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Thread: My experiment...

  1. #26
    Swishy Pirate CaptLex's Avatar
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    Wow, Lisa came to visit - if I had known, I would have put out the good china.

    Poc, you're so bad teasing poor Kieron with the Oreos. I want to send you guys a boxful, so you don't fight over them. Great pics, dude . . . er, dudette! It's amazing how well you look both ways.
    But why is the rum gone?! - Capt. Jack Sparrow [SIZE="1"]Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl[/SIZE]

    Why is the rum always gone? - Capt. Jack Sparrow [SIZE="1"]Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest[/SIZE]

    Why is all but the rum gone? No, the rum's gone too . . .
    - [SIZE="1"]Pirates of the Caribbean: At World End[/SIZE]

    [SIZE="3"]Lex on the Beach[/SIZE]. . . [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  2. #27
    Senior Member Tree GG's Avatar
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    Well that's just not fair.

    You know, some people spend their whole life trying to look good in one gender. Some TG's do look very attractive in the "other" gender.

    How come you rate looking so good either way? Obviously born under that elusive "hot" star sign.

    Wish I could make your choices easier, hun but no can do. I'm remembering my sister's sequence of events when coming out as a lesbian. After coming out, a few times she did date guys and although I don't know the whole details, it apparently didn't work. She is now in a committed lesbian relationship that seems to be working great. Self-doubt is common. Maybe if you start thinking of it as a choice, instead of a should or shouldn't decision you'd feel calmer.

    Anyway, the people you love in your life may not jump on that bandwagon with you immediately, but after awhile of you talking the talk and walking the walk - either way you decide to go - they'll fall right in behind ya.



    PS Am I understanding that smuggling Oreos into Europe could be a lucrative business opportunity?

  3. #28
    In the middle bi_weird's Avatar
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    Omw Poc...I can't believe that's you.
    I'm in total shock right now.
    First, because you're beautiful.
    Second, 'cause it's like there's two Pocs - the boyish pictures and the girlish pictures. You pass so well in the other ones, I can't even connect that these ones are you.
    Wow.
    I wanna know, can you show me
    I wanna know about these
    strangers like me
    Tell me more, please show me
    Somethings familiar about these strangers like me

  4. #29
    Silver Member Lisa Golightly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CaptLex View Post
    Wow, Lisa came to visit - if I had known, I would have put out the good china.
    Oh, I drop by here and there... You boys are normally too busy to notice
    Der Transsexuellaußenseiter

    The lovers have flown...

    [SIZE="3"]VENI VIDI VICI[/SIZE]

  5. #30
    Swishy Pirate CaptLex's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lisa Golightly View Post
    Oh, I drop by here and there... You boys are normally too busy to notice
    Never too busy for you, hun, you know that.

    I'm beginning to wonder if there are two Pocs out there, separated at birth . . . not just a boy and girl Poc, but even a British one and an American one (that explains the easy access to Oreos). Hmmmm . . . .
    But why is the rum gone?! - Capt. Jack Sparrow [SIZE="1"]Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl[/SIZE]

    Why is the rum always gone? - Capt. Jack Sparrow [SIZE="1"]Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest[/SIZE]

    Why is all but the rum gone? No, the rum's gone too . . .
    - [SIZE="1"]Pirates of the Caribbean: At World End[/SIZE]

    [SIZE="3"]Lex on the Beach[/SIZE]. . . [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  6. #31
    Silver Member Lisa Golightly's Avatar
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    I have to state Poc is amazing.... Be great to have him in the studio... Praise from me?... On a Wednesday?... Surely not.
    Der Transsexuellaußenseiter

    The lovers have flown...

    [SIZE="3"]VENI VIDI VICI[/SIZE]

  7. #32
    Aspiring Member GACountrygal's Avatar
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    WOW, Poc you look awesome both ways!!

    About all I can say is you gotta be comfortable with yourself, either way, to be truely happy!! I do hope ya figure things out, its tough when tryin to choose the right path to take, especially when theres so many things pullin ya this way and that!

    Hopefully this experiment helps ya figure some things out either way!!

    Nic

  8. #33
    Senior Member Felix's Avatar
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    Hi Poc been readin ya thread again and was thinkin about all the times in my life when I've done things to keep other people happy. I have learned in part that thats not always a good idea. Although I know that when I visit my parents I always dress down and more feminine. Lol still wear trousers but more fem and tops that are more fem. It's only for like 24hrs so that's not so bad even though I will hate every minute it keeps the old dears happy a little and gives them less to moan about. I grew my hair not so long ago to keep them happy but I was incredibly unhappy. I tried to convince myself that I was happy and that I liked it but don't know who I was foolin. I got it cut and I felt liberated. The real me was back so that's one part of me no matter how much moaning they dole at me I won't change. I think I compromise at the clothes lol I can only just manage that at a push!! What I'm sayin Poc is ya young and like Kieron and the Captain said do things for you so it don't mess ya up but within that there is always some room for compromise. Take care sweetie and big hugs

  9. #34
    sweet lil ' cookie Sierra Evon's Avatar
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    Sounds to me like alot of complexity's in your life , good luck to ya tho !!!!
    " too young to fall in love " schoolgirl "

  10. #35
    Gold Member MJ's Avatar
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    hey poc
    omg you look drop dead gorgeous , " sorry if i offend " is that you ? , well i am in shock i sure wish i was younger you would look great right by my side the perfect 10

    anyway i felt just like you did at one time, but i lived my life for others and not for myself trust me the years of living a lie took it's toll on me, and one day i had enough , you have one life to live Hun/man and you alone must make the decision ,
    just be yourself
    hugs Marissa
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  11. #36
    Silver Member kerrianna's Avatar
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    [SIZE="4"]OMG!!!! I can't believe it![/SIZE]

    I can't believe you guys don't get Oreos in England!
    I mean, I can walk down the street and come home with a huge BAG of them! It's like they grow in the trees here. There's Oreos everywhere!

    How can you barbarians live like that? Oh, you poor poor people. We'll have to send some over on a big ship. Capt, next port we gotta stock up on Oreos for the poor blighters.
    Just goes to show you, you can take things for granted not knowing how hard it is for some people.

    Oh, yeah, nice pics Pocs. You could grow donkey ears and still look great. Your soul shines through and lights up the world.
    "I dwell in possibility."

    "Say what you want and be who you are, because those who matter don't mind, and those who matter don't mind."--Dr. Seuss

    "I learned long ago, never to wrestle with a pig. You get dirty, and besides, the pig likes it."
    George Bernard Shaw

  12. #37
    2ndCabinBoy/1stSkirtBoy Evert's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by kerrianna View Post
    [SIZE="4"]OMG!!!! I can't believe it![/SIZE]

    I can't believe you guys don't get Oreos in England!

    Even we, the mad dutch, have oreos!
    I'm back! Shiver with fear!

  13. #38
    Cabin boy/Purser :)
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    Lol Kimberley, you're rum-ball obsessed.... .... .....

    Lisa, must be nice to know what you are! Oooh... that's intriguing..dithering leading to some good experiences... thanks for wise words. Haha I might take you up on that wig offer!

    Capt - yaay Oreos... send send! Aaww thanks!

    Tree - haha!!! "Hot sign" I think not! Teehee.
    Thanks for your words they are very cool and make a lot of sense.
    LOL yes Oreo smuggling could be the next big thing!

    Bi - .... awwwwww, thank you.
    But, um...you appear to have slipped those beer goggles on again!
    Oh dear... the "looking/seeming like 2 people" thing again... oh yes it's so confusing....

    Lisa again.... like Cap said... never too busy to notice you *winks*

    Hehehe Cap again... don't make me spank you (you know you end up enjoying it waaay too much)!

    Lisa again again... Thank you... Yay... sounds fun Wooo praise from LG!

    CountryGal... awh thank you very much! I hope I figure things out soon too!

    Felix, that makes a LOT of sense actually. Thank you my friend *hugg*
    I'm really glad that you are happier with yourself now btw!

    Sierra, yeah... nature of the TG beast for some people I guess
    Thank you very much!

    MJ - hehe no that doesn't offend me. I think it's nice, (confusing.. but nice lol). Ok.. yes I will remember your words... about it being important to think of yourself too and stuff.... I am glad you were strong and brave and started to look out for you!

    Kerrikerriannaaaa - hahaha you are such a twonk
    Oooh the great Oreo famine of '07 lol!!
    Awww thank you, you're so lovely. I'm glad that you still sort of see it as "me" both ways.... (well I mean hello, I'm still totally goofy and silly both ways!) You're a babe, babe!


    P.S.... we DO get Oreos in England...hence the photos lol!
    Pretty rare though I guess...
    I don't need advice on how to be a man. I just am one.

    www.dec.org.uk <-- in desperate need of our help.

    YO, yeh you! Please pray for &/or send your positive thoughts and love to Carol. And for Dominic, and Steve, and Karl. Miracles do happen, let's make them! Thank you kind person! And for Tristan's grandad to get better. & lovely Taylor. Pleease.

    PLEASE PRAY 4 CAROL'S LAST DAY OF RADIATION TREATMENT TO HAVE WORKED COMPLETELY EXCELLENTLY AND DESTROYED ALL THE BADNESS!! THANK YOU!

  14. #39
    Silver Member kerrianna's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by pocoyo View Post
    Kerrikerriannaaaa - hahaha you are such a twonk
    Okay, I had to go look that one up in the dictionary Kieron sent us once:

    twonk n. Yet another of our friendly words meaning something like idiot. There seem to be more ways of politely describing your friends as mentally deficient in British English than anything else.

    Gee, thanks. This coming from the self-described village idiot. Takes one to know one, eh, hun?
    "I dwell in possibility."

    "Say what you want and be who you are, because those who matter don't mind, and those who matter don't mind."--Dr. Seuss

    "I learned long ago, never to wrestle with a pig. You get dirty, and besides, the pig likes it."
    George Bernard Shaw

  15. #40
    Gold Member MJ's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by pocoyo View Post
    Lol Kimberley, you're rum-ball obsessed.... .... .....

    Lisa, must be nice to know what you are! Oooh... that's intriguing..dithering leading to some good experiences... thanks for wise words. Haha I might take you up on that wig offer!

    Capt - yaay Oreos... send send! Aaww thanks!

    Tree - haha!!! "Hot sign" I think not! Teehee.
    Thanks for your words they are very cool and make a lot of sense.
    LOL yes Oreo smuggling could be the next big thing!

    Bi - .... awwwwww, thank you.
    But, um...you appear to have slipped those beer goggles on again!
    Oh dear... the "looking/seeming like 2 people" thing again... oh yes it's so confusing....

    Lisa again.... like Cap said... never too busy to notice you *winks*

    Hehehe Cap again... don't make me spank you (you know you end up enjoying it waaay too much)!

    Lisa again again... Thank you... Yay... sounds fun Wooo praise from LG!

    CountryGal... awh thank you very much! I hope I figure things out soon too!

    Felix, that makes a LOT of sense actually. Thank you my friend *hugg*
    I'm really glad that you are happier with yourself now btw!

    Sierra, yeah... nature of the TG beast for some people I guess
    Thank you very much!

    MJ - hehe no that doesn't offend me. I think it's nice, (confusing.. but nice lol).
    Ok.. yes I will remember your words... about it being important to think of yourself too and stuff....
    I am glad you were strong and brave and started to look out for you!

    Kerrikerriannaaaa - hahaha you are such a twonk
    Oooh the great Oreo famine of '07 lol!!
    Awww thank you, you're so lovely. I'm glad that you still sort of see it as "me" both ways.... (well I mean hello, I'm still totally goofy and silly both ways!) You're a babe, babe!


    P.S.... we DO get Oreos in England...hence the photos lol!
    Pretty rare though I guess...
    well as you are young and full of life, i don't want you to make the mistake of trying to live a lie ,
    what if a good looking guy comes along ? you get married and then years later your "gid " issues come back and you want to transition
    i just don't want you to go through the hurt and pain and the hell i did and many others here have done ,
    i just wish i had the guts back when i was a young "teen age man " to tell my mun and dad i wanted to be a girl and went through with it..
    but i do wish you well and hope you find your answers
    love n hugs
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  16. #41
    Cabin boy/Purser :)
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    Quote Originally Posted by MJ View Post
    well as you are young and full of life, i don't want you to make the mistake of trying to live a lie ,
    Yeah I'm scared of that too... I'm young but I am 25... is that still young enough to be biding my time?

    what if a good looking guy comes along ? you get married and then years later your "gid " issues come back and you want to transition
    Urg exactly.... and that would SO happen.
    (Not that I'd get married but if I got in a relationship yes...)
    But I have been in a sort of long term relationship before when I was like 17/18-21 and I was soo not myself with him, or with any of my boyfriends really. So I don't ever want to compromise who I am again... So darn good advice MJ!

    i just don't want you to go through the hurt and pain and the hell i did and many others here have done ,
    I'm so sorry that you went through that I am so glad you aren't now.
    I don't want to go through that either.


    i just wish i had the guts back when i was a young "teen age man " to tell my mun and dad i wanted to be a girl and went through with it..
    but i do wish you well and hope you find your answers
    love n hugs
    Aww I wish you did too But at least you got a whole load of experience and knowledge that you might not otherwise have gained this way!

    It's different a little bit... because you KNEW you wanted to be a girl?
    Well you see I'm NOT sure... for lots and lots and lots of reasons... whether I truly want to be/am meant to be/should be a boy.

    If I DID know.. I would so just go ahead and start doing it I think.

    Oooh the confusion!
    Last edited by pocoyo; 02-07-2007 at 07:10 PM.
    I don't need advice on how to be a man. I just am one.

    www.dec.org.uk <-- in desperate need of our help.

    YO, yeh you! Please pray for &/or send your positive thoughts and love to Carol. And for Dominic, and Steve, and Karl. Miracles do happen, let's make them! Thank you kind person! And for Tristan's grandad to get better. & lovely Taylor. Pleease.

    PLEASE PRAY 4 CAROL'S LAST DAY OF RADIATION TREATMENT TO HAVE WORKED COMPLETELY EXCELLENTLY AND DESTROYED ALL THE BADNESS!! THANK YOU!

  17. #42
    Action crossdresser Marlena Dahlstrom's Avatar
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    Oooh Pocs, you tease... Getting Keiron (and the rest of us) all worked up.

    We might have to force you to keep crossdressing.
    Lena

    A dream? What is a dream, but a blueprint for courageous action.

    http://www.adahlshouse.com

  18. #43
    Silver Member Lisa Golightly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by pocoyo View Post
    I'm young but I am 25... is that still young enough to be biding my time?


    I have been in a sort of long term relationship before when I was like 17/18-21 and I was soo not myself with him, or with any of my boyfriends really. So I don't ever want to compromise who I am again...

    Well you see I'm NOT sure... for lots and lots and lots of reasons... whether I truly want to be/am meant to be/should be a boy.

    If I DID know.. I would so just go ahead and start doing it I think.

    Oooh the confusion!
    Poc,

    You kind of remind me of me... I don't know if it is for similar reasons, but your doubts sound like mine... In the past I always had issues with people viewing me as this person they knew when infact I knew they didn't know me at all. I was a maelstrom of doubt and anger...

    But as I wandered through time and I saw friends enter life with their partners and settle down, and scene friends transform into the people they wanted to be I kind of always came back to my same doubts...

    See, for me I never felt re-construction would change the foundations of who I essentially was. The people that would enter 'her' life would see the colour of 'her' and not really see me... I'm alloy... A blend of male and female. To choose one would be to halve myself. Probably doesn't make sense to most people, who see my feminine form as a something other than natural, especially a lot of the transsexuals who've always viewed me as a bit of a heretic (Truth is I still blush when someone stares at my breasts... I'm not good with things like that as I'm very shy). I always felt a bit pressurised as people I knew had grs around me... it nagged at me, but being a bit of a dreamy type the mechanics of the body don't interest me that much... I'm too much of a child...

    My biggest doubt was always... 'Who could love this... mish-mash of genders?'

    And I guess in the end that is what most of us really want... to understand ourselves and find someone who accepts us for whom we are... not just our insecurities, our self doubts, our shyness, our anger, our petulance, our thoughtfulness, our passion, but see beyond our biological form, and just know who we are...

    Carry on biding your time for as long as you need. There is someone out there that will accept who you are and celebrate that uniqueness. They see beyond the things we hate about ourselves and when you've touched their life, and they've touched yours you'll smile to yourself and say... 'Yes, I bloody well knew I was right!'

    Lisa x
    Last edited by Lisa Golightly; 02-08-2007 at 03:48 AM.
    Der Transsexuellaußenseiter

    The lovers have flown...

    [SIZE="3"]VENI VIDI VICI[/SIZE]

  19. #44
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    Quote Originally Posted by kerrianna View Post
    Okay, I had to go look that one up in the dictionary Kieron sent us once:

    twonk n. Yet another of our friendly words meaning something like idiot. There seem to be more ways of politely describing your friends as mentally deficient in British English than anything else.

    Gee, thanks. This coming from the self-described village idiot. Takes one to know one, eh, hun?
    glad to see my dictionary is useful lol

  20. #45
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    Quote Originally Posted by Marlena Dahlstrom View Post
    We might have to force you to keep crossdressing.
    Doh! like thats gonna worry him!

  21. #46
    Cabin boy/Purser :)
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    Lol Kieron!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Lisa Golightly View Post
    issues with people viewing me as this person they knew when infact I knew they didn't know me at all.
    That bit sounds really familiar.

    I think it's cool that you know who you are.

    My biggest doubt was always... 'Who could love this... mish-mash of genders?'
    awwww Well some people would adore a "mish-mash of genders".
    I would.

    I do feel a little like a mish mash of genders, but inside.
    I don't understand why I have these pinings and yearnings to have a male form.

    Yes, I definitley want to undstand myself. Well.. a little more at least...

    It would be nice to have someone see beyond the physical yeah. But in my case I don't think anyone is ever going to see my inner boy, unless I wear him as my outer-boy!
    Plus the whole "I'd feel more comfortable with a male body" is an issue I have to consider...but it's the REASONS I'd feel more comfortable with a male body that confuse me. Like... is it because I just dislike myself so much that I want to become someone else? Or is it because that is my true form? Etc etc.

    I think, without a doubt I would feel more comfortable and able to function within a relationship as a male. But it's why that makes me hesitate. And is it right...would I be making a huge mistake because of all these other factors.... etc etc

    Thanks so much for your wise words Lisa...
    They've made me consider something that was obvious all along but got lost in the whirl of confusion and so many other thoughts.

    You're very cool
    Pocs XxX
    I don't need advice on how to be a man. I just am one.

    www.dec.org.uk <-- in desperate need of our help.

    YO, yeh you! Please pray for &/or send your positive thoughts and love to Carol. And for Dominic, and Steve, and Karl. Miracles do happen, let's make them! Thank you kind person! And for Tristan's grandad to get better. & lovely Taylor. Pleease.

    PLEASE PRAY 4 CAROL'S LAST DAY OF RADIATION TREATMENT TO HAVE WORKED COMPLETELY EXCELLENTLY AND DESTROYED ALL THE BADNESS!! THANK YOU!

  22. #47
    Silver Member Lisa Golightly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by pocoyo View Post
    It would be nice to have someone see beyond the physical yeah. But in my case I don't think anyone is ever going to see my inner boy, unless I wear him as my outer-boy!
    Oh, I see him in your eyes in every photograph. The eyes give everyone away

    Quote Originally Posted by pocoyo View Post
    Plus the whole "I'd feel more comfortable with a male body" is an issue I have to consider...but it's the REASONS I'd feel more comfortable with a male body that confuse me. Like... is it because I just dislike myself so much that I want to become someone else? Or is it because that is my true form? Etc etc.
    I can't say I was ever thrilled with what I got lumbered with myself It would have been so much simpler if I'd been a girl... Or would it? Would I just have a whole set of other issues? I admire your honesty... it's a commodity I prize above all.
    Der Transsexuellaußenseiter

    The lovers have flown...

    [SIZE="3"]VENI VIDI VICI[/SIZE]

  23. #48
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    OMG, Poc we love you man we do, but when I seen your girlie pic's , all I seen was MtoF, I can see why the folks are having a hard time, I know you don't want to here it but your very pretty, so you just need to find that middle area to keep them and most importantly you happy, and I'm sorry I called you pretty, you can smack me any time

  24. #49
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tina Dixon View Post
    and I'm sorry I called you pretty, you can smack me any time
    you wish!!!!

  25. #50
    Senior Member Tree GG's Avatar
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    Lucky, perhaps?

    Quote Originally Posted by pocoyo View Post
    ...It's different a little bit... because you KNEW you wanted to be a girl?
    Well you see I'm NOT sure... for lots and lots and lots of reasons... whether I truly want to be/am meant to be/should be a boy....
    One last comment and I'll put my therapist suit away.

    Maybe you're one of the lucky few who have really trans-ed the gender line. I keep asking, and haven't gotten a satsifactory answer IMO, what's it mean to be feminine? What's it mean to be masculine? Other than the stereotypical attributes (soft vs strong; small vs big; nurturing vs. sink or swim; etc etc) no one can say. And personally, I don't know anyone that fits those stereotypes even to a 50% level - I don't think that person exists... male or female.

    The body/physical part is just biology - needed for propogation of the species. Other than that, how do you know a loving caress is delivered from a man or a woman if you have your eyes closed?

    As Lisa said, you've got these eyes that just radiate a sparkling, fun and honest soul. Why worry about permanent changes? Feel like looking like a boy today - look like a boy. Feel like looking like a typical girl today? - look like a girl. Even if your presentation is based on what you believe someone you care about wants to see, so what? You're giving them a gift, not changing who you are. The women AND men in my life that I respect the most are strong, yet gentle and caring. The point is THE SAME HUMAN SOUL CHARACTERISTICS - doesn't matter which role in species propogation they play.

    I completely understand this does not apply to those who really are TS and are 100% certain their birth gender is not how they would be happiest. But if you're not sure, how's about being Pocoyo gendered? Do, say, react, be as makes you feel good about yourself and just let the rest fall into place (because I'm 100% certain it will).

    In my book, men can play with dolls (and pantyhose ) and be submissive and kiss boo boos and decorate homes; women can assert themselves and be boisterous and fix cars and not care that their bag doesn't match their shoes.

    Be Pocoyo first, gender second. Cause from where I'm sitting, you are infectious and smiles bloom wherever you go.

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