't even think of doing such a thing.
So, yes... People need to be educated as to just what and who we are, and we're just not like that. Most of us have a good relationship with our SO to begin with and wouldn't be trying to pick up someone of the same sex.
OK Sandy... Stop ratteling.

[bgirl]

I was afraid of crossdressers myself. I was trying to bury my own feelings and crossdressers made me uncomfortable. Now as it turns out...............
You girls are my lifeline!

[sonyinohio]

i am sorry i guess i hit one heck of hot topic hope i did not cause any hard feelings

[Tasha Meredith]

Homosexuals have also struggled to gain acceptance from the general public, and we can learn from their mistakes. Many of them have been foolishly insulting their detractors, calling them "bigoted" or "homophobic". You can hear them at gay pride marches chanting slogan like "I'm here, I'm queer, Get used to it". Such approaches only add fuel to the fire.

I totally agree with you. In think the GLBT communities would be better off trying educate rather than antagonize and look down on the people who don't yet accept us. That approach is rather childish and only highlights our differences, not the similarities.

[Satrana]

Once a long time ago in a galaxy far away, women never wore pants, (exception was in some circles riding horses.).

So when they started wearing pants did they get the problems men get for wearing dresses? And if so how long did it take to be accepted?

Not that long to become accepted although it was mostly upper class women who could get away with wearing pants. It was considered fashionably chic. The thing is when women started this, the gender roles were far more strictly defined than they are now, so these women should have been stoned to death for wearing pants but they were not.

I believe this is because women wearing pants is not seen as threatening to society while men in skirts is. This is due to several reasons - homophobic fear among men, the sexualization of female clothes, and the fact that previously women had little social power and thus what they wore was not deemed important, it was just considered part of women's dynamic fashion styles.

All the power and responsibility of society rested on the shoulders of men and thus all men had to act like men. Women's second class status meant their crossdressing was considered frivolous in the same way children are allowed to bend society's rules.

Presently men's gender role is still centered around power, status, earning potential etc so society still frowns upon men who don't live up to a man's inferred responsibilities. Men's gender role is still narrowly defined unlike womens' which is far looser and increasingly is encroaching upon men's role.

[Angie G]

Be cause most just don't understand why we do it
Angie

[Joy Carter]

I believe we've found the connection between female and male and that doesn't set right with the world. I accept who I am and if it doesn't hurt anyone, what's the big deal?

Lanore

But how long did it take any of us to accept our selves ? We are putting our selves in an alleged lower social class. We are posing as the weaker of the sex's, giving up the power and position of a man. Not to mention the sex role women play. An ex friend always said of CDing (he didn't know about me). "Guys dress as women just get into some other guys pants" I changed it because he was more graphic. Think about it ? How would anyone relate to someone posing out of their gender ? You might get some comments about your outfit. But just what else can anyone say or do when you are CD-ing ? Now those who are just plain hostile are just being jerks. And are trying to embarrass you or worse. I just don't see it changing in my life time. I think the younger generation might be more tolerant because of all the PC-ness they are exposed to now days.

[Vicky_Scot]

I think and this is IMO that men who do not dress find us a threat and show aggression towards us because of one thing.

Because we who dress are questioning the perception of what is masculinity.

FACT: For the first 6-8 weeks in the womb we are all female.

[tvbeckytv]

Homosexuals have also struggled to gain acceptance from the general public, and we can learn from their mistakes. Many of them have been foolishly insulting their detractors, calling them "bigoted" or "homophobic". You can hear them at gay pride marches chanting slogan like "I'm here, I'm queer, Get used to it". Such approaches only add fuel to the fire.

this is a curious logic. when mainstream society comes anywhere near the levels of acceptance of TGs as it has to homosexuality, then perhaps i could understand your view better.
we are not new kids on the block, we have been around just as long as homosexuals. like it or not, for homophobics to be labeled bigots by mainstream society is entirely down to political activists, and the willingness for them to be seen for what they are. really, it all started with stonewall, and what they have achieved in such a short time i think is astonishing.
by the way, imo...calling a bigot a bigot, or someone anti gay homophobic, is not being insulting

[susananklet]

As time passes mankind seems more accepting of differences.

I remember her in New Orleans when we had "open shoe laws" which made it illegal to wear clothes of the opposite sex. Remember Vice Squads. They stopped that goofiness years ago, but the Vice Squad still chases the morals thing........ Susan

[sonyinohio]

one other thing is in some places and in different times skirts kilts and other "female attire"is not looked at as being strange on a male also back in garden of eden both male and female wore fig leafs right b4 getting thrown out

[Amanda Jane]

in fact they were happy to be naked before eating of the tree of good and evil - it was only after that that they covered up.

And the eyes of them both were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together, and made themselves aprons.
And they heard the voice of the LORD God walking in the garden in the cool of the day: and Adam and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God amongst the trees of the garden.
And the LORD God called unto Adam, and said unto him, Where art thou? 3:10 And he said, I heard thy voice in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked; and I hid myself.
And he said, Who told thee that thou wast naked? Hast thou eaten of the tree, whereof I commanded thee that thou shouldest not eat?

king james version

[sonyinohio]

i was not going to go that indepth lol but your right

[noname]

Not that long to become accepted although it was mostly upper class women who could get away with wearing pants. It was considered fashionably chic. The thing is when women started this, the gender roles were far more strictly defined than they are now, so these women should have been stoned to death for wearing pants but they were not.

I believe this is because women wearing pants is not seen as threatening to society while men in skirts is. This is due to several reasons - homophobic fear among men, the sexualization of female clothes, and the fact that previously women had little social power and thus what they wore was not deemed important, it was just considered part of women's dynamic fashion styles.

All the power and responsibility of society rested on the shoulders of men and thus all men had to act like men. Women's second class status meant their crossdressing was considered frivolous in the same way children are allowed to bend society's rules.

Presently men's gender role is still centered around power, status, earning potential etc so society still frowns upon men who don't live up to a man's inferred responsibilities. Men's gender role is still narrowly defined unlike womens' which is far looser and increasingly is encroaching upon men's role.

Great post again Satrara

[Jere Oneil]

Yes, is crossdressing for some being able to wear the frilly, colorfully clothes and skirts without being "noticed"? As opposed to some of us who are not happy with our gender and self?

Because, if this society was more forgiving then men wearing colorful and frilly clothes would not be a big deal and not be crossdressing. Greek men have “skirts” and of course there are Kilts. But both are not acceptable in the US as daily wear.

So what is the problem with this society and clothes? Come on it is just clothes! Women can wear any male or female clothes, without being kicked out of restaurants or being laughed at or beat up. So why not men?

I disagree about the kilts not being accepted. I only wear skirts or dresses around my home, but with kilts, it is entirely different. While I don't wear them out in public every day, I do wear them on many occasions. I've worn a kilt to restaurants, out shopping, and to my bank with no negative comments, so far at least. You are hearing more and more about kilted men at weddings and such also. My most interesting experience, kilted, was at a grocery store in a rural area. I was on the way home from a Celtic festival, and was wearing a tartan kilt with a sweater, boots and kilt socks and flashes. People looked as I went by, but no one said anything. Then, as I was standing in the aisle near the canned vegetables, I heard someone say, "excuse me". I turned to see a large African-American gentleman standing there. I thought, "oh no, here it comes, a skirt comment or maybe more". But he just said, "Would you mind moving your cart, please". I moved it and he said, "thank you", then he said, the kilt looks good". I said thank you and we went our separate ways. So, in my area, at least, kilts are becoming acceptable as daily wear. I've also, found that women seem to love seeing a man in a kilt. I've gotten more compliments from women, from teens to near my age, than I ever did in my entire life, before I started wearing kilts. Of course, they don't know that I might be wearing panties and, or, a lacy slip under my kilt. I have been asked, but my usual comeback, of, "would you consider it appropiate for me to ask what you are wearing under your dress or skirt usually silences them.

[Vicky_Scot]

Kilt v's Skirt

Only one winner there and that's the skirt.

Even in Bonnie Scotland the wearing of a Kilt is really restricted to Weddings, Rugby/ Football Internationals, Burns Night celebrations.

It is very rare to see a man wearing a Kilt as everyday attire. But what I have found as well is if you are abroad and have a Kilt on you seem to be very popular and accepted as long as you are Scottish of course. People will ask "Your Scottish?" or "You are from Scotland?"

I always wonder what they would think if you said no.

Oh and I do not wear woman's clothes, I wear my clothes as they belong to me.

[Lindsay]

Even in Bonnie Scotland the wearing of a Kilt is really restricted to Weddings, Rugby/ Football Internationals, Burns Night celebrations.

I think your experience is very different to mine. I've been out and about loads of times in a kilt - not full highland dress, just kilt, timberlands and a t-shirt and nobody's batted an eyelid in a negative way (bar the odd ned girls shouting "show's yer arse"). Plenty of positive attention, though.

[Lindsay]

If it was just the clothes, and the appearance of a woman, maybe it wouldn't be quite so strange to people. It's often more than that. That's probably what give them funny ideas.

*round of applause*

[Bluebird GG]

we leave in a stereotypical planet as it has been since the dawn of time, but i dont see what people have a cow about a guy in a dress theirs not a damn thing wrong with it, so what if a guy wants to wear a dress people dont have to look and accept what the other person wants to do if they luv cding is their own business not anyones elses, i thought this wuz a free world, so then people get with it then!

[Tammietoo]

Be cause most just don't understand why we do it
Angie

People fear what they don't understand. Rational of not, its true. The fact of the matter is that no matter how natural or normal it is to us, to most of the world it is not "normal" behavior, and they just don't know how to take it. Instead of being open minded and tolerant, its easier for most people to fall back on their up-bringing, regional and societal sterotypes to deal with people and issues they don't immediately comprehend. Its harder for people to change and grow verses stay within their own comfort zone and fear, hate, mock, tease or worse be violent to us. Generally the only time that crossdressing is "comfortable" to the general public is when it is made comical in the media.

As far as it not being "fair" because women can crossdress without the problems that m-t-f do--its true, its not fair. But as many have pointed out, most of the girls wearing pants and other male clothing are not trying to look like a man and, for the most part we are--and therein lies one of the crutial differences. A Scotsman wearing a kilt is not trying to look like a woman and his kilt comes with hundreds of years of tradition, so in my mind that comparison doesn't really fit well into this conversation. The sad fact there are still racist people out there, and wondering why some people can't accept a man in a dress, when some still can't accept a person of a different race, puts this in a little perspective for me.