First of all, thank-you from the bottom of my heart for all the kind posts, PM's emails and phone calls. You've all touched my life in an unbelievably wonderful and beautiful way.
We had a bit of a crisis at our house last week... some of it real, some imagined. A huge percentage of it was based on misunderstanding. I want to be very, very. very clear on something... neither my wife nor my daughter were the villains in this. There was really no villain at all. This whole experience has taught me a couple of things that I would like to pass on to you.
It all started when my wife was asked to pass a message to me. The message seemed to be critical of my lifestyle as a cross dresser. Having now the benefit of hindsight, I don't believe it was; but on that day, and with those words, that's how it was perceived.
Lesson One- If you have something to say to someone, say it yourself. Don't send someone else to do your job. Had the actual person spoken to me directly, any misunderstanding could have been cleared up immediately.
Lesson Two- If someone you love and who loves you says something that is out of character, seek clarification right then and there. If allowed to go unchecked, it will likely take on a life of it's own. And the result could be devastating.
Lesson Three- Keep your emotions in check... especially if you are feeling anger. I've never know anyone (myself included) that makes good decisions while angry. Step away for awhile if you must. Calm down and regain control before going on. If you don't, chances are that you will say or do something that you will regret.
Lesson Four- If asking for forgiveness, ask sincerely and from the heart. If giving forgiveness, give it unqualified and without reservation. You may find that you are doing some of both. That makes sense as rarely is a situation 100% the fault of one individual.
Lesson Five- Trust the love you have built up and on over the years. I don't know of anyone who loves their partner because they are perfect. They love their partner because they complete them and give meaning to their life.
Lesson Six- It's easier to change yourself than it is to change your partner. Let me give you a real life example; It used to drive me crazy that my wife wouldn't close cabinet doors. I'd get all knotted up over it and fuss and fume. And in over 38 years of marriage it hasn't gotten any better. When I discovered that I could close the doors, my anxiety dropped like a rock. How can you apply this to your relationship?
There's probably other stuff I could mention but I think this covers the important things. Always be willing to believe the best in your relationships. Resist the temptation to anticipate the worst.
Originally Posted by Roberta Lynn
So good to see you back with us again. You gave us a scare girl. 
